


Wipe Out

by Veritas33



Series: Supercorp Surfing AU [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015), supercorp - Fandom
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Angst, Bisexual Kara Danvers, Cat Grant - Freeform, Dox, Drama, Endgame, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Happy Ending, Hawaii, Humor, Intimacy, Kara Danvers - Freeform, LGBTQ, Lena Luthor - Freeform, Loss, Love, Lucy Lane - Freeform, Ocean, Rough Sex, Sexual exploration, Smut, Soulmates, SuperCorp, Supergirl au, Surfing, Trans Nia Nal, Useless Lesbian Lena Luthor, Vacation, beach, james olsen - Freeform, loss trauma, photographer, sam arias - Freeform, self sabbotage, soft, soft smut, surfer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2020-12-31 07:07:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 51,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21108986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veritas33/pseuds/Veritas33
Summary: A surfing AU in which Kara is a former champion surfer forced to retire after an injury that nearly took her life, and Lena is a photographer turned fashion editor visiting Oahu for her best friend's wedding.Fluff, smut and drama ensues when their worlds *literally* collide.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Before doing sequels to my popular last fic, I decided to try my hand at an AU. Will update as I can. Enjoy, and please drop a comment if you dig it. Makes it all worth it. :)

_Destination. Wedding_.

Lena had cringed when the words came out of Sam’s mouth. She didn’t have the best track record with destination weddings. The last one she’d been to was for her long-time assistant, Jess. She and her fiancé Jason had chosen to have it on a beach in Mexico. A great idea in theory, until half the party contracted food poisoning. Between the violent illness before the event and alcohol consumption during and after, Lena barely remembered much about the trip. All she knew was it took a full week to recover.

So when Sam mentioned Hawaii, all Lena could think about was - bugs. Humidity. Grass skirts. Beans in snowcones. _Who puts beans in a snowcone?_

As a successful fashion photographer turned digital magazine editor-in-chief from Los Angeles, Lena had been all over the word - yet _somehow_ she’d never found her way to Hawaii.

But now as she steps off the private plane in Oahu, and feels a warm Pacific breeze sweep through her hair, the idea of a destination wedding didn’t sound quite so bad.

And when she’s greeted by a rather beautiful young brunette with a lei in hand who places it at her neck and warmly kisses her cheek as she steps onto the tarmac - it doesn’t sound bad at all.

Of course she hides her reaction as her fellow bridesmaids pile down behind her and screech at the sight of a grinning Sam approaching from the nearby black limo. Lena had never, and would never, be obvious with her attraction to women around anyone. Because she’d never told a soul. Yes, as hard as it might have been for anyone to believe considering her line of work and location of residence - Lena Luthor was very much in the closet. So in the closet, in fact, she’d never even acted on her attractions. She’d only ever had relationships with men, earlier in her life. And for the past few years, she had grown accustomed to being single. Perpetually, endlessly, painfully single. Because what she really wanted, she couldn’t have. She was part Irish. She came from a somewhat wealthy, conservative Catholic family. The fact that she lived and worked in Los Angeles, in an industry deemed superficial, surrounded, if not inundated, by the LGBTQ community - was already a sore spot for her mother. But her success and accomplishments had at least silenced her enough to stop saying “Your father would turn over in his grave.” every time she saw Lena’s work, which often featured half-nude models from high fashion shoots and runway shows. 

Lena had decided long ago that she wasn’t going to risk her mother’s condemnation and mentions of eternal damnation unless it was worth it. Perhaps some day she’d meet someone who would make her feel at ease enough to give into her attractions. Perhaps some day that person would make her feel at ease enough to come out to her family and risk it all. But living in LA, surrounded by bottom feeders who would sell their own family down the river for an extra 10k Instagram followers - was not the place she’d find someone like that. And since Lena had no plans to move, she’d become accustomed to a solitary lifestyle focused on her work and - well, that was about it.

Which is why these damn weddings were becoming a thorn in her side.

And when she’s suddenly pulled into a group hug with high-pitched squeals of excitement in her ears and fake nails clutching around her skin, courtesy of the small hoard of perky women surrounding her - she’s reminded of that fact all over again.

It’d been a long flight with them, that was for sure. She appreciated Sam’s gift to her bridesmaids being a chartered jet, but being stuck in such a small space with the rest of Sam’s friends, most of whom Lena barely knew, all of whom’s voices ended in an upswing as if they were asking a question even when they weren’t, a signature of LA women she’d done her best to tolerate every day already - she suddenly thought of Mexico all over again.

Yes, Lena fully believed this was yet another a trip that was going to take time to get over.

——-

The ride to the resort felt longer than the flight.

“Thank you for coming.” Sam nudges Lena playfully in the back of the limo with champagne in hand.

“You’re my best friend, Sam. You think I’d miss it?”

“Only because I know how much you hate destination weddings.”

Lena raises her glass - _touché_.

“So what’s on the agenda, Sammy?” Sam’s petite brunette friend Lucy suddenly chimes in, stopping the hushed giggles from the full row on the other side.

“Oh, ladies. When you see what I have planned for us - ” Sam begins.

“And here I thought the bridesmaids were supposed to plan the activities.” Lena jokingly accuses.

“Please. I’m way too much of a control freak to let you crazy bitches put all this together. Also, I have less than zero interest in strippers and ridiculous phallic party favors, okay. _Lucy_.”

Lucy feigns offense.

Lena can’t help but be relieved to hear this. “So what are we doing?” she asks with as much interest as she can muster.

“All I can say is - check into your rooms. And put on your best bikinis.”

“Ohhhhhh!!!” a collective squeal of excitement fills the car as everyone toasts and laughs and Lena forces a smile - and then guzzles.

——-

The room had a nice view, she’ll give them that. It was at least a dozen stories up and Lena could see the ocean stretching as far as the eye can see. She found herself standing at the balcony peering out for the longest time. So long in fact, she somehow did something she rarely does - lose track of time.

Her phone buzzing “HURRY UP BISH” suddenly startles her back to reality.

A moment later, Lena stands staring at the bathing suit options she’d brought. She wasn’t one to usually wear bikinis often in public. Other people liked to compliment her body, always saying how they’d kill to have her curves, but she always found herself a bit wary of exposure - especially where sun was involved, given her practically porcelain skin. Still - she’s in Oahu. And if she came downstairs in anything but a bikini she’d stick out like a sore thumb. And be chastised by Sam in a heartbeat.

So, she puts on her best two piece - a simple maroon number with a thin white and gold sarong wrapped loosely at her hips. She takes a breath, and heads downstairs. 

——-

After a quick pile into a Mercedes van and bumpy ride to a more “authentic” location, as Sam had called it -

Lena suddenly finds herself face to face with a row of buff local men. Four total. Two of them covered in tribal tattoos. They were all incredibly cute. And hot. Okay, so they were both. Everyone in the bachelorette party was staring, and Sam was biting her lip.

“See. So much better than strippers.” Sam said low to Lena, standing next to her.

“Ladies, I’d like you to meet - our surfing instructors.” Sam then announced to the group.

Of course. Lena should’ve expected as much. How she didn’t see this coming, she’d never know. It was that damn Pacific air that had seduced her. And now as she stood chest-level with a rather intimidating but sweet young man who introduced himself as JJ as he tries not to be too obvious with eyeing her up and down, she swallows nervously.

“Just enjoy the ride, Lena…” Sam trails off as she’s led to her board by another one of the other guys.

Before long, she finds herself pressed on her front against a long board, instructions being gently given by the guys to “hop up quick” - and she tries but it’s sloppy and she knows there’s no way she’ll ever be able to catch a real wave.

But still, she plays along. The other girls giggle and wink to each other every time the guys’ caramel muscles flex while demonstrating anything. Some of them even feign needing extra help or a more ‘hands on’ approach.

Lena quickly grows bored of the ‘training’ and finds her own gaze wandering towards the beach as they all pair off, four of the girls and four of the guys, plus Sam who steps away to take a call from her fiancee Jack about some emergency wedding details.

Lena stares out to the stunning ocean crashing against the beach. And that’s when something - or, _someone_ \- catches her eye.

And it’s no wonder, because you’d have to be blind to miss them.

It’s a woman. Around Lena’s age. She’s tall and slim but still curvy, and despite the black wetsuit she wears, you can tell she has olive skin from what’s likely years in a sun that has somehow not damaged it in the least. Her hair is long and blonde, sun-kissed with perfect highlights that any woman in LA would envy and pay a fortune to match, but is obviously just natural for her.

She stands at the edge of the waterline, next to a young brunette who also wears a wetsuit and is holding a surfboard. The girl is maybe 13. The blonde suddenly points out to the water, giving a gesture and look as if she was providing the girl some kind of instruction. The girl nods and picks up the board and heads into the water.

And when the blonde briefly turns to peer down the beach while waiting on the girl to reach deeper waters, Lena can finally see her face -

She’s stunning. Though she’s still somewhat far away, Lena can still tell she’s beautiful. Possibly even the most naturally beautiful woman she’s ever seen in real life. And as someone who worked with models every day - that was saying something.

Lena finds herself staring, ignoring the cackles and boisterous laughter behind her between the women and their instructors.

Suddenly, whatever the girl was trying to do - it doesn’t go well. She’s clearly no beginner, as she was quite skilled at the approach and standing on her board, but when she tries to pull off a quick maneuver - it doesn’t go as planned and she winds up slipping off her board and into the water.

The blonde winces and gestures for her to bring it in. She speaks to the girl again, briefly pointing out and twisting her own body as if to demonstrate. Finally she just nods, and it becomes clear - she’s going to show her herself.

What Lena witnesses next blows her away. The woman takes a few quick steps into the surf, smoothly gliding atop her board as if it was merely an extension of her body, topping a rather large incoming wave with ease. The next one, she dives straight under and through, smoothly emerging from beneath the surface, the water parting for her like she’d already wined and dined it. Lena can’t help but smile as she watches the woman then ride a medium-sized wave with the most skill and leisure she’s ever seen. She cuts to the side, maneuvers coolly, and finishes the wave. She rides the board in most of the way, until she hops off in shallow water, grabs up the board and gives it to the girl who smiles and nods and immediately heads out to try again.

The blonde meanwhile - wipes the moisture from her face and eyes and runs a hand through wet hair, bending over briefly to whip the excess out before rising back up.

And when she rises and it falls damply around her, she then reaches back and unzips the top half of the wet suit, turning briefly in Lena’s direction as it strips lower and lower, past a blue bikini top, and comes to rest at her lower hips - Lena loses all air from her lungs and her lips part.

She can’t breathe. Or swallow. Or move. Because all she sees is biceps and abs. Head-to-toe, this woman is a flawless goddess. Every inch of her skin is tight and tanned. Every curve is accented with toned muscle. And the obvious veins that run from her hands to her forearms are enough to make Lena's entire body flush.

“Amazing right?” Sam suddenly says, appearing beside her.

“W-what?” Lena chokes out.

“The view?”

“Uh- I…“ she can’t form words. She’d never been caught staring at anybody like this and now she wishes she could burrow into the sand. If only she could move. Or speak. Or do anything but stand there with her mouth agape, struggling to find the right words to cover -

“I never thought I’d be getting married somewhere so beautiful.” Sam then finishes and Lena relaxes. That was almost too close. She clears her throat.

“Right. Yeah, it’s - incredible. It’s an incredible place.”

Sam slings an arm around Lena and gives her a squeeze -

“Come on! The guys are waiting.” Sam said slyly.

“Oh, uh -“

“You can’t wait forever to pop that cherry, Lena.”

“I’m sorry?” Lena asked with a startle.

“You’re gonna have to try your first wave.”

“Oh, Sam I don’t think I’m-“

“Not optional, Lena Luthor. JJ’s waiting!” she orders quickly as she followed the guys and Lena turned to find JJ smiling and politely waiting on her, just as Sam had said.

When Lena looks one last time over her shoulder, she catches sight of mystery blonde one last time, watching as the the girl succeeds in her maneuver and the blonde erupts in a smile and authentic, supportive cheer unlike anything Lena’s ever seen. It’s a positive energy that somehow makes Lena’s soul feel ten pounds lighter and the edges of her own lips curl involuntarily.

And suddenly - she thinks maybe she can give in. “Let’s do this, Lena!” JJ says enthusiastically, noticing her smile and thinking it’s for him and their activity.

Lena feels a swell of bravery, and nods, following him out to the water.

The first try is a complete bust. She can’t even get up on the board. She wobbles, clutching the board on her knees as JJ yells for her to stand up, but - she just slips right over onto her side, splashing into the water 

“That’s okay!” she hears warbled as she breaks the surface and wipes her eyes. The salt stings and she has no idea how these people do this all the time, but she assumes one must get used to it. Through blurred vision she can’t help but look to her right to be sure no one saw this embarrassing display. Especially a certain blonde water goddess. But she doesn’t see her. Maybe she left. The thought makes Lena sink a little.

“That’s okay, let’s get another one!” JJ says, grabbing Lena’s hand and pulling her further out into the water, “A bigger one! It’ll give you more time.”

“Oh I don’t think - “ she tries to protest, but before she knows it she’s chest deep in the ocean, having drifted pretty far away from the rest of the group and he’s telling her to get ready.

“Go go go go!” he says suddenly and she panics and tries to listen and pushes forward. She feels the thrust of the wave launching her forward and her eyes go wide and she tries to process what little she’d paid attention to earlier.

She gets onto her knees and starts to push up and actually gets to her feet -

“OH SHIT WAIT WATCH OUT!” she hears from a panicked JJ, and has no clue what he’s yelling about.  
  
\- Until it’s too late.

Lena’s board is knocked clean out from under her feet before the victory of a proper rise and she feels strong wet hands grip her hips briefly, before she sees a body flying over her, and she’s pulled towards the water by the momentum, which could have been so much worse had the person not self-sacrificed and launched themselves through the air over her in order to spare a full impact.

_WHOOSH_ \- she hits the water hard and feels the next wave add insult to injury by making her briefly feel like she’s in a washing machine. She somehow manages to find her bearings and plant her feet and push upright -

Only for her huge board to bob up and then come flying down at her - but again she’s spared by a strong arm blocking it from striking her in the head.

“Watch out!” comes the deep, protective feminine voice.

Lena coughs a little and wipes her face and a blurred image finally comes into view. A familiar blue bikini and olive skin. It’s the blonde woman. She’s got a strong grip on Lena’s upper arm to steady her.

“You okay? You dropped right in on me, I’m sorry-“

Lena finishes wiping her eyes and face. “Em -“ she tries, unable to form words, as she’s now face to face in the water with the woman she’d previously been ogling.

And wow - up close is even better than from afar. Her deep blue eyes are somehow made cerulean in the sunlight. Her lips are full as she’s breathing hard and licking them. There’s a small scar on her forehead Lena finds herself wondering about. And her neck strains as she reaches again to control Lena’s long board, no regard for her own smaller one which is currently floating away behind her.

“You speak English?” the blonde tries, frowning slightly.

“What? Yes? Sorry - I - was disoriented.” she finally musters.

“Oh, kay. Thought maybe you were a European tourist. We get a lot of ‘em around here.”

“Well I am part Irish.” Lena blurts, pointlessly, allowing her slight accent to slip out.

A beat passes between them as the blonde holds back a smile over this random info. 

“Yeah - I caught the accent.” She smiles now, almost laughing at Lena, but not in a mocking way. She’s simply humored by the unusual exchange.

“Hey!” JJ suddenly interrupts - pushing the blonde’s board towards her and grabbing for the long board.

“Sorry ‘bout that Kara, my bad.” he says to the blonde with a nervous smile on his face and eyes wide in what Lena can swear is - awe?

“All good, man. Thanks.” she says as they exchange boards.

“Lucky it wasn’t one ‘a them.” she says nodding to some other locals catching waves nearby, who look far less friendly as they practically fight each other for waves.

“Right?” JJ laughs.

And with that, the woman - Lena now knows is named Kara, nods her way, giving her a look that’s a little too lingering to go unnoticed.

She then climbs up onto her board and now Lena gets another view as she paddles away - Kara’s wetsuit was fully gone and she’s instead just wearing a very small, skin tight pair of boy shorts that have ridden way up between her muscled thighs and - Lena is frozen again at the sight. For someone so slim she had such a thick - 

_SMACK_ \- Lena's knocked upside the head by a wave, literally splashed right out of her embarrassingly obvious lusting. She recovers quick, once again forced to wipe the burn from her eyes.

“I know, right.” JJ laughs, having witnessed the humiliating display. Lena turns to look at him, fully caught and unsure what to say to cover. He just grins, looking from her towards Kara who swims further away. 

“You know that’s Kara Danvers, right?”

She frowns. _Is she supposed to know that name?_

“She’s a legend.” He explains, “For so. Many. Reasons.” finishes with a lustful stare.

Off Lena’s look of discomfort, he thinks he’s offended her. “Not- not to objectify…” he clears his throat, and quickly adds on, “She ruled the circuit for like six years. She’s retired now, mostly just mentors up and comers like Ruby.” he nods towards the girl on the beach.

“Retired? She’s so young -“

“Ah yeah man, she had this nasty wipe out, it totally -“

“LENA!!!!” Sam’s squeal suddenly pierces the air, interrupting. 

She turns to see Sam on her feet on a board nearby, all the girls around her cheering as she rides a wave clumsily while wobbling and unsteady. It’s not pretty - but she does it, until she finally falls right over while mid-cheer.

Lena smiles and claps for her. 

“Thank you, for the lesson. And - your discretion.” she says, nodding awkwardly as she makes her way towards her friends. He realizes what she means. No skin off his back. He just shrugs and “All good. Thanks for not bein’ pissed I dropped you in her wave.” he laughs and she finds herself realizing she wasn’t pissed at all. She was grateful. Grateful because it meant she got to meet her. Sort of.

Lena turns and glances over her shoulder as Kara catches another wave and this time rides it successfully, without interruption. And it’s a sight to behold and she even does a few extra cut backs. She’s a bit of a show off, but based on her vibe earlier she can’t imagine it’s from ego. She’s just that good. And that strong - Lena remembers, the feel of her hands on her hips, even though it was for a fraction of a second. The way she sacrificed herself and pulled off avoiding nailing Lena with her full body was not only heroic - it was hot as hell. And the fact she wasn’t at all upset with Lena, even though she caused the whole thing - intrigued her to no end.

She found herself wanting to know more about the blonde beauty. And she knew the sooner she could get back to the beach, back to her phone - she’d do just that. And so she dragged herself through the shallow water towards the shore.

Lena had no idea that Kara was now watching her head to the beach.

Kara Danvers sits upright on her board, legs at each side, floating in the calm waters as she watches the woman’s pale hips swayed to and fro as she rejoined her friends.

She’d been struck by piercing green eyes the moment they’d managed to open. She was grateful she hadn’t hurt her. Even more grateful she’d gotten to exchange a few brief words. However awkward the woman had been. And when she heard her friend call her name, Lena, she was grateful she knew it. There was something about the curvy, raven-haired Lena that intrigued her. She couldn’t quite put a finger on it. But there’d been something that had passed between them however briefly they’d spoken. Something that excited her. Kara liked that she made Lena nervous, she had to admit. She was used to having that effect on people. Guys. Girls. Didn’t matter. But the way she’d made the stunning woman stutter and blurt something about being Irish - Kara couldn’t help but smile.

The problem was - she’d recently sworn she’d not engage a tourist ever again, in that way. She’d learned her lesson on that, more than once. The last two times especially - it only lead to heartbreak. For them, not her. And it made her feel terrible. Kara never found herself getting close to anybody. She just wasn’t the type to fall in love easily. Or, at all. She would hook up. She would hang out. But forming a deeper bond just wasn’t in her blood. Losing her parents young. Being adopted. Finding a passion in a profusely dangerous, highly competitive sport that took her all over the world - it never really created an environment that was conducive to attachments. Parties and hookups, sure. But long-term relationships, not so much. So the last two times she broke hearts by her encounters catching feels in situations she looked at as purely casual, it had made her feel terrible. And she hated making people feel terrible. Making people smile was her favorite thing in the world, after surfing. So she vowed to not engage in any more trysts with tourists. No matter how attractive they were.

Which is why she found herself frustrated with the fact that she was currently staring after one. Kara suddenly laughs at herself and shakes her head. She figures she’ll probably never see her again anyway.

“Kara!” Ruby suddenly hollers from shore, waving at her as she’s picked up by her grandmother who’s just pulled up by the road nearby. Kara gives her a waving shaka and yells back “Tuesday!” and Ruby nods and gives a thumbs up in response.

And when Kara looks back and sees Lena climbing into a Mercedes van, she now knows for sure not to mess with her, even if she did ever see her again. Because even worse than bedding a tourist - was bedding a wealthy tourist. They always thought they could throw money and gifts at her, not knowing she’d accumulated her own financial independence from years of victories and sponsorships. Especially when they saw her home, her tiny beach shack which always lead to shocked and even repulsed expressions and offers to instead go back to their fancy hotel, which she’d always declined. Because these people were on her turf, not the other way around. And she’d let them know it once they hit the bedroom.

Ironically, the next morning they’d often be left begging to stay. One woman had even offered to leave the husband Kara hadn’t realized she had, a confession uttered as the woman had struggled to catch her breath in afterglow. Saying she’d leave it all behind for someone who could do _that_ to her so many times. Kara had immediately climbed out of bed and despite the woman’s desperate protests and pleas, told tell her to go home to her husband and figure her shit out and not drag other people into her marriage problems. And the last guy she’d been with had offered to buy her a house. An actual freaking house. If only she’d agree to see him every time he was in town and “do _that_” again. The kind of people who threw money at what they wanted never appealed to Kara. At all. She usually only gave in to them in the first place due to a combination of alcohol and needing to scratch an itch after bumping into them at a bar, party or event which her friends had insisted she'd come to.

But Kara wasn’t one for excess or appearances. She was a woman of the Earth. She lived and breathed ocean life and the beach was and always would be her home, now and forever. Most people couldn’t understand that, and so she found herself alone most of the time. Especially now that she’d resolved to avoid hookups with tourists like Lena. Despite her beautiful name and piercing eyes and sharp features and curvy hips and large, perfectly round - _nope_. Not going there.

Kara silenced her own thoughts by dropping backwards off her board into the water.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI "haole" is a term for person who is not a native Hawaiian, especially a white person.

Lena was beyond frustrated to find her phone dead on the way back to the hotel. So much for her deep dive into Kara… _into who she was_, she quickly corrected of her own wandering mind.

As the van bumped along, she found herself growing more and more anxious. 

“Hey has anyone ever heard of Kara Danvers? She’s a - champion surfer?” she suddenly asks as if she’s unsure.

Sam starts to nod as Lucy’s head tilts, considering.

“Uh, I think so! Isn’t she that hot blonde? I thought she died.”

“W-she didn’t _die_, Lucy.” Lena corrects.

“Why do you ask?” Sam chuckles glancing between the two as she texts Jack some combo of annoyingly mushy emojis.

“Oh, em - JJ mentioned she lives near here. I thought maybe she might be a good story for our next issue.”

“For a high fashion magazine?” Sam asks now, finding it odd.

“We’re looking to expand our audience base. You know - evolve or die.” Lena shrugs.

“Which I _swear_ I thought she did.” Lucy laughs.

“Could I use your phone, Sam, I’d like to-“ Lena tries, reaching over.

“Work?” Sam pulls her phone back, “Uh - no. Hell no. Sorry. Not gonna happen.”

Off Lena’s frown -

“I refuse to let you ruin this trip for yourself. You work three hundred and whatever other days of the year, Lena Luthor. For this week, and this week only - you are on vacation. You are to eat, drink, and help me be married. Alright?”

“And maybe get laid.” Lucy chimes in.

Sam gives Lucy a ‘shut up’ look.

“What? She said you don’t get - out, much.” Lucy tries to defend herself by pinning it on Sam.

With that, Lena sends a glare Sam’s way.

“I do fine, thank you.” Lena lies.

Sam watches Lena out of the corner of her eye, a twinge of sympathy on her face until -

“JJ seems like he’d do fine.” Lucy suddenly says with a sly grin.

The van erupts in hoots and whistles.

And Lena again buckles up for another long ride.

———

Lena sits in her towel, fresh from the shower, hair drying over one pinked shoulder as she stares at her laptop screen. She clicks through endless footage of Kara Danvers in competition. And as expected - she’s incredible. It’s everything Lena saw on the beach, but taken to the next level. A highly competitive, ridiculously impressive and notably _dangerous_ level.

She watches as Kara is towed by a jetski into massive waves for training - well over over 50 feet high. She then watches as she skillfully rides similarly large waves in tournaments, the huge green and blue force barreling down upon her, threatening to collapse with her inside - but she somehow stays in perfect position and pops out like a rocket as the crowds go wild. Lena's never seen anything like it. How anyone can be that brave and honestly that insane - is beyond her.

Lena notices the next video is from a Billabong photoshoot. She clicks. Light music plays as Kara poses for the camera while wearing designer ripped jeans that hang loose on her hips and a Billabong logo tee rolled at the sleeves to show off toned arms. Lena shifts in her seat, telling herself this is for educational purposes only - even if the line to Sam in the van was a lie and she knew it.

She finds herself smiling slightly, because as with surfing, Kara’s a natural model. Her confidence exudes through the screen and the camera obviously loves her. And that warm smile is enough to light a room.

The video ends and another auto plays, this time a black and white behind the scenes look at another shoot for a popular entertainment magazine and - Lena suddenly finds herself unable to swallow again.

Kara, complete with a much more stoic vibe now wears a somewhat form-fitting women’s tuxedo - without a shirt under the black jacket, so the neckline plunges all the way to her navel, a gloriously teasing, toned, tan v-formation. Kara adjusts a bit and tilts her head back a little, chin up as if challenging the camera, her long hair flowing perfectly from a small wind machine and Lena notes how there’s an inherent swag to her poses. She’s somehow the perfect balance of feminine and masculine at the same time. And Lena is absolutely entranced.

Her charging phone suddenly buzzes and she’s both irritated by and grateful for the distraction.

“ETA 30” reads in capital letters with sushi and champagne glass emojis. Everyone in group responds quick. Lena just sets the phone back down.

That’s when she notices a new video suggestion to the side of the screen.

“KARA DANVERS NEAR DEATH” followed by “KARA DANVERS DEADLY WIPE OUT” and “WORST SURFING ACCIDENTS” all stare her in the face. Lena frowns and hovers the pointer over the second one which seems the best quality - then hesitates.

She wants to click. But after several frozen seconds, she just can’t bring herself to do it. Sure, she might’ve just been borderline stalking Kara Danvers, even surprised to find that despite the endless YouTube content posted about her by other users, Kara herself actually had no social media - a welcome rarity in today’s world. But there’s something invasive about watching whatever this incident was that forced her young retirement. And if she’s being honest - it scares her. And she can’t figure out why. She doesn’t even know this woman. How she could feel so frightened to see her harmed confused the hell out of her.

Lena shakes her head and chastises herself as just being silly about all of this in the first place. Since she’d likely never see Kara Danvers again - none of this mattered.

She shuts the computer and instead focuses on getting ready.

All she’d been told was they were going out for a ‘nice dinner’.

So Lena quickly decides on a little makeup with a cute sleeveless jumpsuit, pulling her hair up into a casual bun.

——-

When Lena emerges from the elevator into the lobby and Sam turns and spots her -

“Okay don’t be mad.”

Lena stops in her tracks, knowing any time those are Sam’s first words, she’s in for something unpleasant.

Sam quickly pulls Lena aside as her mouth drops when she notices Lucy and the girls -standing next to two of the surf instructors from earlier. They’re dressed casually and have huge grins as they tease and flirt with the girls._ Oh no…_

“Sam, what are they doing here?”

“So yeah about dinner - weeee’re gonna go to a party instead.”

“Wh- Sam! I haven’t eaten all day!”

“They said there might be food.” Sam tries.

“Might be? Sam. Come on, I’m not dressed for -“

“You look amazing, girl. We all do. Look I know we had plans, but - hey, I’m about to start a new life so I’m trying to be fun. And how we have that fun is… tbd. So I am nothing if not flexible. I mean how do you think I got Jack to marry me.” Sam says with a sly wink.

Lena sinks, much too tired and hungry for a party, but trying to avoid hurting Sam. Sam picks up on the hesitance. She hates to force her, so -

“Lena, if you don’t wanna go, you don’t have to. We don’t have to. I’ll send the guys on their way and we’ll go eat sushi and sip mai tais as planned. But, Lena, _honey_, how great would it be to cut loose? For real? Meet the locals. Soak up the flavor of real island life with real island people.”

“Island people, Sam, really?”

“Okay that came off more offensive than intended. But you know what I mean. Come on. Please.”

Lena’s conflicted. Sam knows it.

“They said JJ might be there…” she tries, despite knowing it probably won’t sway Lena. 

As if Lena didn’t need another reason NOT to go, now the guy who saw her shamelessly lusting after Kara Danvers could be in attendance.

Sam anxiously awaits Lena’s answer, a tentative and hopeful smile on her face.

——-

_THUMP THUMP THUMP_ \- the music hits Lena’s starving, sun-blasted head before she even steps inside.

The place was pretty small, but jam-packed with people. Mostly locals. Lena, Sam, Lucy and the others stuck out like sore thumbs in their semi-casual dinner attire. Many of the local guys were shirtless. The girls wore skirts or shorts and bikini tops. Everyone looked like they literally just walked in off the beach, which Lena figures they probably did.

What strikes her most is the age diversity of the partygoers. A couple guys look like they’re in their 40s, grizzled older surfer types, one of them with what was obviously his wife on his arm. A group of people they pass on the way in look like they’re only teenagers, barely older than maybe sixteen. Then there was everyone in between. And all of them just mixed, mingled, drank and danced together with abandon.

She couldn’t help but notice how everyone here seemed ridiculously happy. It was nothing but smiles, laughter and fun everywhere she looked. And the bodies… it’s as if practically everyone was ripped and tan.

Lena had never felt more pale and Irish.

The girls tried a few times to drag her into a group for dancing. Lena slightly wiggled - barely. She just nodded along mostly, not being one for dancing in public. She was self-aware enough that she wasn’t the kind to cut loose and it could be annoying to friends. She hated being that person. That “stick in the mud” friend everyone had to force to do anything. But it’s not that she was ‘square’ or ‘lame’ as she was so often called in her youth, she just always struggled to fit in… anywhere. Perks of being a closeted, inactive lesbian from a conservative Irish family who now lived in LA. She was… in between worlds. She’d tried so many times to let loose and fit in with friends in situations like this. It never turned out well. So somewhere along the way, she just stopped trying. Work always gave a great excuse, but here and now she no longer had that go-to.

As Lucy and one of the other women grind with the two instructors, Sam and the other two playfully group dance with each other while mingling and laughing with the locals.

When a couple guys try to slide their way closer to Lena, she suddenly needs air. She politely smiles to them and slips off to the corner of the room to look for food or drink. It’s all alcohol and the ‘food’ is merely a bowl of crumbs that once were chips next to a couple empty pizza boxes. As she reluctantly takes a beer as last resort, Lena truly wants nothing more than to return to the hotel and order a ton of room service. But not wanting to be a killjoy for Sam, she instead makes her way to the large sliding door that leads to a porch. She leans in the doorframe and breathes in the fresh air, staring out at the jungle-y treetops and the ocean which can still barely be seen in the far distance. She’s grateful for the relief from the scent of body sweat and marijuana.

She briefly glances back at her friends and feels a twinge of jealousy at how happy they all seem. That jealousy rises when she spots a stunning, slim, heavily-tattooed, short-haired woman grinding on a Hawaiian girl that looks a lot like the girl who handed her a lei when she arrived…

She can’t help but feel envy at the way they’re able to, like her straight friends, just be themselves so freely.

That’s when she notices the tattooed woman turn and look towards the front door in sudden interest. And that’s when Lena spots perfect natural waves of beach-blonde hair.

Kara Danvers cuts through the crowd wearing a loose white sleeveless top that’s half tucked into tight, ripped black jeans, flip flops and barely there makeup, if any at all - it’s hard to tell. She’s so naturally beautiful.

She’s greeted like a damn rockstar - with smiles, hand shakes, shakas, and bro-hugs. She offers that warm smile in response and engages everyone who engages her. It’s obvious everyone knows her, and everyone loves her.

When the blasting track from the DJ suddenly switches to K Theory’s Remix of Lil Wayne’s “A Milli” and the beat drops hard - someone grabs Kara like she’s not allowed to walk away from it, and she laughs as she’s pulled by a couple local guys right into a dancing group of friends. And despite the fact that she stands out, she somehow fits right in.

The thumping of the bass practically shakes the whole house, vibrating the bamboo floors under Lena’s feet. And she suddenly doesn’t know if it’s the building or her body that’s trembling at the sight of Kara rolling her hips against the hot shirtless guy behind her. His hand slips up under the edge of her shirt to grip tightly at her and she doesn’t seem to mind, nor does Lena because it gives another glimpse at those insane abs, but only a teasing hint that makes Lena swallow hard. It’s odd and intriguing how no one seems to mind close physical contact here. Everyone’s just all over each other and it’s all in good fun. And then the slim tattooed woman with the beautiful face suddenly leaves her own dancing partner and zones in on Kara. Lena watches as the woman steps up to her front and Kara winds up dancing between the tattooed woman and the guy, until the woman pulls her away from the guy a little, pressing their feminine bodies together in an intimate way that makes Lena blush watching it, and so she looks away briefly.

When she can’t help herself and looks back, she sees Kara licking her lips and shaking her head slightly, avoiding eye contact with the tattooed woman as if there’s a familiarity there that maybe Kara’s trying to avoid. Lena watches the woman’s hands on Kara’s hips and feels a jealous swell, especially when Kara’s veined fingers grip the woman’s hands briefly - until it’s not for the reason she thinks. She’s surprised when Kara instead slips out of the woman’s grasp and returns focus on her other friends, further working herself through the crowd, leaving the tattooed woman looking disappointed.

“That was Kate.” JJ’s voice knocks her from her stare as he takes position next to Lena.

“I’m sorry?” she asks, trying to pretend she wasn’t creeping.

“Short hair? Kate Kane. She’s like an addict and Kara - is her drug’a choice. Always wants another hit.”

“Another?” Lena asks, doing her best not to sound too caring.

“Once is all it took. Kara has that effect on people. Like I said. Legend. She ain’t just the goat at ridin’ waves.” he laughs with a wink.

“So that’s… something she does often then?”

“Not as often as you’d think. But enough. It’s a small island. People talk. Yo, it’s funny as hell though - seein’ those rich-ass haoles left BEGGIN.” he takes a swing of his beer before glancing up and down Lena quick enough to not be offensive, “You’d have a shot ya know, if you wanted to. No offense on the wealthy tourist shit, and you can’t help bein’ haole, but I mean - you’re hot.”

“Uh, thank you? But I - I’m not… I’m not -“ she tries to say. To form the right word, any word -_ interested, gay, looking_ \- but nothing comes out, because she certainly can’t. Instead -

“I was just curious. She… seems like an interesting person.”

“Yo she’s the best. I mean she got mad game, yeah. But she’s like legit too, you know? She a real one. Not some haole poser, you know. Despite the caucasity.” he laughs.

“Well no one’s perfect.” Lena jokes and he cracks up.

“Yo you’re funny. Yeah, you’d definitely have a shot.”

“No, thank you. Again, I’m not…“ she says, taking a quick sip to distract from the awkwardness.

He squints. Based on everything he’s seen he knows she’s not being authentic. And she knows he doesn’t buy it. And she’s grateful when he doesn’t push.

“I’ma go dance now. I’d ask you to join, but I get the feeling it’d be a hard no. Your girls on the other hand…“ he grins one last time, lifting a beer her way before making a beeline straight for Sam’s other friends.

Lena turns away from the scene fully now and stares out to the horizon. She takes a step further, reaching up to let her hair down before she leans forward against the balcony railing, closing her eyes as she takes a breath, inhaling the natural scents of the plush trees and the remnants of an earlier brief rain.

Suddenly - a whiff of something else hits her. It’s lovely and oddly comforting. A combination of - salt water, sun, and… _coconut_? With maybe a hint vanilla? Her brow furrows and she opens her eyes just as -

“Hey.” a familiar voice speaks low, almost raspy.

Deep blues reflect in the bright moonlight as Kara Danvers now stands right next to her, looking at her deeply, a hint of curiosity in her gaze.

Kara can’t believe she’d approached Lena. Just a couple minutes prior, she’d noticed her standing by the door while she was dancing. She had immediately, almost instinctually untangled herself from Kate the moment she’d seen Lena, which had struck her as odd right after. Sure, Kate had just been a fun time one drunken night and she had no desire to continue to engage her, especially given Kate’s often desperate antics towards her, but why she’d pulled away as soon as she saw Lena, Kara couldn’t figure out.

_No. More. Tourists._ Kara had reminded herself as she danced on with other friends. _Wealthy_ tourists especially, she repeated again and again as her friends surrounded her with bodies and laughter. Still - all she could see or think about was the woman in the doorway across the room. How nice she looked in her expensive jumpsuit. The pink hue of slightly sun burned shoulders and cheeks against otherwise porcelain skin that seemed to glow in the moonlight. And then when she’d pulled her hair down from that bun and loose raven hair cascaded down as she stepped out towards the railing - Kara was drawn from the crowd by a force beyond her control. And before she knew it - she was breaking her own rule.

“Recognize a fellow loner when I see one.” Kara follows up right after ‘hey’.

Lena’s full lips part in surprise. And Kara can’t help but glance down at them. And Lena sees and she shifts, immediately looking away - because there’s no way Kara would be interested in her, despite JJ’s claims. _Would she?_

_No. No she wouldn’t._ Lena reasoned. And even if she did - Lena would never. Could never. She can lust from afar but that was all it could be. Like always. So instead, as she avoids eye contact -

“Loner?” Lena somehow manages to choke out, swallowing down her nerves and doing her best not to humiliate herself like she did in the water earlier.

“You seem the furthest thing from a loner.” Lena jokes, nodding towards the crowd.

“Oh, well, they’re just my friends.”

“Which ones?” Lena asks curiously.

“Pick one.” Kara shrugs with a smile.

“You’re friends with _everyone_?” Lena chuckles, still unable to look Kara in the eyes, instead peering down and fiddling with the neck of her bottle.

“I was born here. It’s a small island.”

Lena’s mind immediately reverts back to her earlier convo with JJ.

“So I’m told.” she finally says.

Kara tilts her head down a little and bends her knees, forcing Lena to make eye contact.

“Hey.”

And when green meets blue, Lena feels her legs go weak. And it’s like Kara knows she’s forced Lena past a wall she’d put up, by forcing her to make eye contact. It’s like she knows the effect she has on Lena and she’s using it to her advantage.

The longest beat of silence passes between them.

And Kara just stares at her, with a light but serious look on her face as if she’s trying to read her soul. And Lena’s trapped in it. She can’t look away. She can’t move. This is possibly the most intimate, longest silent eye contact she’s ever had with anyone. And somehow it’s not awkward at all. And when Kara takes a very slight step closer - Lena’s breath catches.

But Kara just glances down at Lena’s beer -

“That’s a terrible choice.”

“I’m sorry?” Lena exhales barely.

Kara gestures to the bottle with a slight smirk.

“Oh! Em… it was all they had. Seemed like a good idea at the time, but yes - it’s awful. Just needed something. Anything. Haven’t eaten all day. And - wheat.” Lena immediately regrets the random ramble.

_It’s “I’m part Irish” all over again._

But Kara jumps in before she can’t hate herself too much -

“You’re hungry?”

Lena’s grateful for the assist. And the surprisingly concerned tone in Kara’s voice. But considering how protective she was in the water today, maybe it’s not all that surprising...

“It’s been a long day. I’ve not eaten since the plane this morning. Feeling a bit jet-lagged, to be honest.”

“And you came to a house party?”

“My - best friend Sam’s getting married on Sunday. We’re having this big bachelorette _week o’ fun_.” the last part comes out more sarcastic than intended and Kara picks up on it, her head tilting back as she gets that Lena’s definitely not having fun of any kind.

“Is it that obvious?” Lena asks.

“What?” Kara asks, stifling a grin.

“That I’m having a truly terrible time.”

“Only a little.” Kara says now with that warm grin that makes Lena’s heart swell. She catches herself and looks away again.

And again it’s like Kara knows she’s holding back and doesn’t want her to -

“I know a place. They’re open late. Best poi on the island.”

Lena freezes up. She swallows and shakes her head.

“Em, Kara… I feel like maybe you’ve gotten the wrong idea.”

Kara’s eyes squint slightly, listening intently as she waits. But Lena can’t figure out what to say next. Or maybe she just can’t bring herself to fully say it.

“And what idea is that?” Kara finally says, her tone dropping to one that’s a little too low and suggestive for Lena to handle without flushing head to toe.

And in her heated reaction, something brazen comes out of her mouth from absolutely nowhere -

“I’m not just some random haole tourist looking to be another notch on the bedpost of the local hero.” she challenges, the bravery coming more from self preservation and fear than anything.

Kara’s eyebrows raise in surprise. There’s a silent beat as Lena wonders how she’ll react. Finally -

“Who taught you haole?” She asks with a breaking grin.

_That’s it? That’s her reaction? Questioning the vocabulary she’d used, as opposed to Lena’s brazen rebuffing?_

It’s almost as if Kara didn’t believe her. And when Kara crosses her arms and those biceps are on full display now, Lena wishes she could take it all back and just say -

“_Fuck me_.” Kara sighs suddenly and Lena loses what little color she has. Until she realizes Kara’s peering past her.

Lena turns to see what she’s looking at. Or more precisely, what she’s _frowning_ at.

It’s Lena’s friends. They're at the railing on the other side of the balcony - peering down at the cans of soda and beer they’d knocked off the railing. They cackle a drunken ‘oops’.

“Hey!” Kara practically barks at them.

“What are you doin?” she finishes as she steps past Lena. And suddenly Lena realizes Kara’s annoyed.

“It was an accident.” Lucy laughs, not thinking anything serious.

“Great, you gonna go pick it up?”

“W-yeah, we will absolutely.” Sam says, detecting the blonde’s disapproving tone and feeling terrible. She nudges a stubborn Lucy who can’t believe this random confrontation is happening over a couple pieces of dropped trash.

“Sure. Yeah. Sorry for offending you.” Lucy says with a defensive hands up.

“It’s not about me, it’s about the island.”

“Okay…” Lucy says with a shrug, unsure what to say to that.

That’s when Sam notices Lena standing behind Kara. Realizes they were talking and -

“Oh my gosh, you’re Kara Danvers.”

She then smacks Lucy on the arm.

“Lucy, this is Kara Danvers.”

“Oh shit you _aren’t_ dead.” Lucy slurs.

Now Kara’s hands come to her hips and her head tilts oddly as Lucy takes a step closer. 

“Wow you’re even hotter in person. I mean you’re a little weirdly intense about littering, but damn - okay. Okay, I get it now.” Lucy says staring at Kara before glancing to Lena, “She _would_ be good for your magazine, Lena.”

Kara turns and looks at Lena curiously.

She pushes past the embarrassment and somehow manages - “Kara was just telling me about this poi place that’s open late…“

She’s just looking for an out, unsure what she’s even really agreeing to. But she knows she needs to cover with Kara for the magazine reference. And Kara still looks confused as she and Lena lock eyes again and something of a question lingers between them now.

Sam glances from Lena to Kara, noting the awkwardness and tension. And that’s when it washes over her now. An unexpected realization. And suddenly - _so_ many things over the last ten years she’s known Lena make sense. And she feels absolutely awful for never knowing before. Never even _asking_.

“Oh I love poi!” Lucy suddenly starts, but Sam grabs her arm.

“No!” Sam’s blurting reaction is drunkenly overblown and she knows it. She covers quickly, “Uh, Lucy - you’ve got trash to pick up and I wanna stay here anyway, I’m having fun.”

Before Lucy can protest or push more -

“Lena you should go. Get some - poi. We’ll see you at brunch tomorrow.”

“Ohhh brunch. Mimosas. _Yas_.” Lucy says, daydreaming of more tasty alcohol as the girls laugh and Sam drags them towards the stairs to go retrieve their dropped cans.

Sam pushes them onward before lingering behind a moment, glancing back and offering Lena quick wave and nod.

“Have fun.” she says cheerfully and hopeful, before following the girls down the stairs as she shakes her head at herself and wonders how she never caught on until now.

And just as quickly as they were interrupted -

Kara and Lena are alone once again.

Kara leans a hand to the rail and looks at her. “Magazine?” she finally asks.

“Poi?” is all Lena can muster in response.

——-


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God bless poi.

Lena follows Kara down the short street leading away from the house. They approach a late 70s model Jeep that’s been fully restored to pristine condition.

Kara opens the passenger door for her. It’s a minor gesture, but one that doesn’t go unnoticed by Lena. She offers a polite smile and nervously climbs in.

“It’s not far.” Kara assures her, as if that’s why Lena’s nervous.

Kara climbs up and starts the car - the engine has a low, barely audible hum.

“Wait is that-“

“Electric. Had it converted last year. Cost more than the car itself.” They share a chuckle, and off they go.

The wind flows in their hair as they zip across a long stretch of road. Lena tries not to look over. _Really_ hard. Her eyes dart to the side a little and she catches Kara looking over at her. Kara has a slight curl to her lips.

“What?” Lena asks.

Kara just licks her lips and shakes her head, laughing slightly at her own self-

“Nothing.” she says finally, and resumes focus on the road.

They eventually pull off to a side dirt trail that leads deeper into a small clearing tucked amidst tall trees.

When they arrive, Lena is immediately taken by how intimate this place is. A large silver trailer sits surrounded by six wooden picnic tables. White lights are strung up amidst the trees, creating a comforting glow to the location that’s accented by a few tiki lamps to keep bugs away. And a young couple snuggles closely at one of the tables while enjoying a late meal together.

As Kara kills the engine and climbs out - Lena can’t believe how quiet and peaceful and beautiful it is here. Between the soft mood lighting and the light strum of ukulele music playing from a speaker by the food truck - it’s incredible. It's _romantic_.

“KD!” A warm voice booms as a middle aged man with kind eyes pops his head from the trailer window, a truly contagious smile on his face at the sight of Kara.

“Hey Ano! How you doin' brother?”

“Life is beautiful. Always. We live.” he says with arms out for effect. 

Kara smiles, and suddenly a white dog comes bursting out of the trailer and excitedly jumps against Kara.

“Haukea!” she gives her a kiss and playful petting, before the dog turns to Lena and hesitantly smells Lena’s feet - then leaps on her too.

“OH!” Lena blurts from the sweet attack.

Kara laughs.

“She likes you.”

“Haukea!” the man snaps at the dog in lighthearted admonishment for accosting his guest.

The dog obeys and backs off Lena, before sniffing her way off and disappearing around the back of the trailer.

“How’s that poi tonight? I promised my friend here it’s the best.”

Lena notes her use of ‘friend’. She’s certain it’s just Kara being polite.

“_How’s the poi?_ Ono! Always ono!” the man says with a humored shake of his head as if she’s crazy to even ask.

“You like salmon or pork?” Kara asks Lena.

“Emmm…” Lena considers, unsure which she’d prefer now.

“You know what, you should try both. Hey let’s do the Kalua and Lomi.”

“And your usual?”

“Yes, please.”

“Pineapple and lilikoi?” he asks of the sides.

“Of course.” Kara scoffs as if _he’s_ crazy to ask, “_Always pineapple and lilikoi_.”

He points at her and shakes his finger humorously, getting the joke.

Lena can’t help but notice the way people respond to Kara. It’s like she’s just a beacon of light, and everyone is drawn in.

A moment later, Kara’s taking the two small containers of food from the man. No money is exchanged, so she figures - _maybe Kara has a tab?_ Kara nods to what he hands over next and Lena helps by taking the two beers from him.

Kara coolly swings a leg over a bench and takes a seat as Lena slips in opposite of her.

It’s only now that Lena notices Kara’s plate, with small squares next to her poi and fruit.

“Is that-“

“Tofu poke.”

“You don’t eat meat?”

“Nah, I’m vegan.”

“Oh I feel terrible making you order this for me.” she says of the pork and salmon in front of her.

“Why?”

“Just - seems obnoxious.”

“I don’t judge. To each their own.”

Lena finds this attitude refreshing. Most vegans she knows in LA are much less forgiving and will scoff and admonish her anytime she orders meat in their presence. Somehow, Kara’s accepting attitude makes her actually entertain the thought of going Vegan for the first time in her life.

She bravely reaches a fork forward and stabs a square, snatching it right off Kara’s plate, popping it into her mouth.

Kara’s eyes shoot up the way they did when Lena had earlier challenged her. She gets the feeling people don’t challenge or surprise Kara very often, and she rather likes being someone who does.

“Wow. _Bold_. Fingers have been lost stealing from my plate.” Kara jokes.

“Lesser men.” Lena shrugs with a raised eyebrow.

Kara stares at her for a moment as Lena suddenly sinks into the bite, the bravado fading, replaced by a close-eyed foodgasm. “Oh my God…” she says before then scooping a heap of the purple poi from her own plate and - “OH. My. _GOD_.” she says eyes closing once again, savoring it. Maybe it’s because she’s starving, or the atmosphere, or the company, but it might just be the best thing she’s ever tasted.

Kara just watches her, a smile teasing at her own lips again. She realizes suddenly just how much she loves watching Lena’s reactions to - well, anything. And everything. The endearing startle when the dog pounced on her as if surprised she’d like her. The thorough enjoyment of the food Kara wanted her to taste. Of _her_ food, even. Indeed, Kara wasn’t one who was surprised or challenged often, let alone intrigued. But here she was, now, with Lena. Because despite Lena’s occasionally awkward nerves, there was a confidence buried inside of her. Yeah, she liked making Lena nervous. She liked the way her breath caught when Kara had stepped closer on the balcony. But even more than that, she liked that Lena had layers. That deep down there was someone confident and capable under all that blushing and stuttering. There had to be, she figured. Lena was clearly successful in - whatever it was she did for a living. And the way she’d challenged her twice now only added to her theory. And Kara’s interest.

And when Lena licks her lips, Kara’s eyes go a little dark as she pops open a beer.

The sound causes Lena’s eyes to reopen.

“Sorry, how long was I gone?” Lena laughs at herself as Kara extends the beer she’d popped open with her bare hands.

Kara just smiles as Lena takes the beer, their hands briefly touching. Lena feels an electricity in the touch, and she can’t help but watch in a daze as Kara then uses those strong, rough paws to pop her own bottle cap open next, veins in her hands and forearms flexing in a quick, brief strain that isn’t even hardly a strain for her.

“Don’t apologize. I love a woman who loves her food.” Kara jokes as she then digs into her own plate.

And Lena pauses, swallowing harder than expected as she tries to quench her thirst with a sip of the beer. Those words have put her back on alarm. She’s suddenly left wondering what the hell she thinks she’s doing. She’s _flirting_ with this woman. And this woman is flirting back. And Lena knows she’ll never allow herself to act on it.

But when Kara raises a slice of pineapple to her lips and she hears the squishy sound as the juice runs down her chin, suddenly that resolution is challenged. And again the fear rises.

Lena peers down at the bottle instead.

“This is a much better beer.” she forces out.

“Well yeah, it’s a Kona.” Kara says, matter of fact.

She wipes the juice away with a napkin and then looks at Lena more intensely.

“So what’s this about a magazine?”

“Oh - that was… nothing. They’re… I’m editor and chief for a digital fashion magazine, and I had mentioned to my friends that I thought you might be good for our next issue. But, I’m not so sure.”

“Ouch. Okay.”

“Oh no - it's not you. Just the issue itself. It was more a… I was just trying to…”

Kara waits, eyebrow raised curiously.

“Trying to what?”

Lena finally sighs.

“I... had asked if they knew who you were. After we’d met on the beach. And-“

“You were asking about me? You _are_ bold.”

Lena’s mouth drops, humored at _Kara’s_ boldness.

“I was just curious about my knight in shining sunscreen.” she jests with a shrug.

“Mm.”

“You could have plowed right into me.”

Kara’s head tilts.

Lena goes pale, face dropping when she realizes how that sounded.

“We when were wet.”

Lena’s eyes go wider at herself. _Where are these words even coming from?_

Kara holds back a grin.

“On the boards. In the water.” Lena finally manages. She pushes past, quicker, “You could have knocked me over. And you didn’t. And then you prevented what I can only assume would have certainly been a concussion from that behemoth of a surfboard. And JJ said something about you being a famous surfer. And I was curious. _That’s all_.”

She finishes a lot more confident and firm than she started. It’s all a bluff anyway. She wants to know everything about Kara. She wants to know about that scar on her forehead and if it has something to do with the accident. She wants to know about that accident. She wants to know how Kara got started surfing. Why she chose such a dangerous sport. She wants to know about Kara’s family and her entire history and who she is -

“So it was JJ huh.” Kara challenges suddenly, snapping Lena from her internal rambling.

Lena looks at her oddly.

“Who told you about me. And my 'many conquests’.”

_Uh oh._ Lena shifts. Stuffs a mouthful of poi to avoid having to speak, instead grunting something indiscernible with a shrug.

“JJ exaggerates. Just so you know.” Kara says.

Lena listens, though she currently avoids eye contact.

“People like to talk, and most of it is bullshit. But, I’ll admit, when I have an itch - I do scratch.”

Lena swallows hard at the thought. And, she can’t help but be envious of such freedom, as Kara continues -

“It’s just… who I am. I don’t like to deny myself. Life’s too short to be Magic Wand-ing _yourself_ every night.”

Lena practically chokes on her next bite of poi.Kara notices.

“No offense.” she teases Lena, taking an almost cocky swig of her beer.

Lena finally looks at her again.

“I- I don’t do that.” Lena protests.

“Nah, you’re a Rabbit kinda girl.” Kara corrects.

Lena blushes and stares down at her plate. She shifts, trying to regain some shred of dignity and confidence. Her chin tilts up and she shakes her head at the blonde.

“You just don’t even have a filter, do you Kara Danvers?”

“Why would I? Like I said. Life’s too short.”

Something downshifts in Lena suddenly.

“I wish I could be that free.” she says low.

“Why can’t you?” Kara asks, genuinely.

For Lena, that’s a heavy topic. And Kara can tell. Kara puts her beer and fork down and leans forward, elbows against the table as she inquires further.

“Like tonight. You weren’t dancing.”

“No-“ Lena wipes the corner of her mouth and sets her napkin and own fork down now, leaning forward to match. “I wasn’t. I - don’t dance in public. Hell, I don’t dance in private.”

There’s something sad in her tone and she doesn’t want to bring the mood down, so instead she finishes with a smile and jest -

“I’m Irish. I have no rhythm and I am self aware enough not to impart such a disturbing sight upon the world.”

Kara grins. Squints.

“What about for you? Dancing for yourself. Just because it’s fun. Or - shit, even slow dancing with someone you’re into. Because you want to be with them like that. Holding them close. Experiencing a beautiful song with them in your arms. I mean what about your own wedding? You won’t have a first dance?”

Lena struggles to form words now._ Is Kara really talking romance and weddings?_

_It’s just casual conversation_, she reminds herself quickly. Still - it’s a sad topic for Lena.

“I doubt I’ll ever get married.” she finally replies, with barely a shrug.

“Why’s that?” Kara asks curiously.

“Weddings are a place where two people in love declare their eternal commitment in front of friends and family. That’s not a possibility for me.”

Lena can’t even believe how honest she’s just been. But there’s something about the lights and mood and Kara’s deep blue eyes that look at her like she’s the only person in the world right now. Like she genuinely, truly wants to know everything about Lena, and without any judgment - which allows Lena to be this open. More open than she’s ever been with anyone. She looks down now, trying to give herself a second to recover from the rising intimacy of the moment.

Kara however, continues to look at her deeply, studying her. And she forces the sympathy she feels in her heart not to be too obvious, because she doesn’t want Lena to think she pities her. But Kara gets it. She gets fully what Lena is saying, without having to actually say it. She knows Lena’s closeted. And from the way she’s acted around her all day today, she knows it’s because she’s never done this before. Never allowed herself to do this before. And the idea that this beautiful, smart, incredible woman has denied herself for God only knows how long - breaks Kara’s heart. And suddenly she’s not only wanting to throw her no tourist rules out the window for herself - she’s wanting to do it for Lena.

Kara takes a breath and glances around, as the other couple departs for their car and now they’re left alone as Ano is now focused on cleaning up the kitchen in the trailer, ready to close for the night.

Kara suddenly pushes up and steps closer to Lena’s side of the table. Lena looks up at her curiously -

And Kara extends a hand, palm up. And she waits. 

Lena’s brow furrows.

“Let’s break some rules.”

Lena has no idea what she’s talking about as far as Kara’s rules, but she realizes now - she wants her to dance.

“Kara-“

“Stop - thinking so damn much, Lena Luthor.” And with that she curls her first two fingers slightly as if to say cmon.

Lena’s breath catches in her throat. She realizes that by knowing her last name - Kara looked her up too. She _is_ interested in her.

There’s a soft light that appears around Kara as she hovers over Lena, courtesy of the string of lights overhead, dangling from the palm tree behind her. Kara literally looks like an angel. A tanned, buff, gorgeous angel -

Lena’s hand suddenly moves as if on its own, from the table. And before she knows what she’s doing, Kara’s hand is grasping hers and Lena is rising. She notes how Kara’s hands are somehow soft and rough at the same time and the thought makes her tremble a little inside.

And as she’s pulled in closer to Kara’s body - she feels an intense warmth emanating from the blonde, as if she’s her own walking sun. _Maybe this is why she exudes so much light…_

But Lena’s wonderment fades as Kara’s other hand finds her lower back and suddenly their bodies are merely inches apart. And Lena finally allows her other hand to touch Kara, landing at her bare arm, atop a slightly flexing bicep.

Before they can even take a step, Kara intending for them to sway with the strumming ukulele tune -

The music on the speaker abruptly changes._ To Elvis Presley’s “I Can’t Help Falling in Love with You”_.

“Oh my God.” Kara says, eyes closed and head dropping in humored embarrassment. “I’m gonna kill Ano.”

And Lena can’t help but smile at the older gentleman avoiding Kara’s glare by yanking the trailer window shut.

“This wasn’t planned I swear.”

The hilarity of the moment has broken the ice further so Lena finally manages -

“It’s okay. It’s one of my favorite songs. Makes me cry.”

“Yeah me too.” Kara says, a bit more serious than expected, surprised to find they have this in common.

And suddenly they can’t stop looking each other again, and Kara’s fingers curl a bit at her back, almost in a light scratch as if to instigate the beginning of -

A dance.

It’s slow. Cautious.

The two sway together to the melodic, romantic tune as the legendary voice croons.

And then everything melts away and Lena feels as if they’re suddenly the only two people in the world.

And she can’t stop staring at Kara’s lips. She wonders what they’d feel like. What they’d taste like.

And Kara can’t stop staring at hers, wanting desperately to kiss Lena in the way she knows she’s never been kissed.

She swears Kara leans in a bit, but stops herself. Instead blue meets green again. And now somehow they’ve moved closer, their bodies barely, lightly tracing against each other.

“I’m sorry…” Lena suddenly says, barely.

Kara’s brow furrows a little, curiously.

“For the bedpost thing. I never meant to assume.”

Their voices are both low now, barely above a whisper, as if they have a secret between them neither know but desperately want to.

“You weren’t wrong“ Kara says suddenly, shaking her head, to Lena’s surprise.

“At least the part about you.” she begins. “I _do_ want to sleep with you, Lena.”

Lena freezes, despite the music playing on. 

“Badly. I want to break my rules for you. I want to take you back to my bed and make you feel things I suspect you’ve never felt in your life. But I don’t want to make you scream my name, I could do that so. Easily. No, Lena, I want you unable to say my name. Unable to form words. Unable to breathe. I want to make you come. Again. And again. And again, until the sun rises or you fall, whichever happens first.”

Lena’s knees threaten to buckle from from the sheer eroticism of Kara’s bold, raw honesty. But Kara’s grip tightens on her, keeping her upright.

“Thing is - I _know_ you don’t want to just be a notch on my bedpost, but _I’m_ scared you’ll be more... I don’t know anything about you, but I want to. Desperately. And that’s new for me. And maybe you think this is just a line, but -“

“Kiss me.” Lena interrupts, breathlessly.

Kara’s brow furrows again, deeper.

“Kiss me.” Lena repeats again, and it’s almost a plea this time, like Lena can’t kiss Kara first. She can’t bring herself to take that step, _but maybe if Kara does it for her…_

Kara instantly releases Lena’s body and brings both hands to her face, cupping it as she leans in - and their lips meet.

It’s gentle and tentative at first, as Kara tilts up a little and lets her lips slowly drag off of Lena’s - and Lena gasps lightly from the feel of it as they part. And before she can miss the incredible feeling of Kara’s lips on hers - they meet again, more firmly this time as Kara drops one hand and again pulls Lena in closer at her lower back, this time flush against her body.

And _God_… the softness of Kara’s lips on hers combined with the feeling of being held in strong yet feminine arms, chest to chest… _breasts to breasts_. It’s the first time she’s kissed a woman. And it’s like being hungry her entire life and finally getting a taste of real food. And it’s not only nourishing - it’s _glorious_.

After the longest moment, their lips part again, but foreheads and bodies remain close and eyes are still shut.

Kara’s jaw sets and her hand slips from Lena’s cheek to her chest, laying gently against it, just above her cleavage. She can feel Lena’s heart racing. Feel the lack of a rise and fall.

“Breathe, Lena.”

A long, silent beat as Lena’s lips part, but instead -

“I don’t want to.” she barely gasps.

And then Lena’s eyes open and Kara meets her stare, and there’s a fire in Lena’s gaze. It’s deep and dark and _wanting_.

So Kara barely nods, understanding.

And she takes Lena’s hand in hers and leads her away.

And they bypass the jeep and before Lena can question -

They keep walking down the dirt path in silence for a minute, maybe longer, Lena can't tell because time has ceased to exist all of the sudden, until Lena can hear the ocean nearby and she realizes Kara’s place must be close. It must be just down the street, in fact.

And she’s right.

Lena’s pulled forward slowly in the moonlight, stepping to the sounds of crashing waves, closer and closer until it comes into view -

Kara’s beach house. It’s a small bungalow, sat right at the edge of the sand. And despite it’s humble simplicity and age - it’s beautiful. Just like the woman leading her there.

And it all suddenly becomes real when Kara turns and looks at her as she walks backwards, Lena’s hand still in hers, eyes checking, searching Lena's to be sure she's still sure.

And no, Lena is not sure. But she’s also not turning back now. _She’s waited long enough._

So Lena steps past her and pulls Kara forward now.

And Kara’s eyes are drunk with lust as they trace down at the hips swaying towards her bungalow with purpose.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's smut o’clock.

Lena’s eyes trace over the warm but minimal decor hanging off the walls around her. It’s dark, but from the moonlight that shines through the large windows she can still make out the touches of bohemian accents and numerous intriguing statues and cultural items collected from what she can only assume are Kara’s global travels.

The place is small and intimate, basically just a large open studio floorplan. It’s exactly as she would’ve pictured for someone like Kara. And the smell of sandalwood fills the air as she takes a nervous breath. She forces herself to focus on the sights and smells and not on her rising anxiety as she sits at the edge of the bed, waiting briefly.

When they’d entered, Lena had turned to face her and Kara had hovered close, backing Lena in, _leaning_ in - but still not kissing her despite how much Lena hoped she would. It’s like she was stalking her, hunting her, teasing her. Lena had finally reached and pulled Kara against her own body as Kara extended a hand to turn on the lights - but nothing happened, the place remained dark. So she’d muttered something about the breaker being out again and quickly slid out of her flip flops, gesturing to Lena with a nod towards the bed.

Lena had swallowed hard at the sight of Kara’s bed which was perfectly made. Somehow she’d figured it wouldn’t be, considering Kara’s “life’s too short” motto. But the lines of her white sheets and are perfect and crisp. Lena sits on them and they’re distinctively cool and slick and it helps calm her increasingly flushed body.

It only took about about thirty seconds for Kara to quickly light a handful of candles, which created a soft, undeniably sensual hue across the room.And just before Lena could wonder where her many championship trophies were hiding -

Kara turns to look at her.

And Lena can’t think about anything other than what’s about to happen.

Kara’s eyes are dark and hooded and she looks at Lena like she wants to ravage her, but not with a fiery urgency. No, this is something else. This is a look as if she wants to _savor_ her.

Kara steps closer, hovering over her in an almost intimidating, dominating way, but instead -

She reaches out and gently moves Lena’s long raven hair back off her shoulder to open up a clear view of her porcelain neck. And she bends down and kisses the bare skin and Lena exhales. And Kara’s tongue finds her pulse and she feels herself melting. She wraps her arms around Kara’s neck so as Kara tilts back up, she takes Lena with her. Lena stands now, pressed against her. And Kara finds Lena’s lips and her tongue begs entrance here now - and Lena allows. And if she thought kissing Kara before was glorious...

Their tongues dance against each others for what feels like an incredible forever -

Until Kara breaks the kiss.

“Take off your clothes.” she says low and firm, an instruction Lena can’t possibly deny.

Lena reaches up and grasps at the fabric on her own shoulders - then hesitates. But Kara’s eyes staring at her chest with desire makes her want nothing more than to show her what’s underneath. So she slips it off her shoulders and Kara’s lips part slightly at the sight as Lena then works it on down past her hips. And suddenly she’s standing in front of Kara topless, wearing only black lacy underwear. One arm instinctively comes to cover herself - but Kara gently grabs her wrist and offers a single shake of the head.

“Lay back.”

And again Lena obeys and gets back onto the bed, this time laying down. 

Kara stands against the end of the bed and Lena’s heart races a little faster as Kara lifts her white top up and off of herself, revealing the familiar blue bikini top. Lena figures she’s always ready to jump into the water at any time and once again there’s something incredibly freeing about the thought. But her mind can’t process much beyond that when the sight of her flexing abs stare Lena in the face, and her brain short circuits even more - when Kara reaches behind herself and pulls the string and is suddenly topless in front of her.

Maybe she did it so Lena wouldn’t feel so alone in her half nude form, but either way Lena’s in awe at the sight. She’d never been this close to a topless woman in any sexual scenario before and her heart rate starts to increase further when she thinks about Kara laying down atop her, bare chest against hers.

But instead - Kara uses the back of one hand to part Lena's knees, creating an opening between her legs. 

“This okay?” is asked low, and Lena instinctually nods. 

But then her breath catches and her lips part and she wants to protest or - maybe not _protest_ because she wants this so desperately, but she doesn’t know what. She doesn’t know what she wants to say. She just knows she can’t think straight as Kara suddenly lowers herself down to her knees and Lena realizes what’s happening as those rough yet somehow still soft, strong fingers curl at the fabric on her hips and start to pull down. Tears come to Lena’s eyes in shock and some bizarre mix of relief and fear as she suddenly feels that cool, Pacific air gliding across every part of her. And she can’t look at Kara. She can’t look down, because it’s almost too much. An entire lifetime of denying herself this exact moment threatens to overwhelm - 

And suddenly a slick warmth replaces the breeze, and Lena’s back arches at the touch, a gurgled gasping half cry of startle escaping her throat as Kara’s tongue meets her core, running up the length of her opening. And then she settles further up and begins some sort of absurdly skilled, undulating ministration and Lena suddenly can’t breathe. And when the tip of Kara’s tongue teases her a little with mild back and forth vibrations over that perfect spot - Lena she starts to shake with anticipation and need and shock and being overwhelmed by the feeling. Her hips arch up again, begging for more than that - but Kara uses a strong hand to force her hips back down and even gives one side a slight massaging rub, to still her and relax her, as she gives her what she wants in the way she knows she needs, working her slowly and deliberately. She applies more pressure and _God_ -

Lena’s already going to come. Kara had only just started a few seconds before and she can’t believe she’s already so close and Kara can tell, and she wants to bring her on over, so she teases two fingers at her entrance, waiting for permission - that isn't granted. Because at the feel of Kara’s fingers ready to penetrate and accompany a tongue threatening to bring her on over the edge - Lena’s mind goes on overdrive. It’s all happening too fast and Kara’s too good, and it’s been too long. Hell, its been _never, _with a woman. And she’s suddenly totally self conscious about coming undone in this way. And because she’s too in her own head now, that wave of pleasure that was threatening to take her over, that was so close - is completely halted. And Lena’s whole body go stiff.

Kara senses what’s happened. What’s happen_ing_.

“Hey.” she says suddenly, in that distinctive way Kara does where ‘hey’ means so much more.

Kara leans up and over Lena -

“Hey, look at me.”

And tears well in Lena’s eyes and now she’s more embarrassed than ever as she looks away.

“Lena.” Kara says, hand coming gently to her face to force eye contact. Her thumb lightly strokes her cheek as she lets Lena gather herself. Finally -

“Do you trust me?”

It’s said with such a soft authenticity, that somehow… inexplicable - _yes_. Lena barely nods.

Kara pulls back long enough to unbutton her jeans and push them down, taking her blue bikini bottom with them. Lena’s eyes go wide at the sight of Kara’s absurdly perfect body that somehow exists with barely even a hint of tan lines.

Kara suddenly crawls further on up and over Lena, bringing a hand under Lena’s back to urge her further up the bed with her, so they now lay in the middle and Kara is atop her, pushed up and hovering over with one arm as she reaches to the side table with the other, digging something out.

Lena hears a distinctive jangle of something escaping its confines.

And then coming into view finally as Lena keeps her focus on Kara and her body and her every movement hovering over her -

Kara attaches a harness to herself and Lena gasps slightly at the sight of the medium-sized phallus now strapped to Kara.

And Lena understands now when Kara makes eye contact again, that she’s offering her something a little more familiar. Kara kisses Lena gently and then looks at her again, asking permission with her deep, loving stare. Lena forces herself to swallow and her head nods, ever so slightly.

Kara never breaks eye contact, even as she lowers down briefly to lick at Lena’s heaving chest, just enough so Lena’s mouth drops open further in a gasp and Kara knows she’s now even more ready for her.

Blue never even flinches away from green as Kara places her hips perfectly between Lena’s legs again while dropping her hand from view, aligning and perfectly gliding forward -

Lena gasps as she enters, and Kara can’t help but swallow hard herself because she slips in so easily from how wet she is. Kara slowly, agonizingly pushes all the way in until their bodies are perfectly flush, skin to skin. And it takes a minute for Lena to adjust to the feeling. It’s been ages since she’s been filled in such a way. And never like _this_.

And just as soon as she’s feeling content with the sensation - Kara, knowing from the slight sighing moan escaping Lena, draws her hips back slowly and adjusts her position between Lena’s legs just enough to be able to jerk her hips upwards a little as she brings them forward again and -

_Jesus Christ._ It was a gentle and slow thrust - but it landed at the _perfect_ spot.

And she does it again. And again.

Lena never thought this position would do it for her, because it certainly hasn’t before, but the way Kara rolls her hips just so, every single time - “_Fuck_…” escapes breathlessly from Lena’s lips as her brow furrows and mouth drops open. And she finds herself unable to take a full breath from the continuous, almost painfully slow movements.

The thrusts remain just like that for the longest time - slow and steady, the perfect undulating pace for an almost torturous build up that normally she’d be demanding increase in already in order to find the right place, but since Kara was literally hitting the perfect spot every. single. time. with every roll of her hips - Lena wasn’t about to fight it or ask for more, because she thinks she might come just from this. _God_, Kara _definitely_ knew what she was doing. And Lena knew what she was doing to her. She wanted Lena to savor it, to feel loved and worshipped, and to want more.

Just as Lena starts to dig her nails into Kara’s back, before she can even ask for more - it’s like Kara knows and so she hits a bit harder suddenly when she thrusts. Once. Then twice - as if preparing Lena - for when she finally picks up the pace. Lena’s moaning sigh comes again and combined with the further digging of her nails, it lets Kara know it’s _perfect_ \- and _good God_ she had no idea it could get any better than this -

Until Kara reaches up and grabs the headboard and starts to pound into Lena - not violently, but just enough. Lena gasps and she can’t breathe properly, or speak. She can only hold on for dear life and choke on a -

“K-Ka-th” trying and failing to cry out her name and tell her 'there' -

But they both already know she’s in the perfect spot. Because she’s not missed it no matter how slow or fast she’s gone. It’s as if Kara’s hips are designed for just this. Like she can see inside of Lena and can angle the tip of the phallus just perfectly _every single _(literal)_ fucking time_.

Lena’s scared to move, afraid it’ll cause her to not hit that same spot with the next thrust, because she's so close, but she can’t help but squeeze her legs tighter because she wants to feel Kara closer and deeper if even possible - and she does it just as Kara’s dragging back, and before she can wonder if this means a single thrust might miss hitting that spot - Kara adjusts, like she knows - so she doesn’t miss it at all and _Jesus_. Lena’s never had a lover be so precise, so perfectly timed, perfectly aimed, perfectly _everything_.

Kara is riding Lena with the same skill she rides her waves.

And just as Lena realizes she’s officially ruined on any other lover ever - the wave crashes and her vision goes bright and her body clenches and freezes up - and Kara doesn’t stop.

Lena lets out a deep, high-pitched screech as she reaches her climax - but it’s instantly silenced when Kara reaches down and rubs fingertips at Lena’s front in perfect little circles -

_OH GOD _she’s seeing white again before she ever even fully went over the edge from before, the combo of the stimulation and perfect thrusts sending her over even harder, and this time everything in her body strains, and Lena’s back arches and her entire being feels as if it might tear right open and explode from the inside out - 

This time Lena’s _silenced_ in pleasure, unable to even scream. Or speak. Or breathe._ Just as Kara has said._

Lena’s body finally trembles and starts to come down so Kara slows to that deliberate, gentle pace once again as if seeing her down from the high.

And Kara senses she’s still not fully breathing yet, so she stops hitting that spot, shifting enough so she still fills her up but isn’t causing any further need or build up or extracting stimulation as - 

“_Breathe_.” she whispers into Lena’s ear.

And Lena finally obeys and lets out the heaviest, most weighted and cleansing exhale of her life, before then taking a desperate, deep breath to replenish her oxygen. And she feels Kara slightly smile against her cheek.

And then she feels Kara slip out, quite easily given the slickness.

Kara reaches down and unlatches the harness and tosses the whole thing aside so their bodies are immediately flush again, laying down, center to center. And as they both catch their breath, Lena panting far more than Kara even though she did all the work - 

That’s when Lena feels the intense, desperate heat emanating from Kara’s core.

Lena runs hands up and down Kara’s lower back as she hovers over her, peering down while holding herself up atop Lena so she can now stare deeply into her eyes. She nods as if to ask Lena if she’s okay.

Lena understands and affirms with her own nod and a slight, grateful curl of her lips. And she closes her eyes for a moment and finally swallows and allows her breathing to slow.

So Kara leans down and kisses her, gentle and loving, with long, languid movements of her tongue and lips.

But no, there’s no way Lena’s letting her get away with not joining her in this feeling. So as Kara kisses her, Lena reaches over - and grabs the harness.

Kara’s lips leave hers and she frowns curiously as Lena pulls it between them.

Kara then understands what she’s doing. And if this is what Lena wants, she's not about to protest. She lifts her hips up off Lena enough to leave room for Lena to put it onto herself. It stands upright at attention between them. And Lena’s eyes go wide as she can’t even believe the sight of what she’s doing even though she’s doing it. She puts a somewhat shaking hand at the base and her eyes look up questioningly at Kara. And Kara almost smiles before putting her hand on Lena’s to steady her, and the glistening object between them.

Kara briefly locks eyes with Lena for a moment longer, then adjusts and guides Lena to help slip it it inside. She’s more than ready for it, so there’s no hesitation as she pulls it all the way in with a slight wince and grunt, profusely grateful for the feeling after being so worked up from giving Lena what she needed.

Kara exhales a sigh of relief at the filling as she settles down, the pressured weight baring down hard against Lena after everything has left her sensitive, so it feels amazing for the both of them, as Kara starts to roll her hips a little differently this time. This time, she’s finding the spot for herself, tilting and pushing up a bit more until - 

Lena’s just laying there staring up at Kara straddling her. _Riding_ her. It’s slow for a moment, but she soon increases her pacing as she brings herself closer and closer, and finally she’s just riding Lena with abandon.

The view for Lena is incredible - and she doesn’t know how she got so lucky to have this blonde goddess currently atop her, hair cascading across her shoulders. And as Kara grips at her own chest, Lena finds herself touching herself in the same way. And suddenly Kara is nearing the edge so Lena finally snaps out of her daze and lusting long enough to grab for Kara’s hips and help add an extra thrust and pull when Kara slams down on her, making it hit deeper and harder. Kara seems grateful, clutching one of Lena’s wrists as if she needs something to hold onto as she forcibly moves Lena’s other hand towards Kara’s front, guiding her to rub that perfect spot to help her on over the edge. Lena happily obeys, and together they push Kara over into oblivion.

Kara’s face contorts and her muscles tense and she bares down harder with every grind as she climaxes, and the unyielding pressure as she rides the wave of pleasure is too much for Lena’s swollen over-sensitivity, and her own mouth opens suddenly as Kara’s drops also again and -

They’re arriving together, Kara a quick second time to match Lena’s third, both releasing desperate grunting gasps of pleasure, Lena’s back arching under her again which only adds to Kara’s sensations as Lena’s hips join in at the upwards thrust, causing Kara to come a third time almost immediately, in the same time it takes Lena’s third arrival to wash over and finally calm down.

And then suddenly Kara’s collapsing down over her with an exasperated - 

“_Fuck_” of contentment, laced with a hint of what almost sounds like surprise.

And again Kara smiles now as she pants a bit harder than before, and Lena can’t help herself as she still breathes desperately, hands in Kara’s hair as Kara unlatches the harness from Lena’s hips and again pushes it aside.

Lena pulls Kara’s face to her immediately and kisses her with an intense gratitude.

And Kara smiles against the kiss before she buries her face in Lena’s neck and breathes in the scent of her.

And as they both catch their breath, with Kara still laying atop Lena, the weight of her body calming her and comforting her -

They’ve never been more grateful for broken rules.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sweetness and smut and an important Sam/Lena convo.

A cool morning breeze crept across Kara’s body as she lay nude on her back, light white sheets draped across her chest as she inhaled a floral aroma she’d grown to like very much in a very short amount of time. It was the scent of fresh flowers and a light hint of some fancy perfume. _Lena_.

Before her eyes even open, Kara’s mind wanders and a smile threatens at her lips. She feels something different than she usually does the morning after. It’s an odd contentment. She has no desire to open her eyes and slip out of bed and gently urge her guest to leave. In fact, for the first time in, well - _ever_, she had an urge to reach over and wake her bedmate up with a seductive tracing of hands, exploring her body, rousing her for another round. Kara rarely wanted another round from anybody. Yet here and now, she feels the odd pull of some bizarre combination of fulfillment - and a desire for more. _In so many ways_. She finally blinks open and reaches over - but her hand finds a wad of soft sheets instead. The bed is empty.

She frowns and briefly wonders if Lena freaked out and took off. Wouldn’t be the first time a closeted or supposedly straight woman completely panicked and fled after a night with Kara, but it’s definitely the first time Kara feels concern about it.

Until she sits up - and spots through the window - Lena, sitting in the sand outside, peering out to the sea. A small smile creeps to Kara’s lips as she notices she’s wearing one of Kara’s light flannels that she’d left on the arm of the couch - and nothing else. She sits there in the sand in her underwear and Kara’s top and something about the sight creates a swell in Kara’s chest. And then Kara’s face falls a bit, because_ damn - she’s in trouble_. She drops back against the pillow with a hand to her forehead and chuckle at herself.

\-----

Lena inhales the scent of saltwater and Pacific air. It’s a scent she’d breathed in all night, one that always emanated off Kara’s skin as if she was the human embodiment of the ocean.

Wearing only Kara’s light flannel button up and her black underwear, Lena’s elbows rest on her raised knees, bare feet and ankles digging into the soft sand. Her hand runs through her hair, tucking it behind her ears and she grins, fully and blushingly at the memory of Kara doing the same just a few hours ago as she laid atop her, both basking in afterglow, before rolling off and settling in next to her as they both drifted off to slumber. She remembers the overwhelming array of sensations Kara had made her feel last night. The things Kara had unlocked and set free. 

And that’s just it. As she stares out now, she feels that new feeling - of _freedom_. It’s like she’s broken through some hidden barrier that has blocked and haunted her since she was twelve years old. And she’s all at once a little bit scared a whole lot invigorated and excited.

“Hey.” speaks softly, as Kara suddenly appears next to her. And Lena doesn’t even have to look up. She feels that ‘hey’ in her bones. It’s a simple, singular word she’s come to associate with comfort and familiarity - and sometimes even seduction. Yes, somehow, one word from Kara can say so much. And right now, she can tell it’s spoken in a way as if to check on her. To be sure she’s _alright_.

Lena finally allows herself to look up and smile, ready to assure Kara that yes, she’s alright. She’s more than alright -

“Oh my God, Kara!” Lena’s eyes instead go wide at the sight of Kara topless, wearing only her small blue bikini bottoms as she takes a seat in the sand next to her.

Lena’s eyes dart around, worried someone might see.

Thankfully no one’s around. But she can hardly form words. She’d spent quite a long time with Kara’s chest pressed against hers last night yet still somehow the sight of her half nude, muscular, tan form in the bright morning light takes her breath away.

“You good?” Kara asks, voice low and heavy, still concerned for ensuring Lena’s okay.

Lena focuses and nods, appreciative of the concern. “Yeah. _Yeah_…” she says almost breathless with a smile on her face.

And something nice passes between them in the silence as they hold eye contact. Until Lena’s eyes can’t help but trace down again. She tries not to be too thirsty, instead -

“Now I understand why you barely have tan lines.” Lena jokes as she looks away and tries to focus on the crashing waves.

Kara gives a light tug to the side of the flannel. “You should join me.”

“No, thank you. I prefer not to burn my tits off.”

Kara laughs, “You _are_ very pale. Is that an Irish thing or a you thing?”

“Both.”

“Mm, well it works for you.” Kara takes a deep breath, "It _really_ works for you.” she finishes, her eyes tracing down Lena’s bare legs. “Still…”

Lena can’t help but blush a bit then when Kara reaches over and tentatively slips teasing fingers between the buttons which keep the flannel closed at Lena’s chest.

“What if someone sees?” Lena asks in disbelief.

“What if they do?” she shrugs like it’s no big deal, then she smiles and assures, “They won’t, it’s quiet here.“ she says, gesturing behind them, “And I own the land, for about six acres that way. Beach may not be private, technically. But most people respect my spot.”

Lena’s mouth drops, “Are you serious? So the house - “ she starts, not intending it to be at all a judgement, because she loved Kara’s little shack. She’s just surprised she’s not remodeled or expanded if she has that kind of money.

“It was here when I bought it.” Kara shrugs as if that answer is enough. As if _duh_, why would she fix what’s not broken. Even if it is a little broken. 

Then Lena realizes something, glancing back.

“Wait, Ano and the food truck - he rents that spot?"

“Nah, he gives me free food.” Kara states matter of fact.

Lena laughs and shakes her head.

“You consistently surprise me, Kara Danvers.”

Kara smiles and glances off to the other direction at the sight of a flock of birds overhead, her back turning slightly towards Lena.

That’s when Lena spots something startling and her face drops. Something she’d yet to notice. Sure, she’d been so focused on her broad shoulders and muscled body all this time, and last night she was just holding on for dear life and couldn’t think past her own gurgled cries of pleasure - but she doesn’t know how on Earth she missed it.A large scar starts just under Kara’s right breast and curves around her side. Then at the back flank there’s a smaller, even deeper scar. Almost like a hole. Both aren’t even very faded, still quite visible, obviously from not that long ago.

She wants to reach out and touch it and ask -

But Kara’s turning back suddenly with something in hand she hadn’t realized she brought with her and set to the other side.

Kara extends a small bowl of fresh fruit.

“You should eat.”

And yes, Lena’s starving. She figures there’ll be another chance to ask about the scar and she doesn’t want to dampen mood of this beautiful morning. Of having this goddess of a woman who’d literally rocked her world last night sitting next to her, peacefully staring out at the stunning ocean the way Lena had, as if for Kara too it was something rare. Even though she lived right here, she looked out at the ocean like it was the most amazing thing she’d ever seen and Lena adored that about her. Lena watches Kara’s jaw set and her mind wander a bit, almost intensely and - _my God, she’s literally so beautiful_. And it’s such a perfect moment. It’s not the moment for questions. So she instead just reaches for a chunk of mango.

“Good choice.” Kara breaks a smile again.

She grabs the same and they both enjoy the moment as they savor the shared treat.

They each can’t stop glancing over, sneaking looks. Lena especially can’t help but grin at the sight of Kara’s fingers selecting another piece. Those fingers. Those veins. _God_ they’d done such things to her last night, and with such simple touches. She’s blushing at the thought and Kara catches her.

“What?”

“You really are ‘the goat’.” Lena can’t help but blurt, only partially teasing.

Kara frowns, curiously humored. Then she realizes, “_Oh_, he did _not_ say that.”

Lena grins wider.

“I swear I’ma kill JJ next time I see him.” Kara huffs.

“No, please don’t, he’s sweet! And he likes you. Like everyone else on this island.”

Kara scoffs.

Lena’s head tilts, “Kara. You can’t truly not know how good you are?”

Kara’s lips part and she suddenly finds herself stuttering and it’s surprising and oddly adorable.

“I- I- I mean… it’s _not that hard_.”

“It is. For many people. Especially in my experience.” Lena argues.

“Hey, I’ve had some guys who know their way around-“ Kara starts, then Lena’s face shifts a bit. Slight awkward discomfort there at the mention of Kara’s past lovers, and Lena’s only experience having been with men and obviously quite unpleasant.

“Yeah I don’t know why I brought that up.” Kara quickly covers and laughs and Lena can’t help but smile again and shake her head as if to say it’s fine.

As Kara sucks juice off a thumb, Lena drops the humored mood and bites her lip.

Suddenly she’s leaning over to kiss Kara.

It takes Kara by surprise, but she easily settles into it.

Then as soon as their lips drag from each others -

“Thank you.” Lena says, barely.

“For what?” Kara asks, feigning innocence - and then grins. She knows _exactly_ what for. 

And Lena hates the playful smugness, so she pushes Kara over and climbs atop her as if she’s in for it.

Her legs straddle at Kara’s hips and Kara wipes the blowing hair from Lena’s face as Lena leans down and kisses her, deeply. And then Lena pauses, face staying close.

“I really have to get back. I need to shower and change. I have a brunch…”

“Mm.” Kara says. “I thought I could teach you some things.”

Lena flushes, nerves rising slightly at the comment, but heat and a deep wanting beating it out. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. You need a proper surf lesson.”

Lena’s face breaks into a grin at Kara’s tease.

“That’s not all I need.” Lena finds herself admitting, voice almost growling as she brazenly runs both hands across Kara’s bare chest, causing Kara to bite her own lip now as Lena then drags nails across her cut abs.

Lena’s hands then lift to undo two buttons on her flannel, so what was already a low opening reveals more to Kara, who’s eyes drop and go darker at the sight. Kara swallows hard as Lena lowers back down and is about to kiss her again.

“Not that I mind this, but - sand sex isn’t as hot as you’d think. Gets in - places.” Kara warns.

They both smile into another kiss, before Lena quickly pushes up and grabs Kara’s hand and practically drags her to the house.

The moment they’re inside, Lena’s basically throwing herself against Kara, who barely moves from the impact -_ Jesus, she’s like a steel wall,_ Lena thinks briefly, until she’s suddenly lifted into the air, Kara’s hands sweeping her up just below the rear.

Lena gasps in startle at the show of strength. _Steel, indeed_. Before she can be in any more awe -

Her back is hitting the fridge rather harshly, shaking a couple magnets loose, sending them bouncing to the floor.

But that’s not the only mess they make, when Kara then turns them and lands Lena on the counter by the sink, as bowls and dishes and glasses are knocked aside - crashing to the floor but neither cares. Lena especially, when Kara is instantly dragging Lena’s underwear down off her legs, giving both legs an intentional yank at the same time, pulling Lena’s ass to teeter off the edge of the counter as the black fabric falls to the floor along with Kara’s knees -

And_ Jesus Christ_ the feel of Kara’s tongue on her suddenly blinds her. Lena grips one hand in Kara’s hair while the other desperately claws for something else to hold onto, knocking more cups and items from the counter until she finally finds the edge of a cabinet to grip as -

_FUCK_, Kara makes her come _hard_ and _so_ much faster than she expected or thought possible and then - a GARBLE and high pitched throaty grunt as she’s worked back up almost immediately after, thanks to two fingers finding their way inside, this time without any hesitance or protest from Lena. In fact, this time she slides the hand from Kara’s head and uses it to grab Kara’s hand, pulling her closer, pushing those fingers further inside, knuckle deep and then there’s a curl and Kara’s ridiculous bullseye talents strike again, hitting that familiar wall, filling her up as that stupidly skilled tongue works it’s magic time and again.

And again Lena’s crying out, followed by more and more profane screams that echo out through the open window by the sink and get lost in the roar of crashing ocean waves.

——-

Lena traces fingertips at her neck as she stares off to the view of the ocean through the window of the hotel restaurant.

Her mind replays everything and she closes her eyes and relives the feel of Kara’s strong body and her hands and fingers and -

“Hey!” the chipper voice knocks her from her daydream.

“Sam!” Lena says as she turns, a genuine joy in her voice that surprises her best friend.

“Wow.” Sam says, halting in her tracks. She can’t believe how light and happy Lena looks.

“What?”

“Nothing.” she says quickly as she takes a seat by Lena.

“Where are the others?” Lena asks curiously, knowing she was late so it’s strange she was first there.

“Oh, I uh - I wanted it to be just us this morning. They were hungover anyway. Told 'em to sleep it off.” she shrugs as the waiter approaches.

“Two mimosas please. And um - you want a fruit plate? Or, protein maybe?”

“Can never have too much fruit.” Lena says, once again thinking back to this morning with a hidden grin and blush.

Sam notices as the waiter slips away. She wants to ask. She’s _dying_ to. Finally, after a bit of silence and Lena's obvious daydreaming, Sam can’t take it any more.

“Lena.”

“Hm?” Lena snaps out of it to ask, eyebrows raised.

Sam stares at her best friend. Studies her. Deeply. She looks like she’s barely slept yet is somehow totally refreshed. She knows the look. It’s that 'properly fucked' glow. She’s just never seen it on Lena in her entire time of knowing her.

“_Lena_.” she says again, almost accusingly, leaning forward and tilting her head.

“_Sam_?” Lena is humored by the look, but plays along.

“Come on.”

Lena frowns curiously now.

Lena’s really not getting it. Sam sighs, as the mimosas and fruit arrive.

So Sam tries a different approach, sipping and clearing her throat.

“So how was it last night?”

Lena almost chokes on her own sip, “Sorry?”

“The poi?” Sam clarifies.

But then she just stares, not blinking. Not moving.

Lena suddenly downshifts. And she looks insanely uncomfortable. Panicked.

“Oh, Lena. I’m sorry. I was only joking.”

Lena shifts in her seat. Looks like she wants to run, and Sam feels terrible.

“Lena I’m so sorry. I thought it would break the ice.”

“Sam, I-“

“It’s okay, you don’t have to talk about it. We don’t have to talk about it. God, I’m a horrible friend.”

“No. Sam, I just, I can’t…” Lena tries to form words and tears instead come to her eyes and she looks throughly humiliated and ashamed.

“Lena, no - sweetie…” Sam scoots forward, closer. She cups Lena’s face in hand.

“Please don’t, please don’t think you have to be ashamed.”

“But Sam…” a desperate tear falls now.

“Lena. You are my best friend. You are a smart, beautiful, wonderful woman. And an amazing human being.”

“Even if I-“ she can’t even say it.

“Full stop, Lena. You are a smart. Beautiful. _Wonderful_ woman. _And an amazing human being_. Full stop.” she repeats more intensely, head tilting in kind affection.

And Lena’s face breaks now and more tears fall.

“Are you-“ she sniffs, “Are you sure, it doesn’t change -“

“Full. Stop. My _best_ friend. Nothing changes. Nothing.”

Now Lena's tears are from relief.

“Because I’m so happy, Sam. I feel - I feel so free..."

Sam’s eyes water now and she drops her hands to Lena’s and she smiles, so grateful to see Lena say those words.

“I’m sorry I never realized. And I'm so sorry you didn’t think you could be this way before.”

“It wasn’t… I wouldn’t have been. It took…”

“Meeting a certain blonde water goddess?”

A tearful, blushing smile appears on Lena’s face now.

“She has better biceps than Jack.” Sam jokes and Lena laughs now and they share the sweet, funny moment as Lena uses her her napkin wipe away the tears. And they both gather themselves, sniffing and shaking it all off.

“Speaking of Jack - that’s partly why I wanted to meet with you alone. I had something to ask you.”

Lena clears her throat and nods, expectantly.

“Anything.” she says.

“Be my maid of honor?” Sam says with a tentative smile.

“Wh…” Lena’s shocked.

Lena’s heart swells because Sam asking her this, _now_, after she’d just revealed herself to her in such a way - only solidifies Sam’s promise that nothing has changed and she’s still her best friend.

“I’d be so honored, to have you by my side on Sunday." Sam finishes.

Lena lunges forward and hugs Sam tightly.

“Yes, Sam. Of course!” They embrace a long moment.

Lena finally pulls away, sniffing again from the extra tears that threatened to fall.

“Lucy’s going to be pissed.” Lena jokes.

“Lucy got a free trip to Hawaii. She’ll get over it.”

The two share a laugh.

And Lena fully relaxes and enjoys her mimosa as Sam starts in about the wedding, dishing gossip on Jack’s soon-to-arrive family, which includes a judgmental mother-in-law and trans cousin she says they'll have to be sure to protect.

Lena’s smile never fades as Sam rambles on and on.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluffy sweetness, but also starting to peel back some layers. Lots more to come, including some eventual drama and even a little action. ;) But for now - enjoy the soft.

Lena had enjoyed her brunch with Sam, especially given how things were now open between them and she no longer had to hide her true self from her best friend. But she’d also been anxious to get back to Kara. And Sam could tell. So after two hours of wedding talk and laughter as they reminisced on how she'd met Jack, Sam had finally made up an excuse about having last minute event details to work out. Lena had offered to help, but Sam refused, practically forcing her to “go, spend the day doing whatever you want” with a grin that was much too obvious, as long as she agreed to come to the pre-wedding luau they had planned for that night. Since it was one of the most important evenings, a chance for both sides of the family to get to know each other before the wedding, Lena had promised not to miss it.

But for now, she had half a day free, and she intended to enjoy every moment of it.

As the Uber rolls closer to Kara’s place, Lena suddenly finds herself growing a little nervous. Sure, only a few hours had passed, but she couldn’t help but wonder if things could’ve changed in that small amount of time, with each of them briefly returning to their normal lives. _Would the exciting, intoxicating, hot-and-heavy energy that had manifested between them last night and this morning still exist? And would it be as incredible as it was now that they’d had a moment apart? A moment to cool off? And maybe to reconsider?_ Lena certainly hadn’t. Every moment she was alone or with Sam, Kara was floating in the back of her mind. Replays of the night and morning were on repeat, along with a curiosity about what Kara was doing, who she was with, and if she was thinking about her in the same way…

She was about to find out.

Lena thanks the driver and climbs out of the car, adjusting a small beach bag on her shoulder. Standing in front of the house, she wears a black and gold bikini under a white coverup dress, with sandals and her hair pulled up loosely.

She approaches the front door and knocks. No answer. She glances through the large front windows - no sign of Kara. Lena frowns curiously and checks the phone in her bag. She’s on time. _So where's -_

A sudden CLATTER grabs her attention. She makes her way around the house to investigate the sound. Coming around the back side, she spots the small garage behind Kara’s jeep. More shuffling echoes out and Lena smiles, realizing Kara must be here.

“Kara?” she tries, tentative.

“In here!” Kara hollers.

Lena can’t help but smile at the voice and tone. It’s so casual and matter of fact. Here Lena was so nervous to see Kara again, and Kara was hollering at her from the garage like Lena showing up was an every day occurrence. Something about this disarms her a bit.

So she slips around to the opening -

And _wow_.

The place is _filled_ with surf boards and trophies and awards and photos from articles and events and competitions. It’s like an open window into Kara’s surf life. It takes everything in her not to walk right in and study every little thing one by one to learn more about this woman.

But in the middle of it, is Kara, thumbing through a row of boards standing upright in a row. It’s just one of many rows. Lena’s never seen so many types, colors and sizes of surf boards in her life. Kara collects boards like Lena and her friends collects shoes.

And then there’s Kara of course, in short jean cut offs and a sleeveless tee, her hair pulled up into a ponytail in a way Lena hadn’t seen and Lena wonders how the hell Kara can always look THAT good no matter what she wears or how.

“Hey - sorry, I’m tryna find...“ Kara trails off, still not having looked at Lena yet, but feeling her presence. 

“There we go, geez.” She smears dirty dust on her shorts and turns with a slight huff of relief as she wipes a loose blonde strand from her forehead, looking slightly sweaty since the garage didn’t allow for much airflow.

When she sees Lena, her eyes trace up and down. It’s brief. Blink and you miss it. She doesn’t let it linger or look at her like she wants to ravage her the way she did yesterday or this morning. Instead, it’s light and quick and she smiles, and Lena’s not sure how to take it.

“Hey.” escapes her lips with what Lena interprets as excitement. That’s definitely encouraging.

“Hi.” Lena replies, stepping further inside, somewhat hesitantly.

Something slightly awkward happens next. Kara makes a move to step closer, but stops herself. Instead she grabs a small towel off the work table in the middle of the room.

Lena’s disappointed, and as Kara’s back turns to her, panic starts to rise. A million awful questions run through Lena’s mind now -

_Has Kara changed her mind? Was she over Lena already? Why wouldn’t she be? She’s Kara Danvers. Or was it something else?_ After Kara had made her come apart in the kitchen this morning - six times - Lena had left quickly on wobbly legs because she was running so late. _Should she have tried to return the gesture? Did she leave Kara unsatisfied and thinking she was a “Pillow Princess” - was that even the term?_ A lesbian coworker had once explained certain slang to her when it was referenced in a film they’d seen together, and suddenly she couldn’t remember the specifics. _Was she a bad lesbian? A bad lover? Was Lena truly just another notch on the bedpost? Did Kara ever even_ -

“Here ya go.” Kara’s voice and the thump of a surfboard bottom planting to the ground between them knocks Lena from her panic.

Kara coolly stands there with one arm at the top and a slight smile on her face.

“… Sorry?” Lena’s still reeling from her own mental overload as she looks at the white board which is painted with an intricate, beautiful red floral design.

“She’s all yours."

Lena’s confused.

“I don’t- are you- _giving_ me a surfboard?”

“I’m… _letting you borrow_ a surfboard. You’d have to stick around for me to give it to you. The board, I mean.” Kara smirks at the obvious double entendre.

And suddenly all of Lena’s questions from before disappear. In its place a slight flushing of her skin, the gesture and suggestiveness overwhelming her, on top of the ‘you’d have to stick around’ which she loves the sound of. But then, suddenly -

Lena briefly sinks as she remembers this is temporary. And the thought weighs on her a bit.

And Kara can tell something’s up.So she looks at the board she’s holding and clears her throat. “I wanted to kiss you the moment you walked in, by the way. But you seemed a little in your head, so, didn’t wanna push.”

And all at once, Lena feels awash with relief. And then realizes - if their time is limited, she’s sure as hell going to make the best of it.

Before Kara can even look at Lena again, Lena’s lips are on her, arms around her neck the same way she was when they went back to the house this morning after the beach. And now it’s as if they never left and the red board falls out of Kara’s hand as her back hits the closest row, because this time she wasn’t expecting it and given a chance to be all steely like before. And that row - and all the others against the wall - dominoes, wrecking one whole side of the garage, turning it into a mess of boards on their sides, piled atop each other.

“Oh my God I’m sorry!” Lena pulls back and gasps, hands to her mouth in shock, eyes wide.

She has no idea how Kara’s going to react -

But then Kara starts to laugh. Hard.

“Came in like a wrecking ball!” Kara jokes.

Lena can’t help but laugh now too.

“Warn me next time, Luthor, damn.”

Lena’s smile grows, loving Kara’s playful nickname. Somehow she manages a return of bravado -

“That’s what you get for not kissing me the moment I walked in.”

Kara grins so hard her eyes squint a little and it’s freaking adorable and she nods.

“Alright. Lesson learned.”

And then she leans in and gives Lena a brief but warm kiss before she starts to clean up and put the boards back in their place.

And Lena's smile never fades as she helps her. Until - 

“Wait is this -“ Lena says suddenly, spotting one buried in the pile, “You have a Teen Choice Award?!”

Kara turns and chuckles, “Choice Female Athlete.” she starts, before pulling another one from under the pile just like it to demonstrate - “Two years in a row.”

“Wow, you really are famous.” Lena says in disbelief.

“I mean… not really.” Kara says with an awkward shrug as she keeps straightening up. It’s obviously something she isn’t comfortable with and Lena finds the humility endearing as hell.

“But you have no social media.” Lena says, shaking her head.

Kara shrugs again, mentally noting and liking the fact that Lena must have checked. “Don’t care about appearances and that’s all it is. Well, that and a marketing tool. But now that I’m outta the game - don’t need it.” she finishes and Lena swears she hears a slight sigh attached to that last bit.

Kara then withdraws a blue-hued board from the pile and sets it on the ground next to the one she’d pulled for Lena, as she continues to explain -

“The moments I want to share with people, I share in person. For real. And I remember them here.” she points to Lena’s head. Then the back of her fingers trace light at Lena’s chest, over her heart, as she steps up to her. “And here.”

Heat suddenly rises between them as Kara lets her fingers continue to drop, tracing down the front center of Lena’s entire body, sending chills across her despite the humid room.

“And here.” she whispers lightly in Lena’s ear as her hand slips up Lena’s thin dress and thigh and Lena gasps from the teasing touch.

And Lena could drop to the ground and ride Kara on a surfboard right there and now.

“I’m deleting my accounts today.” Lena barely chokes out.

“Good.” Kara says low. She lightly kisses her.

“More time for surf lessons. Hope you’re a quick study.” she finishes matter of factly, with a sly smirk and challenge.

Lena’s head tilts in mild annoyance, fully heated now but with nothing more happening any time soon. And based on the smug look in Kara’s eyes as she picks up both their boards with those strong arms and heads for the jeep, she knows how worked up she’s left Lena, and she loves it.

She’s really going to make Lena wait. And surf. And earn it.

And Lena had every intention of doing just that.

——-

Lena smacks the water with a hilarious YELP.

She pops up practically choking on salty wetness and wipes the sting away long enough to see Kara holding back a smile.

“Lena. Can’t believe I’d ever say this to anybody, but you gotta stay off your knees.”

Lena gives a disapproval tilt of her head at Kara’s attempt to be funny.

“JJ didn’t have a problem with it.”

“JJ wanted to get in your pants. I’ve already been there. So I’m not letting you get away with that.”

She re-slides the board across the surface of the water between them.

“Ha. Ha.” Lena says with a sniff.“God how do you take this salt water.” she then blinks forcibly, red-eyed.

“You get used to it. Come on.” she says giving the top of the board a pat. “Stomach to feet this time. All the way up. No hesitation. No knees.”

“That takes core strength, Kara. We don’t all have your abs.” Lena argues as she slips onto the board, her butt winding up in Kara’s face. Kara finds herself staring a moment.

“Kara?” Lena says glancing back, catching her. She grins to herself. Doesn't call her out. “Shouldn’t we be doing this on dry land?”

“What? Yeah.” Kara snaps herself out of it. “I mean no. You can’t do it in calm water, you’ll never do it in motion.”

“You want to see me do it in motion, eh?”

Kara grins with a bite of her lip and light chuckle, “You’re not distracting me Lena. You’re not getting out of this. I can’t keep sleeping with somebody who can’t ride a wave.”

“Oh I think I’ve shown you I can ride a wave.” Lena now challenges with a suggestive cock of her eyebrow.

And instead of responding in flirtatious kind - 

“Prove it.” she says, giving Lena’s board a slight shove.

“Up!” she claps.

“Are you an instructor or a drill sergeant?” Lena humorously accuses and something in Kara’s face down shifts a little, only briefly, and Lena frowns, wondering what it is that’s altered her mood. But before she can even ask, Kara adopts a renewed smile.

“You wanna surf hard, you gotta train hard.”

“What if I want to surf soft.”

Kara laughs, “No such thing. Let’s go.”

And Lena sighs, but she’s determined. She’s determined to impress Kara.

So Lena grits and gives it her all, hopping up from the laid position on her chest with a grunt -and she actually gets to her feet -

But falls right over, unbalanced - and Kara catches her as she lands this time, basically bridal carrying at the water's surface.

“Well look at you.” Kara says, impressed. “I think you’re finally ready.”

“Yeah?” Lena says lightly, loving the feel of this moment.

“Yeah.” Kara replies softly - before she tosses Lena back into the water and Lena screams out.

She instantly splashes at Kara the moment she’s back upright and Kara laughs and dodges the small wall of water coming at her in response to the toss. And they laugh and continue to water fight for a moment, until Kara dips under the surface and Lena screeches at the feel of Kara’s fingers nipping at her ankles.

——-

A couple hours and no success later, Lena and Kara are at a snow cone stand by the beach. Both are still fairly soaked, but back in their cover up and clothes. Lena can’t help but stare at the wetness of Kara’s white shirt from the damp suit underneath and the distinctive outline as she reaches to take two cones from the owner of the shack.

“You’ll get one. I swear.” Kara assures, exchanging a $20 with the owner for the cones before offering a wave of her hand to let him keep the change, even though the total is less than $5.

“You’re not leaving this island without catching a proper wave. It’s not allowed.”

“You know, I might have caught one yesterday if you hadn’t barreled into me.”

“Oh, is that so?” Kara says scooping a big mouthful of blue raspberry shaved ice into her mouth as she walks around Lena and Lena follows her and they begin to stroll.

“So what’s the deal with the beans, anyway?” Lena asks while biting into a small scoop of her strawberry.

“Oh in the cones? Just a local thing. You wanna try it?”

“OH, no. God no.”

Kara stops.

“Okay, yeah now you’re definitely trying it.”

“Kara no!” she protests as Kara walks back to the shack.

“Hey can I get a small with azuki?”

“Kara!” Lena pleads, but then Kara’s taking the tiny cone from him and extending it, snatching Lena’s strawberry away from her in a forced exchange.

Lena grimaces at the sight.

“Come on. Down the hatch.”

Lena sighs.

“Am I going to hate it?”

“That’s up to you.” Kara shrugs. Waits.

Lena finally tentatively scoops and rolls it around in her mouth and swallows, face almost reading as if she might like it -

“NOPE.” she says, immediately making a grossed out face. She absolutely _hates_ it.

Kara holds back a laugh.

“You actually like this?” she says with a remaining strain on her face which makes the vein in her forehead stick out a bit in a way that Kara finds adorable. 

“Not at all. I just wanted to see if you’d try it.”

Then she takes a spoon-less bite right off the top of Lena’s strawberry cone.

“KARA!” Lena bellows while throwing the beaned ice at Kara, who tries to dodge - but winds up with a spatter on her shirt.

Kara responds immediately by dumping both cones in hand right onto Lena who squeals from the cold. And then they tussle slightly and Kara winds up with her arms around Lena from behind as Lena struggles against her playfully - until she sees a passing family glance at them.

And Lena locks up and pushes Kara’s playfully gripping hands down and off of her body, and Kara recoils.

“Sorry.” she says quick and low, respecting Lena’s apparent discomfort at any public display.

Kara steps back to give her space as she licks red and blue off the back of her own hand, the mood instantly becoming awkward.

Once the family is focused on ordering from the shack - the two are strolling away again, Kara trashing the cone cups on the way.

“I’m sorry.” Lena says after a moment of silence.

“No worries. I understand.”

Lena legitimately believes Kara is okay with it, even if she's not herself. She hates that she’s still hesitant to be publicly open with things.

Lena wants to move past this moment, so she perks up again as they head back to Kara’s jeep.

“So, who taught you to surf, anyway?”

Kara lightens and seems relieved to move onto a new topic.

“Oh, um, well my dad originally, when I was little. We spent most our free time at the beach. Mom used to call me her little water baby.” she frowns a little then shifts, “My dad was actually kinda terrible at it, but said I was a natural. So they uh, put me in lessons when I was eight. And uh, my coach - I loved him, man, he was awesome. He was my coach through everything… my first comps… first major championship when I was sixteen. I wouldn’t be what I am without him.”

Lena smiles as Kara tells her all this. She loves finally learning something about her.

“What’s his name?”

“John. John Jones. Next to my dad, he was - one of the best men I ever knew.”

Lena frowns.

“Was?”

“He uh, died. From a brain aneurysm. A week after we won that championship.”

Lena notes use of ‘we’ and softens at Kara considering it a shared victory with her mentor.

“Kara, I’m so sorry.”

“Yeah. It was just so sudden, you know. And I didn’t take it well, if I’m being honest. I went through some stuff. Stopped surfing. Caused some - family drama. And I dunno, one day it’s like I just woke up. I realized how pissed he woulda been if he saw me acting like that. He woulda clapped his hands in my face to snap me out of it and growled at me to get my ass back on that board. So I did. I did my best to make him proud. To make all of 'em proud.”

Lena frowns curiously at the final comment, laced with a haunted weight she's never seen from Kara. But Kara shifts and pushes past.

“And I never stopped. Not ’til I had to.” she smirks at the end with a twinge of obvious frustration.

Lena wants to ask more, but -

Kara suddenly glances up at the sky and its hazy orange tint.

“Didn’t you say you have some dinner thing tonight?”

Lena’s lips part to speak, but she’s unsure what to say. She wants to stay right here and ask more questions and hear more about Kara’s life and family and all of her scars while they watch the sun set together. But she promised Sam.

“Em, party. Luau, actually.”

“Ah. Nice. I’m sure you’ll get some hula lessons. You’ll love that.” Kara teases, sarcastically. And Lena just stares at her. It’s amazing how quickly Kara can shift from heavy topics to a soft smile that she has no doubt is entirely genuine.

And Lena wants nothing more than to kiss Kara's blue-stained lips.

And Kara knows it. Because she looks at Lena's red ones the same way.

But there’s a lot of people around.

“Come on, I’ll drive you back.” Kara says gently, giving Lena an out.

Lena remains behind for a moment, staring after her as Kara walks around the jeep to open the door for her, a gesture that’s become a lovely routine now.

And Lena nods in gratitude and climbs in.

And as they make their way down the road and the sky turns a gorgeous shade of lavender - Lena looks over and Kara has that look. That jaw set, mind wandering, stoic look like this morning on the beach.

“We're still on for the hike tomorrow?” Lena finally asks, tentative.

Kara looks over and offers an assuring smile as if she’s crazy to even ask.

“Of course.”

Lena’s happy to hear it. And she can’t wait to get tonight over with and see Kara again in the morning. It's actually a bit overwhelming, how they’re not even apart yet, and it’s like she’s already missing her.

And as always, Kara can sense Lena’s yearning, and maybe even shares it - because she reaches over and takes her hand. And their fingers intertwine.

And Lena’s heart swells as they continue to drive in a pleasant, comforting silence.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gotta love the fluff. What can I say, it's a sugary slow burn. But some reveals are incoming. Soon.

_Drums. Vibrating hula hips and fire dancers to match. Tiki torches. Laughter. Food. Alcohol._

It’s exactly as one would imagine for a luau put on by wealthy tourists with too much money.

And in the middle of it, sipping her mai tai - Lena sits at an empty table as Sam and Jack make the rounds.

Two hula dancers suddenly inch their way closer. Lena puts a hand up to let them know - _not gonna happen_, but her polite smile at least says thanks.

She watches them move on, the sway of their perfect hips in tandem with the beat. It’s a sight that might’ve stolen her attention before. But now all she can think of is Kara. Kara’s hips. Kara’s hips moving to that rapid beat. _But not while dancing…_

A small curl appears at the corner of her mouth.

“Lena!” Sam’s slightly tipsy voice bellows, stealing her from her fantasy.

She looks up to see Sam waving her over.

She and Jack stand with a lovely young brunette. She offers a warm smile when Lena approaches.

“Hey Lena, this is Nia! Jack’s cousin!”

“Second cousin, if we're being technical. But might as well be my little sister.” he corrects with his distinctive accent, giving her a loving nudge.

“Aw. That’s annoyingly mushy, but thank you.” Nia replies somewhat flatly.

“It’s lovely to meet you, Nia.” Lena grins and shakes her hand.

“She’s the one.” Sam indicates to Lena. 

“What- I’m the what? Has someone volunteered me for something? Because I’d like to lodge a formal complaint.” Nia only partially jokes.

“No-“ Sam laughs, “Just think of Lena as the barrier between you and Jack’s mom.”

“Oh, yes. Aunt Amelia. Our resident crocheting transphobe.” Nia sighs.

“Now now, she tries.” Jack attempts to soften the perception, “And fails. Miserably.” he admits.

“Yeah, instead of blatant transphobia she utilizes the subtle art of passive aggressive observations.” Nia explains, _“You know it’s a shame Nia will never have a wedding like this.”_ she says with an accented, sarcastic impression of the woman.

“Oh, my.” Lena cringes.

“Yeah. So Lena, if you see Jack’s mom approaching Nia this weekend, your primary duty as my maid of honor - interception. Okay? Just pop in between them, and casually ask Amelia about her renowned faberge egg collection or… oh! Ask her about her trip to Athens. From the way she describes it, you’d think Greece had a personal vendetta against her family. Because the problem couldn’t possibly be her.”

“_Okay_.” Jack laughs, then off Sam’s look as if he’s brave to question - “Okay yeah, she’s right. My mother is a horrible person. Good luck, Lena.” he teases.

And with that Sam and Jack laugh and duck off to continue chatting with other guests.

Once gone -

“I’m sorry, Lena. They mean well but you don’t have to-“

“It’s fine, I’m happy to help. And em… I do know something about judgmental mothers, so it’s not _completely_ outside my area of expertise.”

“Yikes. Well, mine was incredible when I transitioned. Beyond supportive. Guess I’m lucky.”

“You are. Very much.” Lena says with a sad glance down.

Nia eyes her briefly. She then notices Lena looking antsy and catches an inward sigh.

“You seem like you’d rather be anywhere but here.”

“Oh, uh… not anywhere, really. Somewhere in particular.”

“Ahhh. What’s her name?” she asks slyly with an evil grin.

Lena’s face drops.

“W... Did Sam-“

“Oh, no. No! It’s just… this whole place reeks of heteronormativity but you just, seemed different. And the thing about your mom... I just took a guess. I'm sorry, I do that. I didn’t mean to -“

“It’s fine. It’s… it’s fine.” Lena tries to convince herself despite the nerves. “And, Kara. Is her name.” she decides to allow herself to say, realizing Nia's a safe person to talk to. 

“Sounds hot.” Nia says, loudly slurping the bottom of her her mai tai through the straw.

Lena looks at her oddly.

“Oh come on, _Kara’s a hot name_.”

Lena can't help but let a grin break through, yielding.

“Okay, it is. And she is. Very much.” Lena flushes a little. 

“You should go.”

“W-Nia, no I’m supposed to-“

“I insist.” Nia says, snatching Lena’s mai tai, drinking from it without hesitation since hers is all gone.

“Someone should get some action tonight besides those two.” she says giving a grossed glance to a straight couple nearby who are practically all over each other in a very inappropriate way, considering the event.

Lena stifles a smile.

“You’re sure? You’ll be okay?”

“Oh, two more of these and I’ll be more than okay.”

“But Sam-“

“Won't even notice. Not when I make sure the bartender puts extra rum in her drink." she jokes, but then to ease Lena's remaining hesitation - 

"Tell you what, I’ll cover for you here, and you can play protector on Sunday. I am _sure_ Amelia will be on overdrive at the wedding.”

Lena considers. Bites her lip. _God, she wants to._ And when she does the math and realizes the clock is ticking on her time with Kara -

“Alright. Nia-“ she grips the younger woman’s arms with desperate gratitude, “You’re a dream.”

Nia grins and winks and keeps on sipping as Lena hurries past the tiki torches and hula-failing guests.

——-

Lena makes her way towards Kara’s bungalow after being quietly dropped off close by. She wipes sand from the Uber’s back seat off her fancy white pants. She’d worn them paired with a black camisole to the party, and might regret it now if she didn’t think there was a chance she’d be losing her pants soon anyway.

She takes her heels off the moment she’s out of the car and makes her way across the grassy dirt leading up to the house.

And when she draws closer - she stops at a sight that makes her melt. A sight she wasn’t quite expecting.

Kara sits on the porch, bare feet extended out from her chair to the edge of a flickering fire pit. She’s dressed in a hoodie and shorts and her long hair is down, but hung over one side and tucked behind her ears, a few stray strands still teasing at her face from the breeze.

And she wears glasses, as she reads a novel.

She had no idea Kara wore glasses. No idea she enjoyed reading. And no idea she could look so soft and beautiful in the moon and fire light._ Every time Lena thinks she’s already fallen hard…_

And before she can speak or get her attention, Kara turns as if she senses her.

And Kara’s face softens from the crinkle in her brow that had formed from intense reading.

Her lips part in surprise and she doesn’t move from her comfortable position just yet.

“Hey.” comes softly. “I thought you had a luau.”

A long beat of silence as Lena’s face grows serious.

“I did.”

And Kara’s now matches.

“You wear glasses.” Lena says almost breathless, trying to say something other than what she really wants to say.

“Farsighted as hell.” She nods, taking them off and laying them in the open book.

And she waits. And neither move.

“Didn’t think I’d see you tonight.” Kara admits.

“I hope it’s alright, I… I couldn’t stay away.” she admits honestly, looking at Kara her next a breath held deep inside, wondering how she'll react to her honesty.

And then Kara puts the book down slowly and deliberately - and walks right off the porch. It’s not fast. But it’s purposeful.

And her hands are on Lena’s face and she’s pulling her into a kiss, filled with a gentle intensity, which grows as their arms wrap around each other.

“I think we have a problem.” Lena says when they part for air.

“We do.” Kara nods, breathless.

“What are we going to do about it?”

Kara shakes her head, eyes staying closed.

“Figure it out later?” she asks quickly.

“Mmhm-“ Lena says as she rejoins their lips.

And Lena’s hands drop to Kara’s ass and pull her tighter, grind herself against the hips she’d been fantasizing about all evening.

Kara grunts slightly.

“Someone’s anxious.” she teases.

“Mmhm.” Lena mutters again, this time against Kara’s neck as her hands tugs at Kara’s top.

“Swim with me?” Kara says suddenly, and unexpectedly.

Lena frowns curiously. That’s not what she was expecting.

“It’s beautiful tonight. Come on.” She says, untangling from Lena’s grasp and instead taking her hand and leading her to the water.

“I didn’t bring-“ but the statement is stopped when Kara’s already pulled off her hoodie and is removing her top. She lets go of Lena’s hand to then pull off her bottoms and - yes, Kara Danvers is now standing totally nude in front of her.

Kara doesn’t even look around. Lena certainly does.

“Kara…” she tries.

But Kara only replies with a smile as she turns and heads for the water.

Lena should have known skinny dipping would be something Kara would be into.

Eventually Kara’s sinking into the water so it’s at her chest, and she turns and watches and waits, as Lena remains behind. And struggles. She licks her lips and peers around again, her heart pounding.

Finally - _screw it_.

Lena yanks her own pants down and Kara smiles as she then pulls off her top. And finally, after one last brief hesitation - she removes her underwear. Then quickly runs for the water, hands trying in vain to cover herself and squealing as if she’s being chased by the nudity monster. And Kara laughs.

And Lena silences her by practically attacking her once she’s in the water, launching herself at Kara as if she can protect her and cover her.

“Oh my God. Oh my God oh my God.” Lena says, burying her face in embarrassment in Kara’s shoulder as she clutches onto her.

And Kara just smiles and holds her, rubbing her lower back gently with a stroking thumb.

“Look at you.” she says, as Lena finally looks at her, arms at Kara’s neck as they float in the water. 

Blue and green lock in on each other for a moment. 

And then Lena kisses her intensely. She wraps legs around her waist and rolls her hips against Kara’s. But just as quickly as she tries to ramp up again - Kara’s stilling her again. She applies pressure to stop Lena’s lower movements, and she moves Lena’s roaming hands to rest more loosely on her shoulders. And Kara offers a slight shake of her head as if to say no. And instead Kara just kisses her. Slowly. Passionately. Without urgency or ulterior intention. It’s a pure, languid, wonderfully loving, explorative kiss. And she keeps kissing her.

And Lena melts. And they just exist like that for the longest time, making out like a couple of teenagers. Until Kara feels Lena’s body relax, her desperation completely disappearing along with any tension.

And their lips finally part and Lena sighs. She breathes. And she feels content with Kara, just like this in the water. It’s exactly what Kara wanted. It’s what she needed. For them to just _be_. And Lena realizes and she’s both grateful and touched and falling harder by the second. And between the words exchanged on the beach and now, she knows Kara’s feeling the same, or at least close to it.

Now that Lena’s fully calmed and relaxed, _now_, Kara backs up and takes Lena’s hand and leads her out of the water. She grabs an old towel that she’d left at the base of the tree earlier and she protectively wraps it around Lena’s slightly shivering form.

And then Kara leads her back to the house.

And then she makes love to her, slowly and passionately, during which Kara’s hands and lips explore and trace each part Lena’s body as if memorizing every inch before she methodically brings her over the edge with those talented hips. And as Lena soars into oblivion, she swears she hears Kara say something in Hawaiian. Something breathless and erotic. And in the morning Lena will be grateful for the translation on her phone which reveals the words uttered in their moment of passion - 

_“You’re so beautiful.”_

——-

Early in the morning, Kara stands at the edge of the waterline, board tucked under her arm. She breathes in the familiar air - but something’s different now. 

Kara had been laughing at herself before, because she’d broke her own rules. But it wasn’t quite as funny anymore. What started off as simply thinking she was letting this tourist get under her skin in a way she didn't usually, has now become something more. Something deeper and definitely unexpected. Kara doesn’t necessarily believe in past lives, but she’s also not opposed to the idea. She’s a pretty spiritual person, and that’s the best way she can think to describe it - it was like they knew each other in a past life, or maybe some alternate universe. And now, she can’t help but be drawn to Lena, despite the fact that they come from such different worlds. They still barely knew much about the other. But as she’d told her at Ano’s - she wanted to know more.

And standing here now in front of her house at day break, ready to ride the early surf as she was used to doing every morning - she feels a pull she’s never felt. Nothing ever held Kara back before. _So why now did she feel tethered to the ground, unable to run out and catch the waves she caught every day?_

She turns and looks back at her house, where Lena suddenly emerges, wrapped in another one of Kara’s shirts, a big, beautiful smile on her perfect porcelain face.

_That’s probably got something to do with it._

Kara finds herself smiling back.

But then, it fades. And she swallows and feels something not quite so wonderful. Something slightly dreading. She shakes it off. And gives Lena a nod, before she turns and rushes out to the crashing waves.

Via speed and tricks and harsh pushes through a particularly rough tide, Kara cleanses herself of any previous concerns.

Meanwhile at the house, Lena watches her in awe.

And when Kara rises from under the surface of a last great wave - she’s surprised to find Lena coming into blurred view - on a surfboard. And she’s paddling out, several yards to Kara’s side.

“Wait, Lena no! It’s too rough-” she warns, expecting a particularly nasty wipeout if Lena even bothers to try to get to her feet -

But she’s shocked instead when Lena pushes up quickly - and catches a bumpy wave, her board bobbing under her but somehow she stays upright and Kara’s mouth drops in a shocked laugh and her arms shoot up in celebration.

“LENA!” she yells as Lena’s wide eyes grow wider and she grins proudly -

Then faceplants against the water in a brutal SMACK that’s sure to leave a mark.

“Oh SH-” Kara grimaces, arms dropping instantly, bracing as if she could feel it from there.

But then Lena pops up from under the surface, fists raised in victory, red-faced from the impact and eyes clenched from the burn.

“I DID IT!” she chokes out through the water in her nose.

And Kara can’t help but crack up.

And she keeps laughing as she approaches.

“You okay?!” she asks in humored concern.

“Not at all!” Lena chuckles through the pain.

“Come on, lōlō.” Kara says, calling her crazy in Hawaiian before dragging her into more shallow waters, “Let’s take that hike while you still can.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting to knoooow youuuuu. Getting to know *almost* all about youuu. ;)

Lena adjusts the leather strap at her neck and pauses as they make their way along the trail.

Kara walks a few steps ahead, after Lena had intentionally dropped back. Kara had halted for her but she’d said it was okay, so she kept leading the way, with Lena trailing close behind.

“What are you doing back there?” Kara finally asks, turning to see Lena pulling an old camera from her small bag.

Lena shakes it lightly to show it off.

“So _that’s_ what you needed.”

Kara had obliged Lena by swinging by her hotel on the way over since it was close by, after Lena had mentioned needing something for their hike.

They keep walking, working their way to higher terrain.

Lena stops periodically to snap photos of the high trees and birds flying overhead.

She takes care to get the right angle and she’s obviously a natural at it. Kara finds herself watching with a small smile, noticing how Lena seems in her element with a camera in hand.

And eventually, Lena wants to capture _her_.She drops back to snap a picture of Kara walking ahead of her, but before she can, Kara glances back in concern, always sure to check when Lena isn’t within an arms length.

When she spots the camera aimed at her, a hand comes up to block the shot playfully.

“I thought I wasn’t right for your magazine.”

“This is for my personal collection.”

Kara is hesitant.

“Please?” Lena asks with a smile Kara can’t resist.

“Alright. Where do want me?”

“Well, that’s a whole other question.” Lena teases with a raised eyebrow.

Kara chuckles.

“But for this, just… keep going. I’ll get what I need. Pretend I’m not here.”

“Impossible, but okay.”

Lena grins, blushing slightly at the sweet comment.

She remains several steps behind Kara as they keep hiking higher and higher. It’s a bit exhaustive, but she manages to keep up and snap her photos along the way, capturing Kara in various stages of trek, and she’s absolutely breathtaking, as always. Even now, somehow in the humidity and exertion, she’s still hot as hell. She’s a work of art really, with her toned, olive skin taking broad steps and strong arms stopping to push off the occasional tree.

“So you like livin’ in LA?” Kara asks over shoulder.

Lena practically laughs, “Does _anyone_ like living in LA?”

_Touché_.

“Yeah, my agent had me come out there for a few months after I retired. For meetings and ‘opportunities’. Like, acting and shit. Wanted me to be the Ronda Rousey of surfing. Even had me up for some crazy superhero show.”

“And?”

“And, I no longer have an agent.”

Lena cringes. “It didn’t go well.”

“Nah, it went great. I landed the part, but I didn’t want that life. Spending eighteen hours a day on a set. Keepin’ up the whole fame thing. That was never why I surfed. I surf to be free.” Kara says as she slows a bit and Lena takes this in. They continue onward in silence for a moment longer. Suddenly -

“Would you have gotten at least gotten a cape?”

“No, a skirt!” Kara replies, indignant.

“And that’s functional for fighting, how?”

“Thank you! That’s what I said!”

Lena smiles and they continue on up, with her dropping back once more to snap a photo of a clearing to their side, through which she can see stunning mountains in the distance.

“So tell me about your magazine.” Kara says over shoulder.

“It’s... a fashion magazine.” she says as she catches up again.

“So you’ve said. And?”

“_And_, it’s as you’d imagine. Models and runways and the latest trends. We only just launched two years ago and it’s already one of the top digital publications in fashion. We have an audience of six million on Instagram and better engagement rates than Vogue and Harper’s.”

“So it makes you happy?” Kara asks, a little breathless as they make their way up a particularly steep incline, and the humid air is getting a bit thicker.

“It’s incredibly successful.” Lena replies.

Kara nods, then stops and leans an arm up against a tree, tucking a chunk of her long waves behind her ear as she waits for Lena to catch up again. She extends a hand to help her through a particularly tough step over some vines.

“But does it make you happy?” she asks again.

Lena stops to consider the question, finding it a bit strange because she never thought about that part much. She just worked hard and measured success by the many impressive milestones reached along the way.

“Seems to me the best formula is finding success at what you love. What you’re passionate about. Enjoying the process not just the result, you know. You’re obviously good at what you do. Just wondering if it makes you happy.” Kara shrugs, as if to suggest it’s okay if Lena doesn’t have an answer.

Lena shakes her head, unsure how to respond. She leans against the tree opposite of Kara, gesturing to her camera.

“I mean I was passionate about photography. That’s how I got started. I loved capturing moments on film. Real film, not - smartphone snaps for social media. I don’t know, there’s just always been something incredibly beautiful about it. Timeless.”

Kara listens intently, obviously appreciating this artistic side of Lena.

“I suppose now it’s all about deadlines and click throughs.” Lena says finally, as if realizing for the first time how incredibly empty that sounds.

Then she looks at Kara, deeply. And lifts her camera. Kara doesn’t move at all, she just continues looking right at her and Lena captures the perfect shot of Kara looking straight into her soul.

Kara finally offers a slight smile and carries on.

“And what about you?” Lena asks as they continue to ascend the steep trail.

“What about me?” Kara practically pants in a mild laugh.

“What are you going to do now that you don’t surf competitively?”

Kara frowns as she uses a tree to help push herself further.

“Surf for fun.” is the matter of fact answer. 

“You know what I mean. For work.”

“I’m starting to get the feeling work is an important thing to you.”

“It’s a part of life.” Lena shrugs.

“Is it?” Kara says, turning and pausing. “I mean don’t get me wrong, I appreciate putting in a hard day’s work. I value effort. Hell I used to train for ten plus hours a day sometimes. But I don’t have to do that now. I don’t _have_ to do anything."

“Ever?” Lena asks curiously, surprised.She knew Kara had money, _but so much she’s set for life?_

“Yeah I mean, six years of championships, endorsements… I saved most of what I made. Invested the rest. You know, in brands like Kulture and-“

“Wait, Kulture? Kulture with a K?”

Kara nods like it’s no big deal.

“Kara that’s… the largest Kombucha company in the US. Everyone in LA drinks it. I remember reading how they were acquired by PepsiCo for… nearly_ half a billion_ dollars.”

“Yeah, I know, that sucked. Selling to some all-powerful super corp like that... But it was my buddy Winn’s company. He and the others had majority share. I only owned like a quarter.”

“_Twenty-five percent?_” Lena asks shocked.

“Not anymore, I sold off after they sold out. I mean I don’t blame him, I guess. But big money was his goal, not mine. I only invested because I cared about the product. The health benefits. Who knows what the hell Pepsi’s gonna do with it. Probably add corn syrup and benzoate, ya know.”

Lena’s too busy doing the math to process the rest, realizing that means Kara cashed out _for over a hundred million dollars_ and her mouth has already dropped. It’s not that she’s impressed by money or really cares, it’s just that she’s truly, genuinely shocked. Shocked that Kara, who sits in old hoodies outside her run down bungalow in nowhere Oahu eating poi and mentoring young surfers - is worth over a hundred million. If not more. Because who knows what else she’d invested in or how much wealth she’d accumulated.

“You did the math.” Kara says suddenly, startling Lena from her thoughts.

“What? No, I-“ 

“It’s okay. People always do the math.” she says and then coughs a little and clears her throat.

“I have plans for most of it though. When I die some day, aside from family, the bulk is going to charity and environmental initiatives. Hell a lot of it already does. So, you know... just in case you were a gold digger.”Kara finishes with a deep frown of judgement, arms crossing.

Lena’s eyes turn to saucers.

“Kara, no - I, I would never-“

Then Kara grins. Widely.

And Lena sinks and her jaw sets in playful annoyance.

“Very funny.”

“Nah, I know you already come from money.” Kara says, carrying on finally.

“Bold of you to Google me.” Lena finally calls out as she follows.

“You Googled me first.” Kara smirks over shoulder.

_Touché, _once again.

They hike further and further, and again Lena goes to snap a photo of Kara, but then she stops when she watches her through the lens.

Kara’s out of breath. Surprisingly so. More than Lena is. Kara, perfect physical specimen Kara who barely ever even broke a sweat or lost her breath doing _anything_ else is suddenly making a wincing face and inhaling deeply as if she can’t catch air.

Lena lowers her camera in concern.

“Kara? Are you alright?” she asks, quickly stepping closer, putting a hand on her shoulder as she leans over, hands to knees. Lena’s concern grows because she’s never seen Kara like this.

“Yeah… yeah, it’s the altitude and humidity. It happens sometimes.” she says, pushing back upright and waving it off.

“Let’s take a break.” Lena says, gesturing to a large downed tree nearby.

“Nah, it's not much further. Once we’re by the falls I’ll be fine.”

“Kara, please.” Lena asks with more urgency, because she _really_ doesn’t like the sound of Kara’s breathing, swearing she hears a wheeze when she exhales. Which she’s doing deeply and with a strained face each time.

“Yeah. Yeah okay.” she says, stepping over and leaning against it, forcing her breathing to calm.

“Is this - does this have anything to do with your accident?”

“My what?” Kara asks with a deeper frown than expected. Then she realizes and lightens. But only a little. “Oh, you mean my near death experience at Pipe?” she smirks. “I was wondering when you’d ask about that. Figured you would’ve after watching the video.”

“I didn’t. Watch the video. I- I couldn’t.”

Kara’s head tilts, finding this both odd and a bit of a relief.

“Yeah me neither.” she finally admits, softly. “I tried to, once. About a month after. Turns out living it was enough.”

Lena finally takes a seat next to her on the tree.

“What happened?” she finally gets up the nerve to ask, “If - if you don’t mind talking about it. If it’s not too… traumatic.”

Kara shrugs slightly. “There are worse things.” she only partially jokes. Lena frowns, deeply concerned by the statement, wondering what else this woman could possibly have been through in her life if a near death experience at the most dangerous surf competition in the world isn’t the worst thing. 

But when Kara begins her story, Lena is immediately refocused.

“It was like any other day at Pipeline. You know, always dangerous, but nothing I wasn’t used to. It was my second wave. My first, I'd killed it. Had the lead by a mile, thought I had it in the bank for the seventh year running. And... I don’t know, somethin’ just - went wrong. I wound up wiping out. It happened quick, I honestly still couldn’t tell you what happened exactly, _why_ I mean. I don’t remember, to be honest. I just know I was droppin’ in and then I was - I hit the water. Fast. Like… highway speed fast, and the impact from how I struck alone clocked the hell out of me. Instant concussion. But that wasn’t the worst part. That was only the start. ‘Cuz next thing I know, I’m deep. And I’m hittin’ the reef. Hard.”

Kara’s jaw sets a bit and she closes her eyes, struggling to remember as much as she can, and it’s clearly unpleasant so Lena just waits, a deep furrow in her own brow as well.

“And I feel this pain. In my chest. Like-“ she snaps her finger, “Instantly. I knew something bad had happened. I don’t remember much about what I was thinking the rest of the time, but in that moment, when I hit that reef on my side, at that angle…“

“What was it?” Lena can’t help but interrupt to ask, almost breathlessly.

“My ribs. My lung. It was punctured.”

Lena sinks.

“But even _that_ wasn’t the worse part.” she says almost humorously even though there’s nothing funny about any of it. And Lena can’t imagine how it could possibly get worse.

Kara rubs at her own hands, fiddling with her fingers a bit.

“My... leash, got caught.” she takes a slow breath, “So between the barrel, and the disorientation, the concussion, the pain in my chest - I couldn’t, I couldn’t get free.”

Lena’s eyes start to water, lips parted and brow deeper than ever. It’s like she’s in that moment with Kara. Kara, who was _drowning_. And it’s absolutely terrifying.

“And then I felt… almost like a pop. That’s… that’s the only way I can describe it. In my chest. The pressure...” she recalls, strained at the painful memory.

”It was my lung collapsing."

Lena blinks, barely breathing herself now.

"And then everything got… very still. Even though I was still moving from getting worked. It was just… stillness, inside. Quiet. Dark."

Lena swallows.

"I don’t remember what happened after that. They said I was awake when they brought me to the surface and put me on the stretcher. I don’t remember any of that though.” she pauses, thinking back, haunted.

“They said I was under for eight minutes before they got to me.”

She searches her own mind for the memory, but can’t find it. And maybe that’s better.

“Anyway - collapsed lung.” she says more casually now in summary, gesturing to her side, where Lena knew she had the deep scars.

“Kara…” Lena tries, not even knowing what to say. She’s noticed the many small nicks and cuts on Kara’s entire body from a life lived with so much physicality, but those deep scars in particular had haunted her from the moment she’d first seen them. And now she knew why.

So she just reaches over and gently touches the spot on her side, hidden under Kara’s sleeveless tee, as she studies her face and finds only a brave toothless smile offered from Kara as if to assure her it’s okay and she shouldn’t worry. But she still does.

“Anyway that’s the big story. Of how Kara Danvers ended her surf career. Went out with a bang. Or a pop.” she jokes.

“_Kara_.” Lena says with a tilt of her head, admonishing.

“It’s okay. I’ve come to terms with it. I still surf. I’ll always surf. It’s in my blood. Nobody’s ever gonna take that from me. I just - can't compete. The doctors… they said I had like a seventy percent chance of it happening again if I’m ever too deep, or under for more than two minutes. I used to be able to hold my breath for six…” Kara scoffs in irritation. She shakes it off. 

“Anyway the damage was so bad, my lung just… can’t take the pressure, I guess. They said if it happened again it could trigger a ‘cardiac event’.”

Lena’s eyes go wide again.

“Jesus, Kara.”

“Yeah.” 

A moment of silence passes between them.

“Hey, I’m healthy as a horse aside from that.” she says with a grin and shrug.

Lena watches her a bit longer, then finally gestures to the small scar on her forehead, “This from it too?” she says, assuming.

Kara's lips part and she pauses.

“No, that’s… something else.” Kara says briefly making eye contact, before looking away.

Lena’s mouth opens to ask, but Kara shifts.

“We should uh, we should get going.”

“Kara-“

“I’m okay, really. I’m good. And once we reach the water, it has a sorta cleansing effect to the air. So I’ll be breathing a lot easier, I promise.” she says pushing up.

And Lena doesn’t press, because whatever the facial scar is from, she realizes it must have something to do with the “worse things” she’d mentioned before. And Kara has already opened up so much, which she's grateful for, so she’s not about to push her luck.

Lena finally extends her hand up toward Kara.

“Let’s go.” she says finally, with a light smile.

And Kara takes her hand and pulls her up. And onward they trek.

——-

When they emerge to the waterfall, now it’s time for Lena’s breath to be taken away.

Her mouth drops in awe of its beauty and she immediately takes a photo. And then Kara reaches for the camera.

And Lena gets the message. She captured it, now she wants her to _experience_ it.

A moment later they’re jumping in the cerulean pond at the base of the waterfall, and Lena can’t help but notice how it basically matches Kara’s eyes as she smiles and playfully swims around Lena. And Lena’s relieved to see Kara’s breathing has returned to normal, as promised.

Meanwhile Kara’s grateful no one else is around, because she knew the spot could be popular with tourists sometimes. But they’d come at the right time, apparently. Because it was just the two of them. Which meant she could swim up to Lena and kiss her without causing her any worry. And she did just that. And Lena grinned into it.

Within minutes, they’re carefully climbing up the rocks, inching closer to the heavy downpour from the waterfall. As they start to step under it, the intensity almost knocks Lena off the slick rocks, but Kara’s strong hand grabs her in a flash, holding her steady, like always.

“There’s a cave behind there.” Kara says, nodding to the intense flow.

And suddenly Lena’s fascinated and wants to see.

So together they quickly dart under the pounding falls.

They emerge into the cave, soaked once again, both wiping their faces as Lena looks around. It’s small, but cool. Literally. There’s a chill to the air inside here. And the waterfall outside the opening creates a wall of privacy and roaring echo, which Lena likes as she sees Kara running a hand through wet hair.

“What?” Kara catches her staring. And she pretty much knows what, because she knows that hungry look.

And it’s confirmed when Lena pushes her against the rocky wall, and her hand slips down Kara’s chest, between her breasts, on down past those abs - before it dips into Kara’s shorts, as Kara’s mouth drops open.

“What are you doin’ Lena?”

But she already knows what she’s doing.

Lena’s doing what she’s been dreaming about all day, especially after Kara’s story.She’s never done this particular thing before, but she’s a quick learner and she figures now is as good of a time as any, because she feels the overwhelming desire to worship Kara Danvers in the way she deserves.

She pops open the button at her shorts and yanks down, bringing Kara’s bikini bottoms with it as she drops to her knees.

And Kara’s eyes go dark and she can't help but smile as she knows what Lena’s about to -

“_Shiiiit_” Kara exhales with a heavy sigh when Lena’s tongue lands and quickly works to find the right spots with the extra gusto of someone trying their very best the first time out of the gate.

And now Kara’s the one left reaching for something to hold onto, her hands gripping for sharp rock to her sides -

Kara suddenly winces from a pain, and Lena looks up in startle, thinking it was something she did.

“Did I-“

“No, no - keep - keep going. Please.” Kara swallows hard. And Lena smiles, seeing how desperate she’s making Kara, who’s usually so in control.

“Here?” she mumbles lightly against her, hands gripping tightly at Kara’s bottom to add extra pressure against her mouth. She even pulls one leg up over her shoulder for angling.

“Mm, can you just- yeah, yeah right there-” Kara practically gasps suddenly, her mouth dropping open as her eyes clench and -

“_Jesus… FUCK!_” echoes in the small cave, thankfully muted by the hard waterfall.

——-

A couple hours and a peaceful second swim to cool down in the pond later, and they’re walking back in quiet contentment, barely saying much on the hike down.

But they hold hands most of the way, fingers interlaced.

Kara’s mind wanders back to the cave, and she smiles, never more grateful for Lena’s random bouts of boldness.

She suddenly shakes her other hand out as if it’s pained - and that’s when Lena notices the blood.

She frowns instantly in concern, stopping and grabbing Kara's other hand.

“When did that happen?!”

“Oh, I - scraped it, on the rocks while you were uh…”

“Oh my God. _Kara_. This is pretty bad. It could get infected.”

“It’s just a scrape. I get ‘em all the time.”

Now Lena understands Kara’s rough hands.

“You’re just going to be one big walking scar by the time you’re sixty, aren’t you?”

Kara shrugs, “It’ll mean I lived.”

“You sound like Ano.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Kara smiles.

“The hotel is closest and they have first aid kits in the gift shop.” Lena says, still examining the wound. Then before Kara can protest further -

“We’re going.” she finishes, practically an order.

And Kara can’t help but find something incredibly sexy about the raven-haired beauty taking charge. Like she did in the cave.

Yes, Kara likes Lena’s random bouts of boldness, indeed.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tricky thing about walls...

Patching Kara’s hand hadn’t taken much time. Well, maybe it took a little longer than it should’ve, as Lena found herself drawing it out a bit because she loved Kara’s hands so much. And cleaning and wrapping the palm of one gave her the chance to admire it with dedicated energy and it not be weird. And she couldn’t help notice how Kara barely even flinched at the cleaning touches, obviously having a high pain threshold. Or maybe she was just showing off. Either way, as Lena worked on fixing her up, she had felt Kara’s unyielding gaze on her, watching her, those deep blues constantly scanning her face and quietly observing Lena's caretaker touches.

Now they stood together in Lena’s hotel room shower, Kara pressed against Lena from behind, her hand tracing patches of freckles on Lena’s pale, wet skin.

There’s exploratory strokes of connected comfort along each other’s back and hips and stomachs. They gently soap each other up, then let warm water help rinse each other off. Kara eventually turns and Lena takes position behind her now, tracing hands across Kara’s muscled back, brushing over every little nick and scar, a lifetime of living on the edge mapped out before her, more visible than ever under the bright white light.

The closeness is just soft and pure and wonderful. Until Lena’s hands linger at the deeper scar she now knows the story of, and Kara turns and kisses Lena with soft intensity, then licks at the inside of her mouth and bites her lip, and something shifts for the both of them - and they eventually wind up with Kara sitting on the shower floor, back against the wall, Lena straddled over her lap, head tilting back in ecstasy and hips desperately undulating as she rides the strong, veiny fingers of Kara’s healthy hand.

Not long after -

Kara and Lena lay in bed together, on their sides, facing each other. Merely inches apart. They’re still. Quiet. They’re both clean now, hair slightly damp, and bodies fully nude, covered by stiff white sheets.

Green and blue stay locked in on each other.

The only movement is the gentle stroke of Kara’s thumb on Lena’s hip. They just exist right here for longest time, lost in the peaceful silence of deep, unwavering gazes. Neither have ever known an intimacy like this.

After an endless unmoving silence, Kara nudges forward a little, kissing Lena gently.

Kara can’t seem to stop kissing Lena. It somehow now rivals surfing for her favorite thing in the world to do. How could it not, as Lena’s face and lips were absolutely perfect. She knew how much Lena lusted for her and had even breathlessly mumbled how “fucking perfect” she was with that mild accent of hers as if she was in shock at the sight of Kara as she ran hands over her abs and across her body during their most recent encounters. But the ironic thing was, to Kara - _Lena_ was the work of art. And her emerald eyes pierced Kara’s soul... whether she wanted that or not. And in return, Kara could read Lena like a book just by looking at her. There was a profound lack of uncertainty with that which was both comforting, and startling. Because it’s like she’d never have to wonder what was on Lena’s mind. Never have to doubt her or question her. She knew Lena loved that Kara could read her. Her every desire, her every need. And so much more. But Kara loved being able to do it, because it was... certain. It was easy. And while yes, Kara was a risk taker in most aspects of her life, she never realized until now how much she wanted something so... safe.

Safety was exactly what Lena was feeling in this moment as well, as the weight of Kara’s bandaged hand rests at her hip. She loved the way Kara opened doors for her. Wrapped towels around her. Put strong arms around her. Took her hand to lead her. Stayed close at all times. When she moved, Kara moved. And when Kara moved, she couldn’t help but follow. She felt like she would never feel as protected and cherished as she did in the presence of Kara Danvers. Kara Danvers who she’d only known a few days yet who somehow knew everything about her through a mere glance. Knew what she needed, at any given moment, and on every level. No one had ever shown her so much patience and care and unyielding affection. It was intoxicating. Addictive. More than that it was fulfilling in a way she never realized she so desperately craved.

Their lips continue to brush and enjoy the feeling of each other, until they finally, gently part.

And blue again meets green. And again they just stare into the depths of each other.

Until Lena’s emeralds shift up, just a little - to the scar.

“You’re dying to know, aren’t you?” Kara teases.

“I’m sorry. You don’t have to.” Lena says.

Kara takes a breath. And she speaks quietly from here.

“Let’s play a game. Total honesty.”

Lena nods.

“What’s your biggest fear?” Kara asks first.

“Dying alone.” Lena answers without hesitation.

“Damn.” Kara frowns.

“You said total honesty.” Lena says. She then wants to ask about the scar, but decides to ease in.

“What’s your middle name?” she asks instead.

“Don’t have one. What’s yours?”

“Kieran.”

The corner of Kara’s lips curl ever so lightly. She obviously thinks it’s beautiful.

Lena glances down between them briefly, before asking her next question.

“How many people have you slept with?”

“You really want to know?”

“It’s not your turn to ask questions.” Lena shoots back.

_Touché_.

Kara looks away from Lena’s face, thinking. Starts to add. Lena can see her mind working. And working.

“That’s too much math, I take it back.”

“No take backs, I gotta answer. I just suck at numbers. What’s twelve times-“

“NO, God. Jesus no. Please, Kara.” Lena lifts a hand between them to stop her from continuing.

Kara can’t help but grin.

“How about an exchange, instead of a take back. And I ask something else.”

Kara nods. Lena hesitates. Fiddles with the lip of the sheet at Kara’s chest.

“You’re - obviously not gay, since you’re also with men-“

“I’m bisexual. Though, I suppose I could be pan, technically. For me it’s about the person. Not the body they come in.”

Lena finds that beautiful. _Kara really is such a free spirit…_

Lena looks down at the sheet bunched in her own fingers.

Kara continues to watch her. Her hand suddenly, gently clasp over Lena’s to halt her fiddling.

“Are you a lesbian, Lena Kieran Luthor?” Kara asks.

Lena’s eyes meet hers once again. And her hand relaxes.

“Yes.” barely escapes her lips.

Tears come to Lena’s eyes, as it’s the first time she’s ever really said it out loud.

Kara leans in and kisses her, sweet and comfortingly. Their foreheads remain close, new intimacy reached.

And then Lena’s other hand lifts and her fingers lightly trace the spot above Kara’s brow, brushing the scar.

Kara closes her eyes.

She sighs slightly, inwardly.

“You don’t have t-“

“My parents died.” Kara says suddenly, only a tiny bit above a whisper, “When I was twelve. I was in the car with them…”

Kara reopens her eyes and they’re slightly tearful, but she holds firm, obviously not one who likes to show weakness.

“I watched them die.” she says, her voice almost cracking.

She swallows emotion down and continues -

“He was in the Navy. She was a nurse. That’s how I was born here. He was stationed in Honolulu. After it happened I was adopted by my godparents, the Danvers. Jeremiah served with my dad. And Eliza was my mom’s best friend. So, it was a good fit. They had a daughter. My sister Alex. We’re close. She lives downtown. She’s a doctor. She’s - the one who pretty much made me retire, more than my own surgeon.” Kara chuckles slightly at thoughts of her sister, but still looks sad despite the partial smile. Her jaw sets again.

“Sorry, I don’t talk about this stuff - ever. ‘Cause when I do... I see it. I see the truck that came across at the exact perfect moment. I see the broken window, coated in red where my mom was ejected. I hear my dad saying it’s going to be okay before choking on his own blood… and I hear the silence when he stops. And then it’s quiet. For the longest time. It’s just… so quiet…”

Again her jaw clenches, as if trying to will tears from escaping as she relives the devastating, suffocating feeling of being trapped in the car ...and utterly alone.

But it doesn’t stop Lena’s tears, which roll down her cheek as she leans forward -

And gently, ever so slowly kisses Kara’s scar, breathing in as her lips remain pressed to Kara's skin. And Kara’s eyes close and she sinks into it. And as Lena’s lips finally, lightly drag away - Kara exhales.

“Kara, I am so sorry.” Lena says breathlessly, their foreheads touching now.

Kara pulls Lena closer, embracing and appreciating the comfort.

And they remain this way for the longest time.

Until both doze off in a much-needed slumber.

——-

An hour later they’re awoken by a POUNDING at the door.

They both bolt upright, frowning curiously, and Kara especially looks ready for a fight, reaching a hand protectively across Lena before being ready to shove up and run naked as hell for the door, until -

“LENNAAA!” comes the screeches, followed by group laughter.

Lena relaxes, but only a little, putting a calming hand on Kara’s arm to stop her from rushing out of bed.

“It’s my friends.” she says with an annoyed sigh.

“Oh. Um… I can- I can hide on the balcony.“ she says, reaching for the towel at the end of the bed.

“No.” Lena says suddenly, a frown still on her face, until it relaxes and she calms, “No. Don’t.”

Kara looks at her, sees the peaceful resolution on Lena’s face. Seems surprised by it.

Lena climbs out of bed instead, pulling on a thick white hotel robe as the ruckus outside continues with more demanding beats on the door.

She takes a brief breath - and opens it.

“Yes?” Lena asks with mild annoyance.

But of course they just blast past her like blockbusters, piling in as a group, Nia with them.

“Bitch we been texting you all day! Had to be sure you’re alive and not up here working on your damn magaz-” Lucy says, leading the charge past Lena into the room until -

She hits the brakes and there’s a five woman pile up behind her.

And all mouths are dropped open and eyes are wide.

Nia’s agape lips break into a smile, “YES!” she blurts with a single exhaling laugh, as if she’s impressed and proud as hell.

Lena’s an exceptional shade of red, but has barely moved from her spot by the door.

Kara just sits calmly on the bed, arms casually on bent knees, sheet barely covering her chest as she offers a slight salute of acknowledgment to the group.

“Oh my God…” Sam interjects desperately, yanking at the other girls.

Lucy of course avoids her grip - “But I see you’re working on something _else_.” she says absolutely beaming with a shocked grin.

Sam looks at Lena ready to apologize, but Lena just glances down to the ground.

“Can I help you ladies?” she asks, maintaining composure.

“No. We’ll leave. Lucy. Let’s go. Lena, I’m so sorry.” she says, terrified Lena may never forgive her for this.

“Screw that! We’re bored and it’s our last day before tomorrow’s rehearsal. That’s why we were here, but now I’m realizing this is perfect because - ” Lucy rambles, her head whipping back towards the blonde in the bed.

“Kara. Any suggestions?”

Lena’s head tilts in disbelief. Sam facepalms. Lucy continues -

“We’ve worked our way through Sam’s little tourist to-do list. What about you? What can five semi-single ladies plus a bride-to-be do around here?”

“I’m sure you know what spots to hit.” Nia chimes in. Sam looks at her as if to say ‘not you too’. Nia just grins.

“Oh, I’m sure she does.” Lucy says suggestively.

Nia realizes how she set that right up, looks to Lena and stifles an apologetic smile.

Lena blushes more and brings a slightly annoyed hand to her forehead. Lucy may be right about Kara, _and then some_ \- but still.

Kara finally has to help the situation.

“Um - have you tried Hanauma Bay? Beautiful spot. Tourist friendly. Lotsa turtles.”

“OHH _SEA TURTLES!!_” Nia’s eyes go wide like a kid and that’s it - that’s definitely what they’re doing.

Lucy smacks Sam’s arm.

“Turtles, Sam?! How come you didn’t have Hanauma Bay on the list!”

Sam’s at a loss. This whole situation’s a little crazy and she hasn’t been able to stop glancing at Lena who will barely look at her.

“You two should come!” Lucy says, deliberately taking a pause, “_With us_.” she finishes slyly, always full of dirty nods.

“Okay. That’s it. We’re leaving. For Hanauma Bay, apparently, and you two - stay. Just stay here, and - enjoy each other’s company. While you still can.” the last part is said with a light chuckle, meant casually and matter of fact.

“Already doing _that_.” Lucy jokes.

But Sam’s comment seems to strike Kara, and she glances down.

Lucy gets a harsh shove towards the door, courtesy of Sam who’s had enough. She wrangles them all and waves everyone out.

“I’ll see you at tomorrow’s rehearsaaaaal.” Sam sing-songs over her shoulder to Lena on her way out, forcible getting the others through the door as they stifle giggles.

“Sam, wait!” Lena says suddenly.

Sam closes the door behind the girls, shutting it right in the face of Lucy who hilariously tries to poke back in.

“Em, the wedding. Would you mind if - Kara joined me?”

Sam looks from Lena to Kara and back again, obviously surprised by Lena’s request.

“That is - if she’d like to come with me. As my date.”

Kara’s eyebrows raise. This was certainly unexpected. She’s unsure how to react, but because it’s Lena and she’s asked and there’s a witness -

“Uh… yeah. I’d - I’d love that. If there’s room.” Kara says, looking to Sam.

“_We’ll make room_.” Sam says quick with conviction, before giving Lena a brief glance and proud squeeze of her arm.

They never see Kara look down and swallow a bit too hard. 

And then Sam exits and Lena’s flopping back onto the bed with a newfound excitement. She’s _glowing_.

Kara can’t help but watch her sit there, grinning. She knows what a big step going public is for Lena. And she’s proud of her. Still - Lena's leaving on Monday. And the reality of this has started to settle in for Kara, even more than it’d already been sneaking up on her, though Lena seems oblivious. Kara figures maybe Lena’s just in denial. Because despite leaving in a couple days, she’d yet to bring it up. And that begins to worry her even more. Lena making this grand gesture, willing to be out together - it reminded her of the woman who’d swore to leave her husband for Kara after a single night together. Only this was on another level. This was someone’s heart involved now, so she felt even more terrible.

Kara had pulled Lena in. Made her feel safe enough to explore herself and come out to people for the first time in her life. Lena had let her in, fully and completely. And Kara hadn’t just broken her own rules, she’d dragged Lena down with her. And now a heavy guilt was setting in.

Or maybe all this concern for Lena was an excuse, something she was just telling herself.

Because Lena had pulled Kara in. Made her feel safe enough to expose herself and open up to someone for the first time in her life. Kara had let her in, fully and completely. And Kara hadn’t just broken own her rules, she’d blown them all to hell. So now that heavy guilt swirls together with self-hate.

“So it _seems_ all I have to worry about is the rehearsal dinner tomorrow night, and even that’s only a couple hours…” Lena rambles before trailing off, eye brow raised in interest, letting Kara know she wants to spend every moment of her with her.

Kara suddenly shifts, “Oh. Uh -“ she closes her eyes a moment as if something just hit her. “I’m so sorry I forgot to tell you, but Ruby texted me last night. Our lessons got bumped. She got a last minute spot at a comp coming up. A prelim in Maui. I promised her we’d train before tonight. And… again tomorrow.”

Lena’s face drops in disappointment.

“Oh - em… of course. I’ve been dominating all your time haven’t I?” she says, with an apologetic tilt of her head.

Kara offers a reassuring, toothless smile, “It’s okay. I just care about these kids, you know.”

Lena softens again, “I know. That’s part of what I -“ she stops herself, “-Admire about you.” she finishes.

They both know that’s not what she really wanted to say. And something about it finally breaks something deep inside Kara, but she hides it well, especially when Lena’s leaning over and kissing her.

“How much longer til you have to go?” Lena asks, keeping her face close.

_Now_. _Now_. _It has to be now_, Kara tries to tell herself. _Make it quick. Rip the bandaid_.

That’s the tricky thing about walls… once they come down, survival instinct is to build them back up.

_Now now now now_ echoes again and again in Kara’s mind -

“Couple hours.” escapes, despite herself. She can’t help it. The smell and feel of Lena’s body pressing closer and closer destroys her resolve, and she silently curses her own lack of control as an oblivious Lena grins and pushes her back, crawling over onto her.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Lena and Sam sweetness, plus a little Luthor Mama drama.

The last day and a half had been one of the longest of Lena’s life. When Kara had left after that last romp, Lena felt just fine. She felt _amazing_, actually. She was excited for Sunday and as was always the case with Kara, she left Lena completely satiated with a buzzing fullness and warmth from head to toe. She never knew this feeling was possible before Kara. _She never knew a lot of things were possible before Kara…_ So as she stood alone against the door that had just shut, she was feeling absolutely freaking amazing.

And then an hour passed as she'd piddled around her hotel room. Checked some emails. Had a snack. Even turned on the TV, which she rarely watched.

After two hours, she'd texted Sam to find out what the girls were up to. As expected and suggested by Kara, they were at Hanauma Bay. Sam said the offer still stood to join them, if she wanted. But somehow seeing sea turtles with anyone but Kara hadn’t sounded like something she wanted to do. Oahu was such a beautiful place, but with Kara, it was different. The thick Pacific breeze. The sway of palm trees. The sound of crashing waves. With Kara, it was all heightened. And enjoying any of it without her now seemed wrong somehow. Pointless.

The rest of the day and evening had passed so slowly, and Lena had thought she might lose her mind. She’d tried going to the pool, but seeing couples and families had only made her miss Kara more. She’d tried going down to the restaurant for dinner, but again - the same story. She’d even tried to meet up with Sam, but she was having a special dinner with Jack’s family.

Lena had gotten so bored and desperate, she almost texted Lucy. Until she realized she’d probably try to drag her to some local club and quickly abandoned that idea.

And then - the night was even worse. Since being with Kara, she’d slept harder than she had in her life. Kara made sure of that by absolutely wiping her out. She'd now realized she could barely sleep without Kara first exhausting her body, and then wrapping herself around Lena like a warm blanket. JJ was right - Kara Danvers really was like a drug. Once was all it took to be addicted. But Lena had been a lucky rare person to get more than one taste. To be ravaged and worshiped by Kara again and again - and again. And because of that, she knew she was absolutely doomed. Doomed to squirm alone in bed, longing for those fingers to be on her. _In_ her.

The feeling of Kara's fingertips was like a phantom against her skin and it had suddenly felt like she hadn’t been with Kara for weeks. And yet it had only been one damn night. Around 4 AM, Lena had finally given up and snaked a hand down into her slick bottoms and worked herself to the thought of Kara, picturing her strong hands massaging her breasts as her tongue lapped and curled and undulated against her in all the right places. She’d groaned out Kara’s name and followed it with some expletives in a panting breath as if desperate for Kara to help bring her over the edge, only Kara wasn’t there. And she couldn’t quite get herself to the point needed, which had never happened before. Lena had been taking care of herself for most her life, so the stifling nature of a self-pleasure struggle was infuriating.

Lena had even rolled over and stuffed a pillow low and tried to thrust out something in desperation, one hand grabbing the headboard as she rolled her hips and tried to grind it out, her other hand even practically vibrating against herself to try to help - but still she couldn’t quite reach the peak she sought, as it was nothing compared to Kara's firm thigh or abs or her hard palm or soft mouth or any other part of her she'd ground against the last few days. She just couldn’t get there at all. And she’d eventually thrown the pillow off the bed in a huff. Kara really had ruined her... in the best way.

And so Lena had finally fallen over onto the bed and shaken her head at herself and laughed with a hand to her flushed forehead. And then she’d picked up her phone and texted Kara, biting her lip before pressing send on -

_“You’ve ruined me. I can’t even get off without you.”_

She’d hoped Kara would still be up to see it and she’d get a knock on her door within the hour, Kara rushing right over to throw her to the bed and help her find the release she’d been fighting for an hour to reach. Or at the very least, text back in a couple hours when she’d awoken for her early morning surf, hopefully asking if she could come over.

Instead, she’d finally received a text from Kara - when she was at a late breakfast with Sam and the others. That's how long it had taken. And it was a simple wink emoji. That’s it. Then the bubbles popped up like Kara was typing something else. Then they stopped like she’d changed her mind. Then they re-appeared and said _“Sorry for not texting sooner. Been busy with Ruby.”_

Lena couldn’t be upset by that, of course. Disappointed, sure. But it checked out and so she’d forced herself to try to focus on Sam for the rest of the day. She convinced herself this was simply a great opportunity to be a better friend to Sam, given that she’d practically blown her off for most the trip to spend time with Kara. Thus, she refocused all of her energy on her best friend, and it was almost a good enough distraction. _Almost_.

So now, as she sits with Sam at the tail end of their rehearsal dinner and everyone else heads back to their rooms as Jack says goodnight to his parents -

Lena stares at her phone on the table and she takes a swig of her drink to give herself the courage to snatch it up -

_“Almost done here, any chance to see you tonight?”_ she sends to Kara quickly before she can talk herself out of it.

More typing bubbles. Finally -

_“Shopping downtown with Alex. Threw out all my event clothes. Probably won’t be back til late. See you at the venue.”_

And just like that Lena realizes she’ll be spending a second night alone and won’t see Kara until the wedding tomorrow, because she wasn't about to intrude on Kara's time with her sister, nor had she been asked to. And she almost breaks in half. Nevermind the increasing ache between her legs, her stomach actually churns and her heart actually sinks at the thought of yet again not being able to feel her presence, hear her voice, stare into her deep blue eyes.

And that’s when it really hits Lena, more than ever - she’s unequivocally in love with Kara Danvers. She’s in fact _so_ in love with the woman, that the idea of being away from her for two nights in a row threatens to shatter her from the inside out.

“You okay, babe?” Sam asks, noticing Lena's mood.

Lena half sighs, unsure how to respond to that.

“Figured you’d be rushing off to meet a certain blonde water goddess by now.”

Lena half smiles at that, though there's a sight sadness to her gaze.

“What is it? Did something happen? Did she blow you off?” Sam practically demands, face looking as if she's ready to fight Kara. She'd lose in a second of course, but she'd sure as hell try for her best friend, and Lena appreciated the protectiveness.

“No. I don’t _think_ so... I just…”

Sam squints at her.

“It’s silly.” Lena shakes her head.

“Lena. Come on. What is it?”

“I miss her, Sam." Lena finally admits, "I - I don’t want to be alone again tonight. Not now that I know what it’s like to be with her.”

Sam stares at her and a smile teases at the corner of her lips.

“Wow. Lena. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were in love with this woman.”

When Lena won’t make eye contact, Sam gasps.

“Oh my God, Lena…” Sam says in realization, knowing now that she _is_.

“Is that crazy? Am I crazy?”

“Yes. Honestly, I think you might be. But, in a completely wonderful way.” she assures before Lena can panic too much.

Silence passes between them as Sam bites her lip, trying to figure this out for Lena, and she hasn't a clue where to begin. “What are you gonna do though? I mean... you’re leaving on Monday.”

Lena’s head tilts. Then Sam realizes.

“Oh my God, you’re thinking of staying.” 

“Not - _staying_, staying. She hasn’t asked, and I wouldn’t presume… I just… I need more time, Sam. I was thinking maybe just an extra day or two. Just til Wednesday. To figure things out. To talk to her. See what she wants to do.”

“Well, she wants to do _you_, clearly.” Sam jokes with a glint in her eyes.

“_Sam_.”

Sam chuckles, “Lena, look I couldn't presume to know where _her_ head is at, but if she’s anywhere _near_ where you are, she probably feels the same. She’s probably just waiting on you to say something.”

“Maybe... she _has_ let me set the pace on, _everything_, really. She's amazing like that." Lena gazes off at the moon as she considers, "But - she also jumps right in, Sam, in so many ways. Says whatever she’s thinking or feeling. She doesn’t hesitate. She doesn’t doubt.”

“Beauty, brawn _and_ bravery? You really hit the lotto with this one.” Sam says, impressed. 

Lena grins. She knows she has. Then Sam leans forward and takes her hand, “So did she.”

Lena’s touched. Their heads both tilt in affection. Then Sam squeezes a little tighter and gets a mischievous idea.

“Listen, Jack was gonna get his own room for our last night before the wedding - tradition and all that shit - but what if I just stayed with you instead? Girls night. You and me. Our last as two single women. We won’t tell Lucy.”

Lena laughs, “Seriously? Oh, Sam that would be amazing!” she says in relief. With Sam by her side all night, Lena knows she can stay distracted and thankfully not wind up pointlessly humping a damn pillow in yet another failed attempt to satiate her Kara craving.

——-

By midnight, they’d had enough night caps and laughs and reminiscing to last a lifetime and things were finally settling down around 1 AM. Sam was fresh out of the shower in a fluffy robe, while Lena sits in her pajamas at a chair by the desk, briefly typing at her laptop.

“You better not kick me all night like you did when we took that trip to Cabo.” Sam says as she flops down onto the bed.

“I only kicked you because you are physically incapable of staying on your side. Poor Jack is doomed to spend the rest of his life sleeping on ten inches.”

“That doesn’t sound bad at all, I’m kinda jealous.”

Lena realizes the suggestive nature of the comment. Throws the pillow that’s stuffed behind her back over at Sam - nails her right in the face as Sam cackles.

Then Lena grows more serious and Sam can sense it.

“What? What are you doing, anyway?” she asks curiously, scooting off the bed and approaching to look at the screen.

She sees a YouTube video pulled up, and not yet played. The title: “Kara Danvers Wipe Out”

“What’s this?”

“Something I haven’t been able to bring myself to watch. Kara told me all about it and I’ve wanted to watch since I met her, but... I just don’t know if I can press play.”

“Okay, well - what happens if you don’t?”

Lena considers this with a deep frown.

“As crazy as it sounds, Sam, I think I need to.”

Sam takes this in. Nods with resolution.

“Then let’s watch it.” Sam says firmly, dragging the other chair around to take position next to Lena.

Lena stares at her best friend. _God, she loves her._

Sam gives Lena's knee a squeeze.

Lena then focuses and takes a breath. She faces the screen once again.

“Okay.” Lena says, barely above a whisper.

“Okay.” Sam repeats with strength.

Lena’s fingers finally slide forward - and click.

What plays in front of her eyes is the longest ten minutes of her life. It’s ten minutes of shock and horror, during which both she and Sam go through a series of emotions, most of which resembled being mortified, all the while Lena can barely breathe.

It starts innocently enough - Kara doing her thing with precision after waiting on the perfect wave and receiving it. Except the wave is the largest Lena’s ever seen. It’s frightening. _Menacing_. Yet Kara drops into it like it’s nothing, with all the skill and experience of a six time champion - but within a fraction of a second after catching it, before her board can even out for the ride - she’s sent forward in a blink and you miss it flash, so violently you can almost hear the sickening strike of skin meeting water surface, despite the angry roar of the ocean and gasps of the crowd.

Lena’s mouth drops like she’s been punched in the gut, and Sam’s hand comes to her own instinctively, eyes wide in shock.

For a millisecond after, all they see is feet - until the massive wave fully consumes her, and it’s as if Kara never existed.

There’s no sign of her.

No visible struggle.

She’s just... _gone_.

But her board suddenly appears like it’s in a washing machine as more waves come crashing overheard to stir the already hellish brutality.

And then her board pokes upright out of the water, tossing and bobbing up and down, which Lena knows must be due to the caught leash.

And she feels ill as she knows Kara is getting brutalized under the water now, by wave after wave after wave and Lena’s never hated the ocean before but she does in this moment.

“_Jesus_…” Sam gasps out.

And then the leash must have torn because the board breaks free and fires into the the air like a rocket, flipping and rotating from the sheer force of the release and surface-driven wind.

And Lena's stomach drops further.

And they keep watching, unable to look away as - for seven more agonizing minutes, during which Lena barely breathes herself - rescuers on jet skis circle the area and try to get to her without risking their own lives.

One finally dives in when there’s a brief calm in the spot she’d gone under. He emerges a few moments later with her in his gasp.

Before he can reach the jet ski that brought him in, it has to peel out when another wave starts to build. He yanks from harm's way just in time, but Kara and the rescuer are stuck in place and the force ROCKS THEM - sending both back under again.

“Oh my God.” Sam says, shaking her head in disbelief.

Lena’s still silent as the rescuer pops back up with Kara still in hand and apparently the slam somehow woke her up because the person behind the camera talks about how they see movement and she must be awake and they can’t believe it.

Lena finally thinks maybe the worst is over -

Until the jet ski hauls ass and skids up onto wet sand, and as it does, as Kara is held in place on the board attached to the jet ski by the man who’d pulled her out -

It’s the worst sight yet.

Kara, with shoulder bloody and body scraped - clutches a fist at her chest, her whole long, lean form lurched and the veins in her neck and face strained in sheer tortuous agony as she clearly can’t breathe. And the suffering is unimaginable.

Neither Lena nor Sam have ever seen someone in so much pain.

And then she draws eerily still and her body goes limp just as paramedics arrive. And it’s all worried figures and staff blocking the view from there as the scene becomes chaos and an ambulance makes its way through a parting crowd and she can barely make out the image of one of the EMTs doing violent chest compressions on Kara.

And then the video ends.

And before another version of the same horrible thing can auto-play -

Sam slams the laptop shut.

And they both sit in silence, tears in Lena’s eyes but none falling as she’s just stunned into stillness while Sam hangs her head and closes her eyes, swallowing it all down.

“That was…” Sam can’t even find the words.

_Horrible. Brutal. Sickening_. The descriptions all seem to fit. But one word in particular comes to Lena’s mind: Unfair.

She understands now how Kara has no clue what went wrong, because she saw no evidence of anything, which even she could tell, despite not knowing much about the sport but having watched enough of Kara in real life and on video by now to gather what made a successful ride. It truly was just a freak accident.

And it was just. So. Fucking. _Unfair_.

For someone as good and kind and full of light as Kara Danvers, it just seemed so unfair on top of everything else she’d already been through. So much loss and pain. Her parents taken from her because they were driving in the exact wrong place at the exact wrong time. Her mentor John taken from her unexpectedly due to an unknown condition. Her career and damn near life taken from her by the ocean she loved and a wave that should've been conquered like any other before it. It just didn’t seem fair at all. Kara would probably just say “_that’s life_”, but Lena was offended by the fates on her behalf - though to their credit, they did bring them together.

Still, she can’t believe what Kara went through. And that she’s still here. And Lena knows her. And _loves_ her. And now, having seen that video - Lena can’t help the rush of protectiveness that suddenly washes over her.

“She’s incredible.” Sam’s voice finally snaps Lena from her many thoughts. “To have survived that. She’s an incredible woman.”

A tear finally breaks and rolls down Lena’s cheek. She wipes it away quick and nods, “Yes. She is.”

Then Lena considers something, and finally - 

“Sam do you think... do you think you could give me a minute? I need to make a call.”

Sam smiles, assuming she's calling Kara, “Of course. I wanted to go say goodnight to Jack anyway.” she says pushing up, then hollering over shoulder as she heads for the door -

“Our last real good night before we start grunting something resembling it from opposite sides of the bed as a married couple for the rest of our lives.”

Lena chuckles and smiles in gratitude as Sam slips out.

She then takes a moment to adjust herself and run a hand through her hair. She then re-opens the laptop and dials a number on FaceTime.

“My goodness Lena, it’s barely morning.”The voice speaks firm and almost silky.

Lena’s mother Lillian sits on screen, a yellow morning light behind her. She squints a bit from the brightness of it, a cup of tea in hand.

“I’m sorry mother, did I wake you?”

“Of course not it’s after six. My instructor comes by at seven, you know that.”

“You’re still taking those classes?” Lena tries, attempting to go along with the random pleasantries as if they talk every day. Which they definitely do not. They haven't talked in weeks, actually.

“Yes, why wouldn’t I? Never thought I’d be a fan of pilates, to be honest. But it keeps me fresh.” she finishes with a sip of tea, before her brow furrows at the sight of Lena finally really registering through the screen, “And you look quite the same. That trip must be doing you well.”

Lena holds back a smile, “Yes, Mother it’s… it's been life changing.” she exhales in honesty.

“_Hawaii_ -_ life changing_? With all the humidity and hula skirts and beans in shaved ice. Did you know they put beans in their shaved ice, Lena?”

Lena finally smiles, “Yes, Mother. And it’s just as disgusting as you’d imagine.”

Lillian offers her a humored half smile, but it’s clear she has other things to be doing. As always.

“Did you need something darling?” she says with a twinge of accusation, trying to move the conversation to its end before it’s even really gotten started.

“No. I-“ Lena starts to stutter, used to being dismissed by her mother often enough. But then she catches herself, “Yes. Actually. I wanted to talk to you about…” she swallows, then it comes as a blurt, “I’m considering staying.”

“Extending your trip?” Lillian asks, barely paying attention as she refills her cup. And before Lena can clarify -

“Why on Earth would you do that?” she finishes with a disgusted face of judgement.

A long moment of silence passes. Lena takes a quick breath -

“I met someone.”

This finally gets Lillian’s attention, as Lena continues - 

“A surfer. _Former_ surfer.” 

“A surfer…” Lillian says, now with that judgement oozing from her voice to accompany, “And what do they do now?”

_Here we go._

“Are you really going to make this about money?” Lena sighs.

Lillian shrugs as if it’s obvious -

“A simple Google of your name and anyone can see you have a successful magazine you built from the ground up.” 

Lena internally notes the irony that _now_ is when her mother actually expresses pride in her accomplishments. Until she ruins it, of course, as she finishes -

“And that you come from… _moderate_ privilege.”

Lena shoots back -

“And a simple Google of their name and you’d see they’ve won many championships, at one time had numerous multi million dollar endorsement deals, and were an early investor in a popular organic beverage company which has set them up for life. Money isn’t important to them, Mother. Not just because they have it but because they know better. They live in a one room bungalow with a faulty breaker and drive a refurbished Jeep. They prefer poi to pellegrino, and beer to perignon.”

“_Such class_.” Lillian half-jests, then shifts, trying to let herself be okay with the fact that at least this person has their own money.

“So does this beach bum millionaire have a name, or am I to assume he comes running when you blow a conch shell?”

“Kara.” Lena says without a moment’s hesitation. Then she takes a breath.

“_Her_ name - is Kara.”

Her mother barely moves. The muscles in her neck shifting from a hard swallow is the only indication the video connection hasn’t frozen.

Lillian suddenly shuts her laptop, sending Lena’s screen to black.

And just like that, Lena's eyes fill again and she brings a handto her face and clenches her lids shut, tears falling now as she thinks she may never hear from her own mother again. Which though expected, still wrecks her.

But then - the ringing of an incoming FaceTime startles her from that despair.

She frowns curiously. Wipes her face dry. Answers.

Lillian just sits there on the screen, fingers lightly playing and tugging at the tiny gold cross around her neck.

She searches for words. Hasn’t even made eye contact yet.

Lena waits on bated breath.

“Are you avoiding sunburn? You look a bit pinked and you know have to be careful with that skin.” she finally says in half admonishment, still not looking at Lena, and instead just sipping her tea.

Lena’s heart cracks open in relief - because Lillian is talking to her. She may be pretending they didn’t just have a conversation about Lena being with a woman, and in all likelihood they may never speak on it again. But at least she’s _talking_ to her. And showing _concern_, no less. That’s more than she thought she might ever have after her confession.

It’s _something_. Something to build upon. _And she’ll take it_.

And as her mother begins to tell Lena about the divorcing neighbors' particularly nasty disagreement yesterday before letting her know she needs to log off and get ready for her trainer - Lena can’t help but smile. She can't stop thinking about how the pieces of her life seem to be falling together, and how the decision to stay an extra two days so she can talk to Kara about considering a permanent relocation is the right one.

And thus once again, and now more than ever, she can’t wait to see Kara tomorrow.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is a wedding even a wedding without angst and smut?
> 
> PS - Kara's suit is basically [this](https://ibb.co/BCR8YMX).

Kara’s jeep rolls to a stop in a line of parked guests down a long dirt road. She steps out, heels hitting dust as she closes the door behind her, revealing a form-fitting light gray suit with a silver silk collar blouse that’s deeply open revealing tanned bare cleavage, which might be inappropriate if this wasn’t a beach wedding. At her sternum rests her mother’s necklace, long and platinum with a beautiful blue gemstone in the middle. Her sun kissed hair is in loose waves, coolly pinned back at one side. Her makeup is mostly natural with the slightest hint of a smokey eye. And her nerves are on overdrive.

She doesn’t move yet. She just hangs back at her jeep, watching other guests arrive and head for the setup down the road.

And she thinks back on the last day and a half since she’s seen Lena’s face.

After leaving her at the hotel, Kara had gone home and texted Ruby. She felt like it was the only way not to be a complete liar. So they'd met up and Kara had spent the late afternoon providing some last minute training and advice, though the whole time she’d found it difficult to concentrate to the point where Ruby had even asked if she was okay. She’d lied again. Apparently that was becoming something she did now. Kara didn’t lie, usually. She was always brazenly honest. So this recent reliance on deception didn’t set well with her at all. It ate at her all evening and well into the night. And she couldn’t sleep. The combo of guilt at the empty spot in the bed next to her kept her tossing and turning. She'd always loved an empty bed. She’d always valued her space and silence. Until Lena’s body somehow fit perfectly beside her. And the sound of her slumbered breathing somehow fit right in with the nightly chorus of cricket chirps, pacific winds, and crashing surf.

That night she’d gotten a text at 4 AM and her stomach had dropped at the sight of _“You’ve ruined me. I can’t even get off without you.”_

And below her stomach had throbbed at the mental image of Lena touching herself. Of her basically asking Kara to come assist. The desire to rush right over to throw Lena to the bed and help her find the release was damn near impossible to resist. The pull was worse than a rip current and she found herself struggling against it. So she quickly turned off her phone and rolled over and buried her face in the pillow. And she didn’t text back until she’d cleansed herself of the residual yearning thanks to an early morning session with Ruby where she joined her in the water and together they rode harsh waves and battled intense surf.

But once they were done, the day was long and torturous and she missed the sound of Lena’s voice and the stunning look of her emerald eyes in a reflective sun. And just when she thought she might break and call her - she’d called Alex instead. She’d called her while rummaging through her closet and realizing she had nothing appropriate for a fancy, touristy wedding.

She’d driven the hour to Honolulu and met up with her sister and they’d shopped for what felt like eternity because Kara could hardly pay attention, mind constantly elsewhere. And Alex had noticed. She always noticed. She also noticed when she’d gotten a _“Almost done here, any chance to see you tonight?”_ text and hesitated to respond. Then she'd finally texted back and delayed the inevitable for one more night, telling her she’d just see her at the wedding.

“That her?” Alex had asked.

Kara half nodded and tucked the phone away, resuming an unenthusiastic browsing for outfit options, while Alex looked with more purpose.

“Don’t do it, Kar.” Alex finally said.

Kara had looked at her oddly.

“Don’t do what I did with Maggie. Don’t push her away.”

And Kara sighed and rolled her eyes as she’d warned, “That’s not what’s happening here. I haven't even known her a full week.”

"Still longer than you keep most people around. And hell, I mean I’ve barely been able to reach you for days. Kara you’ve let this woman become your whole world, and now you’re going to her best friend’s _wedding_-“

Kara had then given her a ‘don't start’ look that shut her up. And had Alex yielded, hands shot up, knowing not to push. Yet.

So she’d just kept shopping, until Alex finally asked -

“So what are we going for here, anyway? Butch or femme? You’re somehow able to pull both off annoyingly well.” she finished with a twinge of humored jealousy, “Wait, you know that dress you wore to the ESPYS, what about something like that?”

Alex kept digging around, “Still can’t believe you threw that one away, it was so soft and pretty.” she pouts.

“I didn’t throw it away, it was auctioned for charity.” Kara said, checking out a long gown and inwardly sighing.

“Great, of course you did. Thanks for making me feel like an asshole.” Alex said with a forced toothy grin, teasing.

But Kara didn’t play along, which was new for her.

Alex had watched her searching with barely any effort or care for another minute before finally trying -

“Did mom and dad ever tell you how long they were together before he proposed? One week. They knew each other for _one week_ before he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.”

Kara had immediately glanced at the dressing room and grabbed the nearest dress off a rack, knowing she needed an escape from Alex’s attempt. Then she’d stopped, just outside the curtain.

“You know how long my parents knew each other? Their whole lives. They were childhood friends. High school sweethearts. They knew each other like the back of their own hand. And they knew they’d spend the rest of their lives together.”

Alex’s face had started to strain, knowing where she was going, as Kara’s jaw set and voice dropped with a cold finality -

“And then they died.”

Tears threatened Alex’s eyes.

“Nothing lasts, Alex.” Kara had huffed.

And then she’d disappeared behind the curtain. And Alex’s heart had broken. 

So now as Kara stands staring at the wedding venue ahead, she’s hesitant to take a step closer.

Until her phone buzzes and it’s her.

_“You here?”_ Lena asks.

She sends back a thumbs up. Takes a breath. And then a step.

——-

Lena hands her phone to the petite but ballsy blonde wedding planner who’s quickly collecting them because she’s “Not about to have bridesmaids TikToking during the ceremony”.

Kara had thankfully just replied with a thumbs up, though Lena doesn’t see her amidst the crowd just yet.

“Thank youuu.” the little blonde sing songs as -

“Cat!” Sam calls from down the hall.

Cat spins on her sharp heels and power walks in her power suit, rushing to the bride who needed her as she shoved the cell phones she’d collected at a her poor curly blonde assistant Eve, who fumbles to hold onto them all.

Lena turns away from the chaotic scene behind her to peer outside. She fiddles with the flowers in her hand and nervously adjusts the cleavage of her champagne chiffon jumpsuit. The wind whips by as she and the other bridesmaids wait by the building, about to begin the ceremony. As she spots guests struggling outside with their skirts getting caught by the Pacific breeze, she’s grateful that Sam had been smart enough not to put them in dresses.

She then turns when she sees Sam finally approaching down the hall behind, looking at her with a huge grin and slight nerves, eyes wide as her father stands nearby. Lena smiles back and gives Sam a nod of firm confidence and Sam seems to breathe and relax a little.

Suddenly they’re being “_go go go_”d as soft music starts to play and Cat touches an earpiece.

And everything happens quick from there, as bridesmaids start to make their way down the aisle, accompanied by the men of honor. Lucy is escorted by a large hunk of a man named James with whom she’d already been flirting all morning. Nia is walked by a shorter man Jack worked with who’s nickname was "Dox" and they seemed to be shyly exchanging smiles most of the day.

And now Lena stood as a short, slim young man with kind but mischievous eyes, floppy dark hair and a slight scruffy attempt at a goatee extends his arm politely. It's Jack’s adopted little brother. “Ready?” Adam asks with a genuine smile.

She takes his arm and nods and they’re both practically shoved right outside by Cat even though they were already on their way.

“She’s intense.” he jokes quietly and Lena stifles a grin.

Until they round the corner outside and just before they start to make their way down the aisle towards the alter near the edge of the cliff overlooking the ocean -

She spots her at the end of a middle row.

Kara stands in a gorgeous, form-fitting gray suit that contrasts perfectly against deep bronze cleavage. Sun-kissed waves are pulled back at one side. She's in more makeup than Lena's ever seen on her, yet still not a lot. And she looks absolutely sexy as hell - but also breathtakingly beautiful, somehow again displaying that perfect balance of masculine and feminine she always seems to find that makes her completely irresistible.

And she can see the muscles tense in her long neck as Kara takes a deep breath at the sight of her.

Because Kara is nearly floored by the image of Lena in her champagne jumpsuit which accents a perfect chest and mixes flawlessly with her porcelain complexion, soft makeup and raven hair pulled back into a perfect ponytail.

Watching Lena escorted down the aisle, making her way closer and closer - makes Kara’s heart ache.

And with every step, their eyes never leave each others. They’re fully locked in, both intoxicated by the sight of the other.

Until Lena passes and Kara swallows and looks down to the grass, trying to regain her composure and resolve, trying to force herself to just enjoy the ceremony and not think about everything else.

Which is only made harder when she takes a seat and finds Lena staring at her from the alter.

Lena only looks away from Kara when the bridal march kicks in and Kara has to stand again and turn away, as everyone watches Sam make her way down the aisle.

And the rest of the ceremony is spent with Lena unable to take her eyes off Kara and Kara struggling to look anywhere else but Lena, though she’s unable. She can’t help it. Neither can. They can only focus on each other as the declarations of love are recited and vows are exchanged.

And Kara’s heart absolutely shatters when they get to “as long as we both shall live” and finally she breaks Lena’s gaze and looks down, shutting her eyes and flashing back to the image of her parents from the old wedding photo she keeps stored away.

And she can’t look at Lena again for the rest of the ceremony as Sam and Jack are declared husband and wife, and kiss, and everyone cheers.

Lena notes Kara’s seemingly pained expression and a frown of concern comes across her own face - until the crowd starts cheering and Lena’s snapped out of it and claps for her best friend who grins wildly at her, and Lena is so full of happiness that it distracts.

——-

The reception was in full swing, held in a large white tent by the beach, complete with fancy white lights stung up and white and champagne colored floral arrangements everywhere.

Lena still hadn’t been able to approach Kara, having been pulled away after the ceremony for Cat’s incredibly specific and unnecessarily demanding instructions for the poor photographer as they took shots of the wedding party. At one point when Cat had seemed frustrated with the shots they were getting of the newly wed couple, Sam had suggested Lena take the camera so she did and she took a few snaps and Cat actually loved them and joked how she should’ve hired her and had her just do double duty. The actual photographer did not look pleased and Lena had smiled apologetically. Then she was dragged back to Sam’s chambers to help her change into her reception gown, getting caught up in celebratory private champagne toasts with the rest of the party. Throughout the whole thing, she was beyond thrilled and excited for Sam, but also thinking mostly of Kara, desperate to see and talk to her -

Until she finally could, but only from a distance when Lena finally entered the tent. She’d paused briefly when she’d seen who was at the DJ booth - none other than the beautiful, tattooed Kate - Kara’s former hookup. Lena had frozen at the sight, completely unsure how to react. Lucy had asked what’s wrong. She’d lied and said nothing. But she could _not_ believe the odds.

She was distracted by Kate’s presence the entire time, mostly because she was unable to be with Kara in this moment. To hold her close protectively and let Kate see that Kara was with her now. It was a petty thought. But Lena couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy and protectiveness.

Lena went through the obligatory motions of sitting at the main table and toasting the bride and watching Sam and Jack have their first dance. And her toast had been simple, but sweet, expressing her gratitude for having a friend like her and knowing she’d be happy because she was the best judge of character she’d ever known, and if she chose Jack, then they would indeed last forever.

Such a speech had only further caused Kara’s heart to strain. And it didn’t help that Kara felt Kate’s stare on her practically every second since she’d walked in and they’d locked eyes in surprise to see each other. She also couldn’t believe the odds of her current lover’s best friend’s wedding being DJ’d by her previous lover, but hey - it was a small island. And Kate was the best at what she did. And she knew it, in more ways than one, which is why Kara knew it bugged Kate that she didn’t want to be with her after their first hookup. Kate had a bit of a reputation like Kara did, and sure, she knew her way around a woman’s body with more skill than most. But Kara had felt nothing for her. The hookup was like so many of her others - merely the result of boredom and cheap alcohol. Kate was a great way to get off with gusto. Nothing more. After they’d hooked up, Kate had mentioned to Kara how she thought Kara’s reputation was overblown, but she’d been proven wrong so she wanted to see her again. Which Kara had declined. But she’d kept trying and trying to get with Kara again and again, mistakenly thinking they were doing some cat and mouse game, when really Kara just had no further interest.

Especially now. Especially as she had found herself waiting for Lena. Wondering when she’d show up to the tent. But also dreading seeing her. It was a strange, frustrating feeling. She craved Lena like one craves an unhealthy snack, knowing you shouldn’t - but unable to resist once it was right in front of you.

And finally Lena had showed up and Kara watched her go through all those motions at the main table and listened to her give that speech. And there was a confidence to her she’d never seen. And she couldn’t help but swell with pride, and then become awash with struggle and pain once again. Because Kara had become something Lena needed. And Lena had become something Kara wanted. And that was a problem. Because like she told Alex - nothing lasts. Just ask her parents. Or John’s wife. Or others... So before she could fall in love and risk that kind of pain, risk a loss she knew she could never survive - she would end it. She would end it today. She would end it before the wedding is over. So she told herself again and again. And again.

Eventually, as the procedural obligations had settled and bouquets and garters had been thrown, it was now just about everyone having fun -

So Lena could finally slip away from her duties as maid of honor.

She approaches Kara, sitting at a table alone, as everyone else was up dancing, mingling or getting drinks.

She can’t help but notice the four and a half empty champagne glasses in front of Kara. But she figures a stranger's wedding probably isn’t the most comfortable place for Kara to be, especially after she’d been recognized by a couple teenagers and had spent a good half hour posing for smiling photos and recording silly boomerangs for guest after guest who caught on that there was a celebrity athlete amongst them and asked for the same. Kara was kind and sweet and obliged with a happy grin of course, never showing any sign of annoyance or tire, but Lena was sure it had been a little draining.

“Hey.” Lena says softly.

And Kara looks up at her with slightly hazy eyes.

And all of Kara's resolve is threatened once again.

“Hey.” Kara replies gently, that familiar word spoken in that low, almost raspy tone that makes Lena melt.

“You look beautiful.” Kara says barely as she stares up at her, and Lena swears she sees the hint of tears in Kara’s eyes, but it could just be the combo of lighting and alcohol.

Lena blushes a bit and grins. “So do you.” she says almost painfully seductively and Kara shifts in her seat a little. And the role reversal isn’t lost on Kara as she downs that fifth glass.

Lena glances back without fully looking.

“Is this awkward?” she has to ask, regarding Kate's presence.

“Doesn’t have to be.” Kara says with a slight shake of her head. “Least there’s nobody else here I’ve slept with. Oh, yeah - 'cept that guy.” she says gesturing her empty glass past Lena.

Lena’s head whiplashes and face falls flat.

Kara holds back a sad smile, “Kidding.” she assures a hand gently brushing the side of Lena’s leg.

And Lena softens and shakes her head with a chuckle, “You’re cruel.”

And the statement make’s Kara’s mildly humored mood drop away, in its place a set jaw and haunted weight.

But Lena doesn’t notice, instead glancing around briefly as she finds Sam and Jack swaying again as a new romantic track begins, a singer's slight hum echoing in the room.

“Dance with me.” Lena says suddenly, extending a hand.

There’s a soft light that appears around Lena as she hovers over Kara, courtesy of the string of lights overhead. She literally looks like an angel. A soft, green eyed, raven haired angel -

And Kara’s hand finally moves as if on its own, grasping Lena’s as she rises.

And Lena leads her to the dance floor. And unlike at Ano’s food truck, this time they’re surrounded by people. And Lena doesn’t care one bit as they embrace and begin to slowly sway to Jessie Ware’s “Say You Love Me.”

Sam catches a glance at them and smiles. Between the champagne color of Lena’s soft jumpsuit and the light gray and silver of Kara’s suit - they look like a blended sparkle under the lights, soft and beautiful and perfect.

Kara wants to look away but she can’t help but be locked in by those intoxicating emeralds.

“It means a lot that you’re here.” Lena finally says.

Kara offers a slight smile of acknowledgement.

“I missed you.” Lena then admits.

Kara’s lips part to respond, as if she wants to say it back. Instead - she leans in and kisses Lena, slight and brief, but meaningful.

And where Lena would’ve previously pulled back or run away or wanted to burrow into the ground being kissed by a woman in a room full of people she knows - she lets it happen and just keeps swaying with the beat as their lips part.

Then Kara seems to struggle and she swallows hard, “Lena…”

“I know.” Lena interrupts above a whisper.

Kara’s brow furrows.

“I know, this is a lot. I know it’s fast. But - Kara, I feel…so...” she tries to find the right words as she searches Kara’s deep blue eyes. But then Kara breaks eye contact and shuts her lids and shakes her head, hand tightening around Lena’s. And she stays that way a moment.

“Hey. Hey -“ Lena says, hand coming to Kara’s face, forcing her to look up again and resume eye contact, "Where’d you go just now? Stay with me.” she says gently as if _she’s_ now the strong one. As if _she’s_ now the guide.

“I’m right here.” she assures Kara, thumb stroking her cheek, as if she desperately needs it. Because this dark, unsure mood is unlike Kara and she doesn’t know what’s happening or why, but she wants to help.

She has no idea it only causes Kara more pain.

So Kara simply pulls her closer and shuts her eyes again. _Because maybe if she just holds onto her… it will hurt less than looking her in the eyes._

And thus their bodies remain pressed together intimately, fingers intertwined and faces next to each other as they sink into the moment and exist as if they were the only two people in the world.

And Lena’s concerned, but she lets it be and just holds onto Kara as Kara holds onto her.

Until the song starts to ramp up a bit, approaching it’s climactic verse -

_“Slowly, slowly you run for me,_

_But do you know me at all_

_Some one told me love controls everything_

_But only if you know”_ -

Kara’s breathing picks up, matching its desperate build, becoming overwhelmed as the lyric _“Cause I don't wanna fall in love, if you don't want to try”_-

Has her releasing Lena, escaping her gasp and rushing for the exit.

“Kara?” Lena says in surprise and confusion.

“Kara?” she calls after her, but Kara has already cut through the crowds and slipped on out.

Lena hesitates a moment, not understanding what just happened.

She finally moves to follow.

But before she can reach the exit -

“Lena!” Nia’s voice startles her from the pursuit.

“Aunt Amelia have you met Lena?” Nia says, dragging Jack's mother over.

“Of course, she’s my daughter in law’s best friend. We just had dinner together last night.” the woman says with a tone as if Nia is the biggest idiot in the world.

And Nia is giving Lena a ‘help me’ look and for a moment, Lena’s too distracted by staring after where Kara left. But then she sees Nia’s desperation and remembers the promise she made.

And before she can decide to follow Sam’s advice about making small talk or asking about the woman's trip to Greece -

“I swear-“ Amelia says, addressing Lena as if Nia isn’t standing right there “It’s like my nephew lost his brain when lost his… you know.” she finishes, waving her hand dismissively in disgust as she’s about to sip her full glass of champagne.

And Lena’s face drops and brow furrows heavily in offense on Nia’s behalf, even though Nia looks more hurt than shocked. As if this sort of talk is completely normal from her aunt, and she’s used to it. And suddenly something goes flat and cold in Lena’s gaze.

“Yes - I am your daughter in law’s best friend. Her thoroughly gay, card carrying lesbian, newly rainbow flag waving best friend.”

The woman freezes, unable to swallow that sip as Lena continues -

“And I always will be, and that will never change, nor will your niece being trans and wonderful and kind and funny. We’re human beings,Amelia, just like you. We eat. We drink. We take shits. We laugh. We love. We cry and we hurt. And maybe you think it makes you feel superior to hurt us, but really it just makes you very, very small. So if you can’t speak to Nia in a way that respects her gender or any other queer, trans or even questioning individual's, then perhaps you shouldn’t speak at all.”

And with that, Lena snatches Amelia's drink from her fingers, downs it in one gulp and shoves the empty glass back to her chest as the woman is left in utter shock, looking like she’s just been slapped. And Nia’s mouth is agape - in complete awe, before Lucy, having seen the whole exchange and been equally impressed, grabs Nia by the hand and pulls her into a group dance with a smirk as they all laugh and proceed to have the time of their lives.

——-

Kate catches up to Kara before Lena can find her, trapping her by a tall set of bushes outside.

“Hey, you wanna get out of here? I got ‘em on a playlist.” she says confidently of ditching the gig, a twinge of Aussie accent to her voice, sensing Kara’s anxious, troubled mood and wanting to help - mostly for selfish reasons.

“I mean I know you’re here with one of the guests, but - come on, a tourist, really?” Kate practically laughs at the very idea of it.

This statement obviously bothers Kara, in more ways than one.

She just frowns at Kate, hands on her hips as she paces, obviously still needing air.

Kate frowns at the state of Kara, never seeing her like this before.

“Oh shit, you didn’t. Damn, you _did_.” Kate chuckles, accusing Kara, but she’s almost not humored at all. She almost feels sorry for her. _Falling for a tourist…_

“Hey -“ Kate now grabs Kara’s hand to calm her, and she pulls her in close. Too close. Intimately close, their bodies suddenly pressed against each other as Kate’s back hits a huge decorative vase behind her, her other tugging slightly at Kara’s belt, their faces suddenly inches apart.

“I can make you forget all about her.” Kate tries as one hand starts to slip down into Kara's pants, only an inch or two at first.

And yes, Kate has piercing green eyes and full lips and a slight foreign accent. And yes she could make Kara come almost as quickly and hard as Kara is used to doing for others. _Almost_.

But she’s not her.

Kara’s hand comes up next to Kate’s head to rest on the glazed terracotta and Kate thinks she’s won, so Kate goes ahead and fully dips her hand into the front of Kara's pants -

Until Kara just uses the vase to push off of it and step back, out of Kate’s grasp.

“No. No, this isn’t - I don’t want this. I don’t want you, Kate.” she says finally in a sigh of annoyance, pushing Kate’s hands off of her body.

And that’s when Lena comes around the corner - just in time to witness Kara’s rejection of Kate. And Lena is torn somewhere between shocked disgust at Kate’s attempt and intense comfort at Kara’s quick rejection.

And then Kate turns and spots Lena and she rolls her eyes and mutters something about having to get back as she brushes past her.

And then Kara turns and locks eyes with Lena. And Kara looks angry. Lena thinks it’s anger at Kate, but then she thinks maybe it's not when Kara stomps over to her and Lena finds herself involuntarily locking up - unsure what Kara’s about to say or do because now she looks _furious_. And Lena frowns, searching Kara’s eyes, trying to understand -

Then Kara snatches her hand and pulls her forward and Lena follows, without questioning.

——-

They wind up back at Kara’s place.At Kara’s place where Kara’s had so many other lovers. Where it’s less personal for Kara. Where she didn't confess her deepesest darkest traumas. Where it’s easier -

To fuck Lena with raging, self-hating abandon.

Lena had previously wondered what it would be like for Kara’s hips to move in beat with that Tahitian style drumming from the luau and now she was finding out. She’s literally pounding into her like a piston. It’s all physical. Mechanical. Harsh. Almost violent. Not enough to actually hurt Lena, because they both know she never would - but it’s intense, almost too intense. And there’s something in Kara’s face that’s dark. And there’s a disconnect. A distance. A coldness. Kara doesn’t even make eye contact, which has never happened when they’ve been together. So all Lena can look at is Kara’s furiously focused expression and the silver necklace at her bare neck which swings back and forth over Lena's chest, a blue gemstone that would normally match Kara’s blue eyes, but not now - now they’re practically black.

As Kara plows into her hard with the strap - Lena can’t help but note how the quiet bungalow is filled with those absurd, obscene sounds she’d usually hear in a porno. All slapping skin and grunts and moans - and then an ascending crescendo of ever building gasps from from the back of her own throat that seem to be getting embarrassingly high.

Kara’s pace is absurd. And Lena’s already come three times but each time, before she could even enjoy it or ride it out, she was being forced into more build up from the continued, animalistic pounding.

Her body bounces and her head bangs the wood above again and again until she puts a hand up to try to hold herself from striking it further, but pushing back against Kara is like pushing back against someone with superpowers. So the pounding continues and Lena's increasing gasping, desperate whine keeps getting higher and higher - until Kara suddenly pulls out fully in one of the thrusts and in a flash she rips the strap off herself and throws it to the ground without care, grabbing Lena’s leg and spreading her wider as she lifts it up and drapes it over her shoulder, quickly shifting her own body so their cores meet instantly, raw and direct -

And if Lena ever wondered what it would be like to engage in a full blown scissoring, now she knows and -

_JESUS CHRIST_ \- she’s never felt physically closer to Kara as she grinds and rubs their cores together so hard she knows she’ll be bruised in the morning - but she doesn’t care, and before long Lena is literally begging to reach that peak again, unconsciously gurgling and crying out “_Kara, Kara, oh fuck Kara - please!_”

She’s so loud she’s sure it can be heard across all six acres of Kara’s land and she knows she sounds like those annoying women she hates in those pornos because it’s usually so fake, but this time it’s very _very_ real. And then her whining of “_Kara Kara Kara_” becomes “_Kar-kar-_“ as her hands grip and twist against the headboard above her again just to have something to hold onto as her body desperately writhes of its own accord and Kara continues to grind their slick cores against each other hard and fast in the exact perfect way that reduces Lena to instead now let out a choking “_K-k-_“ until finally her body lurches and muscles go rigid in a silent scream as if possessed by the devil himself, as she reaches the peak of - _FUUUUCK!!_

Lena lets out a profane sound she couldn’t describe if she wanted to, but it’s something inhuman and garbled and desperate, practically a whining scream. Because thanks to the the sheer eroticism and fury - she just came harder than she ever has before, and no penetration had even been required at the end. And Kara’s joining her almost immediately because Lena’s body’s produces an almost shocking amount carnal reaction to it all, exceeding anything she’d ever experienced before with Kara. So as Kara grunts and momentarily freezes to arrive at that peak right along with her in a blinding fury and both their walls clench and contract in the moment - she’s riding the passing wave. And it’s all slickness from there, as the bed is officially soaked in a combination of sweat and Lena, as she finally breaks and gasps, mouth still agape and eyes still squeezed shut, body absolutely trembling from the immediate aftermath, her inner walls still gripping and releasing nothing as her hands grip and release the headboard and sheets. And she shakes almost violently once more as she finally, fully settles down. And breathes. And yeah....

_It’s no wonder she couldn’t get off without Kara._

But then Kara’s literally falling off and landing beside her, panting almost as hard as Lena is. But she’s not touching her. In fact there’s a profuse lack of 'warm blanket Kara' on or near her. That uncomfortable distance from before is fully aware and glaring again as they each try to compose themselves, especially Lena who has to force herself to blink and breathe and swallow normally after having just been quite literally fucked into oblivion.

“Jesus Christ…" she mutters breathlessly. “Kara, that was…” she can’t even find the words. But shifting her body -

“We made quite the mess didn’t we.” Lena grins, then “I - I need water.” she manages breathlessly, finally forming actual brain function and realizing her throat is horse and bone dry.

Lena somehow pushes up onto wobbly, slightly numb legs in order to go grab a glass of water. She stands there fully nude in Kara’s kitchen, still breathing hard as she downs half a glass of water in desperate gulps. And as she drinks with her back turned -

She never sees Kara’s face contort in agonizing heartbreak, tears welling and a desperate sob choking out silently.

And when Lena wipes the drips of water off her chin and sets the glass down turns back to look at her a few moments later -

Kara’s already wiped the wetness from her eyes and is now composed and firm, jaw set like nothing at all is wrong.

Except when Lena exhaustedly falls back into bed next to her - Kara doesn’t look at her. Lena thinks nothing major of it at first, after all Kara’s just staring at the ceiling fan going round and round, still catching her own breath, until the last hours replay in Lena’s head and she’s reminded of Kara’s mood at the wedding and the lack of emotion and uncharacteristic coldness and disconnect she felt from Kara as she’d fucked her.

Lena swallows nervously and decides to try to reconnect, because after all, Kara’s only human and maybe she’s just... having a bad day. Maybe it’s Ruby. Maybe it’s her family. Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s not her absolute worst fucking nightmare and Kara’s regretting everything or worse yet Lena’s just been used and she really was just another notch on the bedpost. But no - Kara Danvers was good and pure and kind and protective and she’d never have opened up like that if it was all some sick ruse. Because she could have anybody, including the stunning, forward Kate, but she chose her. Again and again she chose Lena all week, so she knows this is real. She knows Kara feels things for her, deep things. She just has no idea where it’s all gone all of the sudden. But maybe she’s just scared that Lena’s leaving? Maybe that’s it.

So to help, she rolls over and tilts on an elbow and tries -

“I was thinking we could go to that spot tomorrow that you told me about. That big cliff, with the view?” she says, still panting slightly.

Kara frowns. Still doesn’t look over.

“You’re leaving tomorrow.” she says flatly, composed and breathing somehow returned to normal before Lena’s has.

“Oh, yeah about that I, em… I’m staying til Wednesday, actually.” And Lena wants to say why. Wants to tell her she wants to talk to her about staying_ forever_. About leaving her whole life behind for Kara. Instead -

“I’d love to get some shots there.” she bluffs, figuring it’s not really a lie because she really _does_ want to take photos. But also it buys her time to find the right way to lay it all out there.

Unbeknownst to Lena, who’s looking down and fiddling with the sheet as she awaits Kara’s reaction -

Kara’s frown deepens as she digests this new information. She honestly can’t believe Lena’s making this worse by staying longer. And just before Kara can speak, before she can start to shake her head and sit up and end it all right then and there and leave Lena shaking and trembling in another, far less pleasurable way -

Kara’s phone buzzes on the floor.

Her teeth grind and she rolls further away from Lena to snatch it up.

_Shit_.

“It’s Ruby.”

Kara quickly pushes out of bed.

“Is everything okay?” Lena asks in concern.

“No, she -“ she almost snaps at Lena but forces herself to soften, “She was training and wiped out. She’s at the hospital. She broke her wrist. Damn it.” Kara sighs as she pulls on whatever closest articles of clothing she can find - in this case a pair of gray sweats and her silk silver blouse which she yanks on harshly and buttons only twice in the middle. It’s an odd combo of slouch and sleek and Lena can’t help but notice how Kara can always look beautiful no matter her style or mood.

“Hey.” Lena says, crawling to Kara’s side of the bed and grabbing her wrist, forcing Kara to slow down. “She’s going to be alright. It’s just a wrist.”

“She won’t be able to compete. It - it was all for nothing.” Kara says, pulling back a bit away from her grasp. And those last words ring hauntingly true for Kara in more ways than one. 

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“No - no, you should just go back to your hotel. I’ll um - I’ll call you tomorrow, we can do that cliff thing.” she says so dismissively that Lena’s left frowning. But before she can question further -

Kara’s already out the door.

Lena’s left sitting there alone in total silence now, her body both achingly sore and satiated more than ever, clothes strewn everywhere, a harnessed phallus on the floor, bedsheets soaked, and despite it all - the distinctive lack of Kara’s presence in the room, which isn’t much different from when she was there, if she’s being honest. Kara’s gone now, but she can’t help but feel like she was gone before. And something about that scares the hell out of her.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buckle up.

Kara rushes down the hall of the small hospital ER. Her heart is pounding. She’s done this far too many times. _So_ many times, it's now to the point where she fucking _hates_ hospitals.

She rounds the corner and finally spots Ruby’s grandmother, Patricia, a kindly old woman with white hair and dark rimmed glasses.

“Pat - hey, I came as quick as I could. How is she?”

“She’s alright, Kara, thank you-” then Pat spots the odd combo of Kara’s fancy blouse, sweats and flip flops. “You didn’t have to rush over.”

“Of course I did, c’mon.”

Kara suddenly calms when she spots Ruby sitting up on the bed in the closest room, talking to a nurse and looking generally okay aside from some minor scrapes and a cast at her wrist.

“What happened?”

Pat shakes her head and takes a deep breath.

“I… wouldn’t begin to understand what went wrong technically, I’m not - surf literate like the two of you.”

Kara offers a slight smile as she listens intently.

“But if you ask me - she’s tired, Kara. She’s been training too much. Too hard.”

Kara frowns curiously.

“We only train a few hours every couple days.”

“That’s - what she’s doing with you. She’s been training on her own. All day. Every day.”

Kara’s shoulders drop and hands come to her hips.

“Oh, damn it. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

“Of course you didn’t, Kara. You’re not her coach, you’re her mentor. You help her so much and you do it out of the goodness of your heart and we couldn’t be more grateful. But when she’s not with you, she’s with her coach. And when she’s not with him, she’s training herself. It wasn’t affecting her grades, so I didn’t say anything. This - this is all my fault.”

“Hey, Pat. Listen to me. You’re doing a great job. Okay? I know it can’t be easy for you guys. Being on your own. But you’re doing great. Ruby - she’s an _amazing_ girl. And she’s going to do _amazing_ things. And yeah, it’s because she’s talented. But it’s also because of you.” Kara nods as she finishes, assuring her.

The woman wipes tears, comforted by Kara’s confidence and kindness, “_Thank you_.”

Then Pat glances past her.

“I know it’s a lot to ask, but could y-“

“I’ll talk to her.” Kara says before having to even be asked. “Why don’t you go get something to eat. You must be starving. I know how long this crap takes.”

The woman chuckles lightly and nods, because yes - it’s tiring and yes she’s hungry.

“Thank you.” She says again softly, rubbing Kara’s arm.

“Oh sweetie, you missed a button.” she then catches and quickly fixes for Kara, who smiles gratefully as the older woman dotes on her before heading down the hall.

A moment later Kara's in Ruby’s room alone after the nurse has stepped out.

Ruby sinks a little in shame at the sight of her.

“So I hear you’ve been training twelve hours a day.”

Ruby droops even more.

“Ruby I didn’t train twelve hours a day til I was nineteen and on the circuit. And even then that was only a couple days a week.”

Kara steps closer and sighs.

“You gotta pace yourself, kid."

“But I’m not good enough. I’m not where I should be.” Ruby argues, frustrated.

“Says who?”

“Says everybody. My coach. My competition. _So many girls_ are better than me. I’m not - I’m not like you, I’m not naturally gifted at this. I have to work twice as hard.”

“Okay. Let’s say that’s true, which I don’t think it is. And I would know. But if you feel that way let’s address that. Why didn’t you just talk to me? Tell me about all this?”

“It was embarrassing! You’re - you’re so cool, Kara. You’re like the coolest person I’ve ever known.” Ruby blushes a little and avoids eye contact at the statement. “I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

“Rubes…” Kara says with a sigh as she sits on a nearby stool and rolls over so she’s right in front of Ruby.

“Look at me.”

Ruby forces herself to make nervous eye contact.

“You know I wouldn’t lie to you, right?”

Ruby nods.

“Okay. Then you know I’m telling the truth when I say that you could never disappoint me. And that you _are_ naturally talented. And I would not be here, on a Sunday afternoon, in a - three hundred dollar silk blouse and cheap ass sweats if you weren’t somebody I believed in.”

Ruby can’t help but grin and laugh.

“You do look weird.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t _always_ have my shit together.” she smiles but it fades a little at the deeper reality of the statement.

She then gently takes Ruby’s injured hand.

“Just promise me in the future, you’ll talk to me. Okay? Whatever’s going on, good or bad. Because when it’s bad and you shut down- “ Kara hesitates as she realizes the irony she’s about to say as she looks at the cast, “It only causes more pain.”

Ruby takes this in with a nod.

Then she leans forward to hug Kara, who responds with a tight squeeze as she stares sadly over Ruby’s shoulder.

——-

“Are you sure it’s not a problem?” Lena leans in to ask Sam closely as Jack piles backpacks into their rented SUV.

“You kidding? This place sounds amazing, I can’t wait to see it.”

“I know, it’s just - it’s your honeymoon. Shouldn’t you be locked up in your suite?”

“Lena.” Sam laughs, “We’ve been together six years. We’re way beyond holing up in our suite for days on end. Last night was more than enough for this particular twelve to twenty four hours.”

“It’s true.” Jack hilariously chimes in, overhearing. “I can’t get enough of her. In appropriate, well-rested doses.”

Lena chuckles. “Got it.”

“Yeah, so we’re more than happy to be your buffer. But are you sure you need it? I mean didn’t you slip out of my wedding yesterday to go bang one out.”

“That’s not - yes.”

Sam grins.

“But something’s off. I don’t know what it is.”

“Obviously not your sex life.” Jack chimes in again. “I swear it’s like this woman’s got more drive that I did. In college. On knock off viagra.”

“Why were you taking knock off viagra?” Sam laughs at her husband.

“We were bored. Wanted to see what would happen. That’s our philosophy as men, you know that. We build fire. And we do stupid shit because we’re bored and want to see what’ll happen.”

Sam shakes her head and shoves him playfully as he gives her a peck.

Lena watches them fondly.

“I’m telling her today, that I’d like to stay. That I… that I struggle to envision a future without her in it.

“Damn, Lena.” Sam sighs with affection.

“Damn indeed.” Jack says, “I should’ve put that in my vows.”

“Okay.” Lena laughs and now she shoves him.

“Let’s goooo.” Sam then sing-songs as they all pile in.

The ride across the island is long. Longer than the ride from the airport to the hotel that first day. Mostly because of Lena's nerves. She’d only heard from Kara once last night after she’d texted to ask how Ruby was. Kara had responded a simple, “_She’ll be ok. Thanks for asking. See you tomorrow._” followed by the shaka emoji. And ever since, as always, Lena was counting the hours til she saw her again. Only this time, she was hoping things would be okay between them. Hoping today would make it that way.

When they pull up to the base of the mountain, Lena’s stomach jumps at the sight of Kara’s jeep. And Kara. Waiting against it, leaning casually in that chill, sexy way she does so effortlessly. 

“Damn, is she cool doing everything?” Jack laughs as they roll to a stop.

Lena gives him a ‘don’t’ glare.

And then she climbs out and comes around their SUV.

Lena's a bit nervous, breath held - until Kara smiles at her and gazes with a look that she knows and loves so much. It’s the way, aside from yesterday, that Kara’s always looked at her. As if she was the only person in the world. As if she wants to kiss her and ravage her and hold her and love her all at once.

But as she gets closer, she sees something behind those eyes - a sadness. And she hopes she has the cure.

“Hey.” Kara says first, pushing off her jeep.

“Hey yourself.” Lena replies, a little more flirtatiously than intended.

Kara licks her lips and glances down with a smile as if she knows what Lena’s thinking. And then it softens and she glances at Sam and Jack.

“Hey.” she says to them in a completely different tone.

Lena loves how Kara’s simple “hey”s can have such varied intentions and meanings depending on who she’s talking to.

“Woulda thought you two would be holed up in the honeymoon sweet.” Kara jokes.

Lena grins as Sam and Jack exchange a look.

“You _are_ perfect for each other.” Sam laughs.

Kara’s smile drops again and she clears her throat, “We should uh, get going. It gets busy in the afternoons - _Instagrammers_." she only half jests.

“Shit, so you’ll judge me if I take a boomerang?” Jack asks.

That gets him a shove forward by Sam. “_I’ll_ judge you.” she says.

“So will I.” Lena chimes in from behind.

As they turn to walk on, Kara reaches down and picks up Lena’s backpack which she’d left at her feet and hands it to her, ever the gentlewoman.

And a warmth runs through Lena as their fingers trace. Because this is the Kara she’s known the whole time. And she’s glad to have her back. So she steps up and kisses her. And Kara sinks into it. And her shoulders drop. And again, Lena detects a deep sadness.

“Listen, I’m sorry for yesterday.” Kara says low, “For being so distant. For how I behaved. I know things got - intense.”

“You didn’t hurt me, Kara. If that’s what you’re worried about. Am I sore? Yes. Did I enjoy myself? _Very_ much. I always do with you. And I know you would never hurt me.”

“No, I would never hurt you like that.”

The ‘like that’ gives Lena slight pause -

“Hey, you coming?” Sam suddenly hollers over shoulder, distracting Lena from questioning Kara.

“I hear you do that a lot lately!” Jack follows up, salaciously.

Sam stifles a laugh and so does Lena as she awkwardly scratches at her hair.

“This is how he’ll be the whole way.” Lena warns with an apologetic laugh.

Kara nods, turning to look ahead -

“Why, you need tips?” she shoots back at Jack.

Lena’s mouth drops and Sam’s matches and Jack just bursts out laughing with a clap, “I like her!”

And together, all smiles, the group makes their way up the trail. 

And she takes Kara’s hand, which unbeknownst to Lena, gives Kara pause - but she goes with it. Cherishes it. For now.

——-

Kara only pulls away once they’ve reached the top of the cliffs, as everyone is blown away by the breathtaking sight. They stand high above a deep cavern and ice blue lagoon. On one side of the horizon they can see half the island, and on the other - the ocean, stretching as far as the eye can see. It really is an incredible place.

“Wow. People jump this?” Jack asks, peering down carefully over the edge.

“Crazy people.” Kara answers with a shrug.

He squints down to the eighty feet below. Then looks at her again.

“You’ve jump it, haven’t you?”

Kara stifles a smile.

“In high school.”

Lena and Sam are shocked.

“I KNEW IT!” Jack bellows. “Could you jump it now?”

“Not with this bum lung.” she smirks as she takes a needed swig of water before offering it to Lena.

“Ah, damn. Still, I want to be you when I grow up.” Jack jokes.

“Hey, maybe when your balls drop you will be.”

Sam dies laughing, Lena almost chokes on the water, and Jack turns beet red.

“Okay, I like you less now.” He says flatly with a humorous squint.

And Lena just grins, loving the sight of Kara and her best friends getting along so well. It warms her heart. Just further confirms her plan. Her plan to talk to Kara now that they’re at the top of the cliff, in this incredible place with this incredible view.

But first -

Lena pulls out her camera and takes a series of photos. Of the view. Of Sam and Jack. And of Kara, as she stares out with that heaviness of her brow and setting of her jaw that Lena loves so much, as if she’s got the weight of the world on her broad shoulders. And then Kara turns and gazes over at her and Lena sees her eyes through the camera, and the look in them makes her lower it.

Kara nods to draw her over, and Lena doesn’t hesitate to oblige as she puts the camera back in her bag.

And then Kara takes her hand - “Come here.” she says gently.

Kara leads Lena to a spot away from the others, back near the edge of the cliff overlooking the lagoon below, where they can sit on pair of medium boulders that allow them to face each other.

And then she takes a deep breath, trying to calm the pressure in her lungs from the altitude.

“I um, I wanted to talk to you…” Kara begins.

And Lena exhales now too, “I’ve wanted to talk to _you_.” she says, holding back a smile.

But then Kara looks down and her teeth grind and eyes shut, and Lena’s mood shifts. She’s gone from excited to scared in half a second flat.

“Kara what it is?” Lena asks, tentatively.

And then Kara’s eyes open and that deep blue is glazed with moisture.

“I need you to know, that what I feel for you, is very real.”

Lena almost wants to smile, as it’s the first time Kara’s really spoken openly of her affection like this. But the way she says it, and the look in her eyes prevents Lena from feeling at all good about it.

“And that it’s not you.”

Lena’s face falls. Because everyone knows '_It's not you, it's me.' _And she suddenly prays to a God she's never even been sure existed that that's not what this is -

“It’s all me." Kara finishes, confirming Lena's worst fear. And Lena’s lips part and tears start to well in _her_ eyes now, as she realizes what this is. And she’s confused. She’s _shocked_.

"It’s all my fault for letting things get this far. For making you think that-“

“That what?" Lena blurts, "That you had feelings for me? You just said-“

“_That there could be a future_.” Kara clarifies, firmly, “I never should have lead you on like this.”

“Lead me on?” Lena’s eyebrow shoots up and she scoffs, almost laughing if it was at all funny, which it's not. It's the furthest thing from funny.

“Kara, I don’t understand-” 

“I should’ve just stayed away. It wasn’t fair to you.”

Lena’s floored now. Her heart is breaking in front of Kara and Kara looks like she wants to jump right off the cliff from the guilt of causing that look to appear on Lena’s beautiful face.

“But I can’t be with someone who’s just going to leave. I’m sorry.”

Lena pushes up.

“I was going to stay.” she tries.

Kara frowns.

“I was going to stay, Kara! That’s what I wanted to talk to you about today!”

This just breaks Kara’s heart. She was wondering where Lena’s head was at and now she knows, but it doesn’t matter. It only makes this even harder. Kara shakes her head.

“It’s not about you leaving for another state.”

“That doesn’t make any sense. You just said-“

“I said can’t give myself to someone who will leave.”

“And I just said I wasn’t going to!”

“I’m not talking about moving, Lena!” Kara shoves up now, with a bit more fury than expected, “I lose people!"

Lena frowns as Kara continues, desperate and angry - 

"People die around me! My parents. John.”

Lena shoulders drop as she realizes what Kara's saying. And Sam and Jack can't help but overhear the sudden loud, pained voices and tones. They try not to watch directly, but know something is very, very wrong. 

“Jesus, even poor Ruby almost paid the price and she’s just someone I mentor!”

“Ruby’s fine, Kara she just broke her wrist-” Lena tries, shaking her head.

“My best friend, in middle school. Sara Lance. The first girl I ever kissed. She got _cancer_, Lena. Hodgkins Lymphoma. Diagnosed too late, she died six months later.”

A deep furrow begins to form on Lena’s brow as Kara continues -

“The first guy I ever fell for - in high school, Mike? He OD’d a year after we graduated.”

“And then there was Lois.” Kara’s voice cracks, “She was dating my cousin Clark, and she fell for me. We never cheated, I would never do that. But there was something between us, something we couldn’t deny, so she broke up with him to be with me. She was in the Navy and we tried to make it work long distance - and then her ship was struck by a bomb in Oman.”

Lena exhales a shocked breath.

And more tears well as Kara grits, “I never even got to say goodbye. And Clark never forgave me for taking her away. Not for her falling in love with me, but for taking. Her. Away. Away from this world. ‘Cause see, that’s - that's what I do, Lena. I love people… and they leave. They _always_ leave." she licks her lips, trying to remain as composed as she can, despite it all, "I don't even know how Alex has escaped it all this time, but even with her - I am always waiting… always wondering when I’ll lose her too, and then be truly alone.”

A lone tear finally falls at this.

“I lead a good life, I help people, I do good things - but I’m _cursed_, Lena. It all started with my parents on that road. I wasn’t meant to survive. Not the crash, not the wipe out last year. I keep dodging fate, so fate keeps taking people from me to balance the scales. And the idea, of you... of losing you —I can’t. That’s one... that’s _the one_ _I can’t take_.” Kara practically trembles as she finishes with a heartbreaking finality -

“I never should have approached you at that party. I never should have taken you to Ano’s. Danced with you. Said those things." she sniffs, forcing air, "I guess a part of me thought - if I could just keep it casual. Just keep my heart closed off from you. Then maybe I could keep you. But then I just got caught up in your eyes and your smile and the way you come apart in my arms, and before long I was opening up to you and you were opening up to the world... But it was foolish of me. And it wasn’t fair to you, and I am _so_ sorry for pulling you in. I am so sorry for _everything_.”

Kara lets free tears roll now, despite herself. Despite her firm brow.

“Just get back on that plane, Lena. And get as far away from me as you can. Go back to LA, or wherever makes you happy... because you’ll find somebody, somebody who will worship the ground you walk on, who can give you everything you deserve-"

“I already have.” Lena interjects, barely and breathless.

But Kara can’t even begin to address that because she knows she’s right. She would spend every day of the rest of her life worshiping and loving Lena - if she could. So she just continues -

“You’re good, Lena. You are so good. And so kind. And you are _the most_ beautiful woman that I have _ever_ seen.”

“I don’t want anyone else.” Lena interrupts again, more forcefully.

“Neither do I. And I never will.” She shakes her head, stepping closer, “I crave you, Lena. I feel you, in my soul, like I’ve known you my whole life, or in another life maybe…. you’re a part of me now, and you always will be. Please know that. And please know there wasn’t anything you did, or could’ve done.”

Now Lena shakes her head and closes her eyes as if she can just shut this all out to stop it, but Kara continues -

“Please know you were more than enough. And you were the only one I’ve ever _truly_-” Kara’s heart breaks. She can’t even bring herself to say it, “I just can’t let anything happen to you. I can't take it. I can't lose you like that. Not _you_.”

Lena still wants to protest -

“_I can’t_.” Kara says now, breathless and tearful, practically pleading, _begging_ Lena to understand. To spare her. To spare them both.

“_Please_. Lena Kieran Luthor. Just_. Go_.” she says with a weakness in her voice that she’s never heard from Kara before.

Silent, still tears stream down Lena’s cheeks. She can’t form words. She can barely _breathe_. And she certainly can’t protest. _Who could protest that?_ How can she assure this woman who’s lost so much, who’s suffered so much, that she should trust that she won’t lose her? That’s not something Lena can guarantee. She wants more than anything to heal Kara’s heart. To dash her fears. To hold her and swear they’ll be together forever. But Kara’s had so much loss and hurt and trauma. And she knows now that there’s nothing she can say. There’s nothing she can do.

Lena Luthor, who came from privilege and built so much success - has never felt more helpless. And yet still, she’s not angry at Kara. _How could she be? She warned her, didn't she? _That first night. Kara had said she was scared that Lena would be more to her. But Lena was so wrapped up in her own nerves and the newness of it all she wasn’t _really_ listening. So no, she's not angry at Kara. She’s angry at fate. The same fate she’d been furious with after watching that horrible video. And the images replay in her head now as the memory crosses her mind. Of Kara in pain. _Excruciating_ pain. And she can’t bring herself to ask Kara to withstand any more.

So instead of raging or arguing or crying further -

Lena steps closer and takes Kara's face in her hands and kisses her - a tentative, slow, gentle and heartbreaking goodbye, as tears roll down both their faces and they each shatter from the inside out.

And as their lips drag apart and Kara chokes back further emotion and her jaw sets to compose herself, Lena steps back.

But before she can walk away -

“You’re wrong about one thing, Kara Danvers. I’ll never find someone else. No one, that I won’t wish every second, of every day - was you.”

And with that, Lena takes a step.

And then the ground RUMBLES.

“JACK!” Sam screeches in fear when she realizes it’s an Earthquake, as he grabs for her, and Kara’s hand grips the boulder behind her as she reaches for Lena -

Who’s unable to even react before the ground crumbles beneath her.

“LENA!!” Kara gasps and dives, reaching fast -

But she’s too late.

Lena’s sent falling, dropping the endless eighty feet towards the lagoon below, boulders and dirt and vines surrounding her, a small sea of rocky destruction following her down as she SCREAMS, her terror mixing with Sam’s screaming of her name -

THWWWPPPSHHHH -

Lena strikes the water alongside the chunks of Earth that fell with her, somehow piercing the surface feet first on a tilt, sparing her instant death, or so it would seem.

Before waiting to find out -

Kara LEAPS.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What better day to wrap this up than Supercorp Sunday ;) Imagine Blake Neely's "Harnessing Anger" track during the rescue, if you're so inclined. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading and commenting along the way. I hope this story leaves you with feels. And maybe a little inspiration. 
> 
> Mahalo, and a hui hou.

They say time slows when you’re drowning. That a moment feels like an eternity. Maybe that was true. Maybe as Lena struggles and claws at the boulder pinning her thirty feet below the surface at the bottom of the deep lagoon she would have time to think about how long has passed, but instead all she can think about is how one second she was losing the love of her life, and now she was losing oxygen. Now she was losing her _life_.

Her eyes are wide and the vein in her forehead strains as she desperately scratches and pulls and shoves. But the massive rock has her trapped at the knee. She knows it’s not broken, somehow, by miracle. She can still feel and move her toes, but having use of her leg is pointless if she drowns at the bottom of a lagoon.

If she could, Lena would scream and cry as her panic rises and her nails scrape rock, desperately trying to escape, as the depth of pressure and passage of time causes her chest to feel like it might explode -

And then she sees her. Kara’s form appears from the blue depths above, swimming down at her like a rocket, reaching out and grabbing for the boulder the moment she arrives. She grips her fingers underneath and plants her feet at the sandy bottom and tries -

She tries to lift it off of Lena with all her might. The muscles and veins in her face, neck and arms strain to their max as she puts all of her brute strength and fury into the attempt. And Lena tries to help her, but she’s growing weaker and can’t hold her own breath much longer. So she grabs for Kara’s arm and tries to push her away, desperately - 

Kara can’t be down here. It’s too deep. And Lena’s stuck. Kara can’t do this. She can’t die with her. _For_ her. Lena needs Kara to do what she'd just asked her to - and just _go_.

But Lena can’t be one more loss for Kara Danvers. She’s broken things off to prevent just this, so Kara refuses to accept this cruel fate. And she just keeps lifting and pushing and straining. And her face contorts in a grit and then she SCREAMS out under the muted depths of the water as bubbles explode from her mouth and her whole body strains with every last ounce of energy she has, pushing back against everything, fighting back against the fates that dared do this to her again - and ignoring the increasingly CRUSHING pressure in her chest -

Until the boulder finally shifts from the superhuman strength fueled by rage and desperation, and Lena’s eyes go wide as Kara briefly holds at the underneath with one hand while quickly yanking at Lena’s shirt to pull her free and shove her forward and up.

Lena’s survival instinct kicks in - and she swims. Hard. And fast. As fast as she’s ever swam, her lungs burning as the oxygen has long since run out but she refuses to die like this. She claws and kicks and flails to get higher and higher as quickly as she can, almost to the surface -

She never sees Kara’s hand get pinned under the boulder she lifted as it fell back to the floor in a dusty explosion of impact. She doesn’t know she struggles to free herself for another half a minute, until the softened flesh on her fingers tears as she has no choice but to just rip it free, blood instantly flowing in the water around her.

And she never sees Kara suddenly lurch as she hears a pop and feels a booming, excruciating invisible shot to the chest.

Lena only knows something is wrong as she finally gasps for air once she emerges above and turns around to reach for Kara, who should be behind her -

But still hasn’t broken the surface.

“Kara!!?” Lena blurts through choking breaths. “KARA!!” She screams in terror as too many seconds have passed.

But before she can make what would be an utterly futile attempt to dive back down considering she still has no breath -

“I got her!” Jack yells out, diving past her as Sam reaches for Lena from the edge of the drop off close by.

After the Earth had stopped shaking beneath them, they’d spent the last couple minutes carefully rushing down the steep side of the cliff to reach the bottom and try to help.

Jack swims further and deeper -

Until he spots Kara halfway to the bottom. She’d somehow managed to at least push off enough to begin a swim for the surface, until the pain had become unimaginable and her body turned against her and went numb. And everything went dark.

And now she just floats in place, frozen unconscious and unmoving within the depths of the deep blue.

Jack’s eyes go wide and he rushes - harder, faster -

Until he grabs her by the strap of her tank top and pulls, dragging her back up the rest of the way -

He’s left gasping the moment he breaks the surface with Kara’s lifeless body in his arms.

Lena and Sam scramble to the shallow end of the lagoon to be there as Jack drags her out, Sam helping to pull her fully up onto the rocky terrain.

“Kara!” Lena yells desperately, collapsing to the ground next to her, still struggling for her own air and oxygen and unable to imagine how Kara had lasted that long in such a strain and at that depth. It was too deep and too much - and way too long. Far longer than her two minute limit.

It’s obvious that Jack and Sam don’t really know what to do from here as Jack sloppily, tiredly pushes on Kara’s chest and shakes her, trying to wake her up as Sam looks at Lena and sees the sheer horror and tears streaming. But before they can make further futile attempts -

“Watch out! I have medical training!” a feminine voice calls from nowhere, slender hand coming to Jack’s shoulder to move him out of the way.

A woman with caramel skin and long, distinctive features who’d been nearby with friends and saw the whole thing suddenly begins CPR, harshly shoving on Kara’s chest again and again as her friends dial 9-1-1.

“Her lung, she - she has a bad lung!” Sam tells the woman, since Lena can’t even speak, frozen in terror at the sight of Kara’s lifeless body being pumped and shoved on by the woman who can only nod in response as she keeps doing non-stop compressions.

The sight is horrible and sickening. It’s like the video come to life. It’s like Lena’s worst nightmare is playing out right in front of her. And there is nothing she can do but watch, as Kara’s chest is compressed again and again and again -

——-

They say time slows when you’re drowning. That a moment feels like an eternity. Maybe that was true. Maybe as Lena struggles to figure out what’s happened in the last half hour she could process the feeling of drowning in her own sorrow as she stands in the ER.

But she still can’t think, or form words. She can only watch in shock as a British doctor barks orders at his staff and continues to pump and compress Kara’s chest. Someone had kept up the CPR at every step. First the woman at the lagoon, then the EMTs on the helicopter care flight that had blasted across the island and rushed them to the largest hospital downtown. And now this man. This man, with strong arms that now seemed to tire and a strong jaw which now grinds in frustration as he loudly orders “Another epi!” and tries desperately to bring her back.

Kara’s body lurches sickeningly when he shouts clear and they shock her with paddles.

Again. And again.

But nothing changes. Nothing helps.

The sounds all merge together now - the beeping, the accented orders, the panic and the chaos, as Lena watches helplessly, unable to move or speak or pray. She just watches. And she feels so alone all the sudden. The warmth and love that usually emanates around Kara Danvers is noticeably missing. In its place a feeling of coldness. Emptiness. _Death_.

And then suddenly - it all stops. It all goes quiet, minus one single, horrible sound -

The hum of a flatline.

And beyond it she can only hear the panting, exhausted breathing of the man, as someone asks “Doctor Dey?” and he grits and curses. And then he swallows, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his gloved hand, before tearing the latex off and huffing -

“Time of death… two forty t-“

“What are you doing?!” The voice startles Lena from the muted abyss -

And a slim woman with short, reddish brown hair appears next to Lena, eyes wide and chest heaving from having just sprinted down the hall.

“What are you- that’s my sister...” she says breathlessly.

Doctor Dey turns, guilt and sympathy across his face, “Doctor Danvers you shouldn’t be in here-” he starts, sadly.

“That’s my sister!” She booms, shoving past him, “Why are you stopping?!” she demands of the room.

“Doctor Danvers she’s been down too long-“ he reaches for Alex but she harshly yanks her arm away “It’s my sister!” She practically screams in his face.

So he steps back, giving her room for her futile attempts - “Push another epi!” she orders, hand coming to Kara’s chest desperately as the nurse looks to Doctor Dey.

“Push another epi!!” She yells with fury. And the nurse finally obeys, with minimal urgency, everyone believing she’s already gone.

“Move!” Alex orders of another doctor who’s body is blocking her from grabbing the paddles -

“Charge to 360!” she says readying, her own heart racing a million miles an hour.

But when no one else moves, believing all of this in vain - she reaches over and does it herself.

“CLEAR!” She yells.

And she shocks her. And Lena braces, heart breaking and stomach churning at the sight of Kara’s sister putting her lifeless form through so much in a desperate and seemingly pointless attempt to bring her back.

And she shocks her again.

And again. And again.

Alex finally throws the paddles to the floor, the cords causing them to clang loudly as they bounce off the metal table - a violent echo that shatters the silence of the room.

And everyone just watches with sadness and pity as Alex starts her own violent compressions, as if they hadn’t already been working on Kara for an hour. And she pushes harder and harder - “Come on, Kara. Come on! You’re stronger than this. You’re the strongest person I know!” She tries, desperately.

“COME ON!” She screams, in tears as she STRIKES her in the chest now and then presses again. And again and again she pounds on her chest, “Please, Kara!” Alex cries fully now, face contorted and tears falling as her arms burn but she doesn’t stop pushing and pushing and striking and pushing some more - ignoring the sickening crack of Kara’s ribs and sternum beneath her unyielding force.

Doctor Dey has had enough, about to step in again to stop her -

When suddenly Lena pushes past him and joins Alex at Kara’s side.

“Breathe, Kara!” Lena cries now as Alex continues compressions, uttering the same words Kara had spoken to her their first night together, grabbing her limp hand and squeezing tightly it as Alex pushes harder and harder. “Please, just breathe! _KARA!_” Lena begs of her, tearful and desperate as Alex strikes her once more -

And a single beep pierces the silence of the room.

Alex’s eyes go wide and she stops, head whiplashing as the heart monitor skips once. Then again -

And then finds a heartbeat. It's slight and weak, but it's there. 

Doctor Dey’s mouth drops and the nurses shocked faces match as Alex gasps “Rhythm! We have a rhythm!”

And Lena gapes in shocked relief.

“_Jesus_…” the other doctor can’t believe it as they all descend on Kara again, hands moving and surrounding and pulling and injecting as Doctor Dey quickly bellows about clearing the OR.

——-

Indiscernible faces and voices merge and morph together.

There’s a deep echo.

The sound of crashing waves.

A mother’s loving laugh and a father’s comforting voice.

Someone says her name.

Then _everyone_ says her name all at once like a distant chorus, some muffled, some whispered. And then one breaks through the loudest. It's desperate and newly familiar - “_KARA!_”

Kara’s eyes burst open at the memory of Lena’s terrified, pleading voice.

Bright fluorescents greet her, painfully piercing tired blue eyes, which she shuts protectively for only a moment, and then reopens as something dark comes into view in a blur - 

Raven hair.

“Kara?” Lena asks, gentle and breathless and laced with relief. And then her face comes into focus. Her beautiful, soft, gorgeous face.

And then awareness finally registers for Kara, as the most recent memories she has flash in her head - of Lena and the lagoon.

Kara desperately squeezes the hand currently holding hers and the bandaged fingers of her other lift from their rested place on her stomach as she tries to reach for Lena.

And Lena recognizes that look. It’s concern. For _her_. Even though Kara lies in a hospital bed hooked up to machines and chest freshly sutured and body wrecked after somehow, barely surviving -

She’s worried about _Lena_ who’s standing over her, perfectly fine aside from a sutured gash in her knee.

“I’m alright.” Lena smiles through tears, assuring.

“And so are you.” She says stroking Kara face with her free hand. “You’re going to be alright.”

Lena says it as if she’s convincing herself it’s okay to finally believe.

And then she leans down and kisses Kara’s forehead in the same spot she kissed her that day at the hotel, brushing across her scar.

And Kara’s eyes clench at the feeling of Lena’s lips on her skin and the comforting sound of her voice. And tears roll down her temples.

“Kara! Thank God…” the voice huffs in deep, utter relief as Alex bursts back in. 

She rushes over and carefully but forcefully wraps herself around her sister’s body.

“You scared me._ So_ much.” Alex can’t help but almost cry as she also kisses Kara’s head, breathing in the smell of her and that ocean scent that’s usually such a comfort, but now is just something Alex wants to curse.

“Don’t you ever do that again! You hear me?” she pulls back, ordering right in Kara’s face.

And Kara can only nod, as she’s still getting her bearings.

And Kara’s eyes drift over to Lena again. And Alex notices. So she clears her throat and wipes her tears of relief, pulling back slowly.

“I’ll um, I’ll check on getting you another blanket.” she says, lovingly patting the thin covers on Kara’s legs. “You’re freezing. And I won’t have my sister freezing.” she finishes, resolute.

And Lena looks at Alex in sympathy and appreciation.

And Alex just nods to her, and then exits.

Once outside -

Alex breaks and more tears fall, hands coming to her knees momentarily before she straightens back up and wipes her eyes again, quickly composing herself now that she _knows_ her sister will be okay.

“Excuse me, Doctor Danvers?”

Alex turns in startle to find a woman with caramel skin and deep umber eyes -

Eyes that that shift down to note Alex’s name tag in relief.

“They said I could find you up here. I’m Kelly. I - was with your sister at the cliffs? I gave her CPR?”

Alex’s lip part to speak but no words form.

“Did she make it?” Kelly asks, tentatively and hopeful.

And Alex can only nod.

And Kelly sighs in relief, “_Thank God_. I - would’ve been here sooner, but traffic was terrible.”

Alex can finally form words, shaking her head in disbelief, “You - drove all this way, across the island?” she asks.

“Yeah.” Kelly replies, as if it’s obvious. As if anybody would’ve done the same. “I had to be sure she was alright.”

Alex just stares at her. And then suddenly - she lunges forward and wrapping her arms around the woman, pulling her into a tight hug of appreciation. Then she suddenly pulls back -

“I’m sorry, that was -“

“It’s fine.” Kelly assures her with a genuine and understanding smile.

“I just…” Alex tries, “What you did for her, starting compressions so soon, you saved her life._ You saved my sister’s life_.” she finishes, heart breaking at the thought of any other result.

And Kelly looks honored.

“I’m just glad I remembered my trauma training. It’s been years. I’m… a psychiatrist now, so I don’t spend a lot of time resuscitating patients.”

“Well I would hope not.” Alex jokes with a warm smile.

And Kelly grins and they share the laugh, as neither can take their eyes off each other.

And back inside the room -

Blue hasn’t left green since Alex stepped out, moments ago.

Kara swallows past the dry, scratchy throat. It’s a familiar feeling, caused by a breathing tube that must have been removed earlier.

“I’m sorry…” are the first raspy words she speaks.

“For what?” Lena asks in disbelief.

“For everything.” she says, breathless.

“No. No, you will not apologize to me. Not for this. You saved my life. Kara Danvers… you... are _my hero_.” she says, barely above a whisper, hands at her face and shaking her head as if pleading for Kara to believe her.

“I’m right here. I’m alive. Kara, don’t you see? You didn’t lose me.”

Kara’s brow furrows, curiously.

“I didn’t die. But _you_ did. For three and a half minutes. The longest three and a half minutes of my life. You were dead, Kara. You were gone.” she says, heart strained by the horrific memory.

And realization washes over Kara, as Lena swallows it all down to finally speak again - 

“I’d say that’s long enough to break a curse, wouldn’t you?”

Kara’s lips finally part and she exhales a heavy, cleansing breath.

And despite the pain and pressure of broken ribs and bruised sternum and sore lungs and healing sutures -

She leans up and pulls Lena in and kisses her.

She kisses her with desperate relief. With comfort. With _love_.

And then she has to part for air, because that’s something she doesn’t have a lot of at the moment, and Lena knows it.

“Careful.” she warns in concern, “You need to breathe, Kara.”

But Kara remains tilted up, foreheads close.

“I don’t want to.” she says, barely. Another reversal of roles from their first night.

And then she brings their lips together again.

And Lena gently lowers them back to the bed, without letting the kiss end, until Kara’s fully laid down again.

Lena then lets her lips drift over and she kisses Kara’s cheek as she climbs into the bed next to her, curling up against her, their faces tilted towards each other as Kara lays on her back and Lena’s on her side.

And there they remain, blue and green locked in on each other, intimately close and fingers intertwined.

Finally Lena speaks.

“I think that Doctor Dey has a crush on you.” she jests, lightly.

But Kara doesn’t speak or flinch or look away from Lena. She doesn’t care who likes her. She doesn’t care who looks at her. Because she never wants to look away from _Lena_.

And Lena’s humor fades and she knows what Kara’s thinking and it brings her an assurance and sense of completion she’s only ever dreamed of. So she closes her eyes and leans in to let their foreheads rest together again, as Kara does the same.

And they just lay there together for the longest time, as if they’re the only two people in the world.

——-

**WEEKS LATER**

Lena stares out at the crashing waves from the lounge chair outside Kara’s bungalow, tablet in hand as she works under a focused brow. And then she stops and she closes her eyes and just breathes.

She misses Kara terribly. The feel of her strong arms around her. The smell of her hair. The look of love in her deep blue eyes.

And then she feels Kara’s presence -

As she crosses the sand behind her.

Lena’s face breaks into a smile as she speaks over shoulder -

“How was your FaceTime with Kelly?”

“It was good.” Kara says, "She gives good talk from afar.”

And Lena smiles wider, so glad her sessions have been helping Kara process things she’d buried for so long. And not that Kara needed it, but getting a girlfriend’s family discount was a nice gesture. Though of course Kara insisted on paying full price.

She finally appears next to Lena, a bowl of cut mangos in hand as light music from her laptop now plays back at the porch - it’s Blue October’s “King” and it cuts through the sound of rough surf and pacific breeze to provide a lovely soundtrack for this bright, picturesque day.

Kara slips onto the chair beside Lena as she keeps working.

She sneaks a peek despite Lena’s attempts to prevent her.

“I like it.” Kara says of the images Lena’s in the process of sending to the major publication for their story on her. It wasn’t something Kara ever thought she’d do, talk publicly about the things she’s gone through and survived - until Ruby had told her how inspiring it would be to girls like her. So Kara had accepted the offer on the one condition that Lena takes the photos. She’d already stepped down from her own magazine, turning it all over to her partner Andrea. And she’d never looked back. But Kara knew after seeing the incredible images she’d taken of her for this piece, her passion coming through the lens, Lena would never be at a loss for meaningful work.

Kara extends the fruit to Lena, the simple gesture reminding her to eat.

“Kara, I’m supposed to be waiting on _you_.”

“You have been.” Kara shifts, settling in more. “For weeks.”

She gently strokes Lena’s knee, thumb tracing a newfound scar that's clearly visible against porcelain skin.

Lena looks at Kara as she stares out to the ocean.

“You’re just dying to get back out there aren’t you?”

“Yeah-“ Kara takes a breath, then turns to Lena, “But I’m fine right here for now.”

And Kara kisses her. It’s meant to be light, but becomes a bit deeper than intended.

A throaty, wanton sigh escapes Kara’s lips as her hand grips Lena’s leg a little tighter.

“Kara.” Lena warns, “The doctors said -"

“The doctors said my heart was healthy. Even Alex said it was like it never happened.”

“And your lung?” Lena shoots back.

“Fine, so I won’t hold my breath. There’s plenty of other things I can do to you.” she says low as Lena grins into another kiss as Kara’s hand slips up higher and higher, stopping inside her upper thigh, just at the edge of Lena’s white shorts.

“You think I don’t hear you?” She says now, barely above a whisper in Lena’s ear. “At night, when you touch yourself as you lay right next to me.”

“I always stop.” Lena swallows. “I want to wait for you.”

“You don’t have to.” Kara says.

“I do.” Lena argues.

“Mm.” Kara leans in even closer, breath on Lena’s neck, lips lightly tracing the skin, somehow sending both chills and warmth shooting throughout Lena’s body.

“Do you know how badly I’ve wanted to reach over and help you?” Kara admits without abandon.

This knocks the air from Lena’s lungs. Because _fuck_ \- Kara always says the hottest things. And for weeks, it’s been so difficult to take it.

The last time they’d been together was the day of the wedding. Ever since then it’s just been Lena playing nurse and Kara recovering and making things so much more difficult by always looking the way she does. Helping Kara bathe and change and function the first few days, she’d felt nothing but waves of warmth and gratitude and love. But when it was clear Kara was fully on the mend, that she would be perfectly okay soon, that wave of warmth shifted lower, especially when Kara looked at her with hungry, seductive eyes. Or pulled her into the shower or bath with her, as she always tended to do.

But they’d had to hold back, and it was _torturous_.

So now as Kara’s hand starts to graze her thigh, slinking further up and under her shorts -

“If -“ Lena gasps when her fingertips make contact - and she’s suddenly so glad Kara’s fingers have healed, with rough new scars only adding to the collection - as she starts to make small, circular movements.

“If we do this-” Lena gargles on caught breath, “You have - to promise…” she stops Kara’s hand from further movement so she can think and speak -

“You’ll let me do all the work.”

Kara licks her lips.

“Fifty percent.” Kara offers, pushing past Lena’s resolve both literally and figuratively as she slips inside of her, easily due to Lena’s unbearable need.

Lena lets out a whine and tightens her thighs together, which only makes it all worse -

“Ninety.” Lena practically chokes.

Kara goes deeper as Lena groans and pulls her hand tighter against her and -

“Sixty.” Kara negotiates, her bicep flexing under Lena’s tightened grip.

“Seventy five, it’s my final offer.” Lena says with her voice hitting too high of a pitch to even remotely be intimidating.

And Kara grins and her thumb sweeps Lena’s front as her fingers curl and she pushes further and Lena pulls her in with a gasp, her other hand grasping desperately at Kara’s strong shoulder that she’s practically wrapped around. And there’s an an involuntary jerk of her hips - as she hits a blinding explosion of pleasure just that quick and easy -

“Done.” Kara whispers in her ear as Lena shudders and Kara just holds her, stilling her.

And then Lena breathes and grins and kisses Kara with a look of playful admonishment.

And they stare deeply in each other’s eyes for the longest time, as Kara runs a now free hand through Lena’s hair. And she looks at her with that weighted brow and set jaw Lena loves so much.

And Lena’s eyes search hers, curiously, wondering what she’s thinking.

“You know I’m going to marry you, right?” Kara says with a low but soft seriousness. 

Tears well in Lena’s eyes as she’s overwhelmed, in the best way. And maybe it’s just the serotonin in her brain from Kara’s fingers a moment ago, or maybe it’s just how she’s looking at her like she’s never loved anything more, but Lena kisses her firmly, pouring her answer into it. Even though the question itself wasn’t even asked.

“Promise me in six years we’ll still lock ourselves in a honeymoon suit?” she asks, despite the sweet gravity of the moment.

Kara holds back a smile.

“I just fingered you in a beach chair Lena, I don’t think we’ll have that problem.” she responds, finally fully grinning she leans in to kiss Lena again, which especially now that she can't surf just yet is _definitely_ her favorite thing to do.

And Lena sighs in contentment.

“Want to go cash in that seventy five?” She asks flirtatiously as her hand drifts to Kara’s somehow still rock hard abs, teasing to dip even further below.

“In a minute?” Kara asks, looking at Lena with more love than lust.

And Lena melts. Because leave it to Kara to reject fulfillment of her own needs as if meeting Lena’s was all she desired, and now she’s good just sitting and holding her.

Lena finds herself _thanking_ the fates now. For bringing Kara into her life. For putting them on that crash course for each other that first day in the water. For giving her someone who would love, honor and cherish her for as long as they both shall live.

And they both knew with confidence now - that would be a _very_ long time.

The music suddenly changes, as “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” by Israel Kamakawiwoʻole begins to play behind them.

Lena kisses Kara gently, sinking in with the heartwarming sound of the late singer’s soothing voice and gentle strum of the ukulele.

“I’ll walk down the aisle to this one day.” she says of the beautiful track.

Kara’s lips curl against her. “You will. It’s one of my favorites.”

Lena looks surprised to learn this, but also not at all, as she smiles.

“Mine too.” she exhales.

And yeah, Kara was right, maybe they did know each other in another life. So whatever happens in this one, they’ll always find their way back to each other.

_Because they’re soulmates._

Kara and Lena shift and settle in, perfectly fit together wrapped in each other’s arms, watching the waves crash and breathing in the pacific breeze… as the music plays on.

END.


End file.
